never lose sight of your true self

Time for that old Marie Curie music

One thing about adult life is that making same-day plans becomes quite difficult. And not necessarily because you’re super busy or anything, but because maybe you’ve already taken a chicken breast out of the freezer and, well, your fate has now been sealed along with that of the chicken breast.

You shouldn't be allowed to have bad dreams. What are you doing, brain? This is our sanctuary. This is where we met John Cena that one time.

My Oscar would be for my performance in I’m Good. How Are You?

SORRY. Sorry.
Have we seen this *incredible* news video coming out of Queensland? Wait for the witness/witnesses statement

I’m just a girl standing in front of a guillotine watching a detached head roll around and thinking:
I thought this thing was for cheese

Therapist: It's all in your head.

Me: Yeah, unfortunately I am also in there.

Feed me

I have been laughing at this all day.