Pinned
slate
@pleasebegneiss.bsky.social
· Nov 12
since bluesky doesn’t have a drafts folder i’m just going to write my drafts under this post. nobody look, these aren’t finished yet
it’s funny because they’re eating mcdonald’s on the ground like poor people
November 24, 2025 at 5:04 AM
it’s funny because they’re eating mcdonald’s on the ground like poor people
after they release the epstein files they should release the batgirl movie
November 24, 2025 at 4:14 AM
after they release the epstein files they should release the batgirl movie
RIP DOGE, you were just a fucking kid
November 24, 2025 at 4:12 AM
RIP DOGE, you were just a fucking kid
i guarantee there are conservatives who think these guys invented communism
“AT THE CIRCUS” (1939) dir. Edward Buzzell
Groucho Marx, Harpo Marx, Chico Marx
🎬 Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer
Groucho Marx, Harpo Marx, Chico Marx
🎬 Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer
November 24, 2025 at 3:39 AM
i guarantee there are conservatives who think these guys invented communism
i think if you voted for the same guy in 2016 and 2024 you should sit the next election out as part of a “fool me twice” situation
November 24, 2025 at 3:36 AM
i think if you voted for the same guy in 2016 and 2024 you should sit the next election out as part of a “fool me twice” situation
these people would not last 5 min in a horror movie. “oh there’s a noise in the attic? can’t be anything good. better go see what it is.” not me though, i’m turning my tv volume up. that’s none of my business
Good morning. In the past 24 hours, more Americans have Googled “felching” than have searched for “turkey recipes”
November 24, 2025 at 2:48 AM
these people would not last 5 min in a horror movie. “oh there’s a noise in the attic? can’t be anything good. better go see what it is.” not me though, i’m turning my tv volume up. that’s none of my business
[walking through costco with a turkey] look it’s purely ceremonial, she means nothing to me
the rotisserie chickens: just leave
the rotisserie chickens: just leave
November 24, 2025 at 2:30 AM
[walking through costco with a turkey] look it’s purely ceremonial, she means nothing to me
the rotisserie chickens: just leave
the rotisserie chickens: just leave
playing tom raider. hide your toms
November 23, 2025 at 4:56 AM
playing tom raider. hide your toms
Reposted by slate
michelle obama stood in front of the portrait of her husband. it had been 2 years since he went missing…but she knew the truth. Michelle turned to the figure behind her. She chuckled. “Yeah. I know about the Chaos Emeralds.”
November 23, 2025 at 2:56 AM
michelle obama stood in front of the portrait of her husband. it had been 2 years since he went missing…but she knew the truth. Michelle turned to the figure behind her. She chuckled. “Yeah. I know about the Chaos Emeralds.”
i think kevin spacey living out of a suitcase is too good. let me know when he’s living out of an old boot like a hermit crab
November 23, 2025 at 12:46 AM
i think kevin spacey living out of a suitcase is too good. let me know when he’s living out of an old boot like a hermit crab
oh this guy is SMITTEN
November 22, 2025 at 11:37 PM
oh this guy is SMITTEN
when the edible and adderall kick in at the same time
November 22, 2025 at 6:27 PM
when the edible and adderall kick in at the same time
trump asking zohran about universal free childcare
November 22, 2025 at 2:38 AM
trump asking zohran about universal free childcare
Mamdani put Trump in a better mood than he’s been in for weeks
November 21, 2025 at 11:44 PM
Mamdani put Trump in a better mood than he’s been in for weeks
ok but i didn’t know we could ask for that
November 21, 2025 at 9:42 PM
ok but i didn’t know we could ask for that
we are not even a quarter way through this boss fight
November 21, 2025 at 4:22 AM
we are not even a quarter way through this boss fight
any historian able to tell me what stage of democracy it is in when the leader is saying “off with their heads”
November 21, 2025 at 2:59 AM
any historian able to tell me what stage of democracy it is in when the leader is saying “off with their heads”
Reposted by slate
Oh, they made a Pokémon that vapes
November 21, 2025 at 12:52 AM
Oh, they made a Pokémon that vapes
we’re going to get the tv version of the epstein files with commercial breaks and whatnot
November 20, 2025 at 4:10 AM
we’re going to get the tv version of the epstein files with commercial breaks and whatnot
Reposted by slate
[sinking in quicksand]
me: oh no
wife: we’ll be fine if we just remain still and wait for help
me: ok
[mambo no. 5 starts to play]
me: OH NO
me: oh no
wife: we’ll be fine if we just remain still and wait for help
me: ok
[mambo no. 5 starts to play]
me: OH NO
November 19, 2025 at 3:00 PM
[sinking in quicksand]
me: oh no
wife: we’ll be fine if we just remain still and wait for help
me: ok
[mambo no. 5 starts to play]
me: OH NO
me: oh no
wife: we’ll be fine if we just remain still and wait for help
me: ok
[mambo no. 5 starts to play]
me: OH NO
really should’ve been a guy from Road Rules
I can’t believe the guy from Real World is in charge of travel in this country.
November 19, 2025 at 8:25 PM
really should’ve been a guy from Road Rules
Reposted by slate
Mechanic [sliding out from under Optimus Prime]: I think I see what the issue is. This truck is also a big guy somehow
November 18, 2025 at 3:48 PM
Mechanic [sliding out from under Optimus Prime]: I think I see what the issue is. This truck is also a big guy somehow
me scrolling past names like nuzzi and lizza
November 18, 2025 at 7:10 AM
me scrolling past names like nuzzi and lizza