Tom
@tom13013.bsky.social
I've traveled over half our state to be here tonight. I couldn't get away sooner because my new well was coming in at Coyote Hills, and I had to see about it.
Everyone on football night in America should be executed by firing squad
October 6, 2025 at 12:03 AM
Everyone on football night in America should be executed by firing squad
Reposted by Tom
"We're going to create superintelligence" How about making outlook search work first. How about that
October 3, 2025 at 5:18 PM
"We're going to create superintelligence" How about making outlook search work first. How about that
Reposted by Tom
i love brent key so much
September 13, 2025 at 7:26 PM
i love brent key so much
Reposted by Tom
By age 33 you should be completely inept, dumb ass , can't open up, falling a lot, tripping on shoelaces, forget to tie shoes, start wearing velcro shoes, trip on other crap, fall and hit face on pavement, blood everywhere, bleeding face
September 7, 2025 at 5:44 AM
By age 33 you should be completely inept, dumb ass , can't open up, falling a lot, tripping on shoelaces, forget to tie shoes, start wearing velcro shoes, trip on other crap, fall and hit face on pavement, blood everywhere, bleeding face
Reposted by Tom
I paid sixty dollars for No Man's Sky nine years ago and they refuse to stop making the video game. I've begged them to go home to their families but they won't stop adding new kinds of weird little guys and like, optimizing the gentle patter of rain on an alien ocean. Please let me pay for a DLC
January 29, 2025 at 4:56 PM
I paid sixty dollars for No Man's Sky nine years ago and they refuse to stop making the video game. I've begged them to go home to their families but they won't stop adding new kinds of weird little guys and like, optimizing the gentle patter of rain on an alien ocean. Please let me pay for a DLC
Reposted by Tom
Army needs to bring back woke and LGBTQ+
Lotsa
Good
Blocking,
Tackling and
Quarterbacking
+ not losing to an FCS team
Lotsa
Good
Blocking,
Tackling and
Quarterbacking
+ not losing to an FCS team
August 30, 2025 at 2:08 AM
Army needs to bring back woke and LGBTQ+
Lotsa
Good
Blocking,
Tackling and
Quarterbacking
+ not losing to an FCS team
Lotsa
Good
Blocking,
Tackling and
Quarterbacking
+ not losing to an FCS team
Reposted by Tom
Did You Know: Hawaii beat Stanford at football because they are a better school
August 24, 2025 at 3:08 AM
Did You Know: Hawaii beat Stanford at football because they are a better school
Reposted by Tom
Reboot Anthony Bourdain’s “No Reservations” but with Alan Dershowitz and the whole show is just enjoying him never getting food because he’s a querulous, joyless douche and he’s constantly demanding that the Laotian street vendor or whoever denounce Hamas before he’ll try the khao jee
August 11, 2025 at 3:40 AM
Reboot Anthony Bourdain’s “No Reservations” but with Alan Dershowitz and the whole show is just enjoying him never getting food because he’s a querulous, joyless douche and he’s constantly demanding that the Laotian street vendor or whoever denounce Hamas before he’ll try the khao jee
Reposted by Tom
Our flâneur president is exploring the psychogeography of the White House in the context of its urban environment but go off
August 5, 2025 at 3:07 PM
Our flâneur president is exploring the psychogeography of the White House in the context of its urban environment but go off
Reposted by Tom
The Braves or their stadium shouldn’t be allowed on national TV until they can go 90 minutes without 40,000 hicks doing the chop
July 15, 2025 at 1:47 AM
The Braves or their stadium shouldn’t be allowed on national TV until they can go 90 minutes without 40,000 hicks doing the chop
Reposted by Tom
presumably other sports have this problem from time to time but nothing brings me joy the way a baseball game delay because there's a recalcitrant animal on the field brings me joy
March 13, 2025 at 2:27 AM
presumably other sports have this problem from time to time but nothing brings me joy the way a baseball game delay because there's a recalcitrant animal on the field brings me joy
Reposted by Tom
Showing up to family court wearing a shirt that says “Good Trouble” and walking out before the judge issues full custody to my wife.
March 5, 2025 at 3:07 AM
Showing up to family court wearing a shirt that says “Good Trouble” and walking out before the judge issues full custody to my wife.
I will never watch a prestige Apple TV drama. This is a blood oath I have taken
March 1, 2025 at 6:35 AM
I will never watch a prestige Apple TV drama. This is a blood oath I have taken
Reposted by Tom
Someone tell Schumer that the OPM is being taken over by college students protesting a genocide so we can actually see some urgency from the opposition party
February 2, 2025 at 7:40 AM
Someone tell Schumer that the OPM is being taken over by college students protesting a genocide so we can actually see some urgency from the opposition party
Any Chiefs fan can drop a pin and fight me at any time, no qualifiers
February 2, 2025 at 4:28 AM
Any Chiefs fan can drop a pin and fight me at any time, no qualifiers
Main takeaway: stop throwing the goal line fade
January 27, 2025 at 3:09 AM
Main takeaway: stop throwing the goal line fade
Being a catholic is all about pounding the damn rock
January 21, 2025 at 1:05 AM
Being a catholic is all about pounding the damn rock
Reposted by Tom
18 PLAYS 75 YARDS AND 9 MINUTES AND 45 SECONDS
HELLLLLLLL YES.
HELLLLLLLL YES.
January 21, 2025 at 1:02 AM
18 PLAYS 75 YARDS AND 9 MINUTES AND 45 SECONDS
HELLLLLLLL YES.
HELLLLLLLL YES.
Reposted by Tom
they got better phone apps for kids, dank food, hot babes, sick electric cars, megacities that make ours look like hovels. we are toilet nation, mark. the hyperloop pedophile has strangled our ability to have good shit. deal with that first you fuckin dope
I’m concerned that Americans are flocking to a number of adversary-owned social media platforms. We still need a comprehensive and risk-based approach to assessing and mitigating the risks of foreign-owned apps.
January 15, 2025 at 12:00 AM
they got better phone apps for kids, dank food, hot babes, sick electric cars, megacities that make ours look like hovels. we are toilet nation, mark. the hyperloop pedophile has strangled our ability to have good shit. deal with that first you fuckin dope
Me to my gf every time Cooper Flagg touches the ball: “he’s from Maine”
January 15, 2025 at 3:44 AM
Me to my gf every time Cooper Flagg touches the ball: “he’s from Maine”
Reposted by Tom
the world, which seems tragically harsh and even doomed on a two coffees empty stomach, now seems alive with possibility after 900 calories of lunch. No conclusions to draw from that
May 2, 2023 at 12:56 PM
the world, which seems tragically harsh and even doomed on a two coffees empty stomach, now seems alive with possibility after 900 calories of lunch. No conclusions to draw from that
Reposted by Tom
AJ Brown: [reading House of Leaves on the sideline, his eyes turn jet black, the sky fills with ravens]
Tom Brady: wow
Tom Brady: wow
January 13, 2025 at 12:45 AM
AJ Brown: [reading House of Leaves on the sideline, his eyes turn jet black, the sky fills with ravens]
Tom Brady: wow
Tom Brady: wow
Reposted by Tom
after days of grifters and con men at CES we stumbled upon the booth for VLC. they were all dressed as wizards and told us, "we have nothing to sell, we just decided to show up". i told them I'd been using their software to pirate media for 15 years and they said "keep doing that"
January 10, 2025 at 9:24 PM
after days of grifters and con men at CES we stumbled upon the booth for VLC. they were all dressed as wizards and told us, "we have nothing to sell, we just decided to show up". i told them I'd been using their software to pirate media for 15 years and they said "keep doing that"