Not Merritt Stone
@notmerrittstone.bsky.social
Don’t follow me; I’m lost too.
Pinned
Actually this *is* my first rodeo when do we eat the horses
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
We have to care deeply about what could be inside a box or else it won't matter, we open another empty promise. I once said on a game show, heart unseen, that I give myself to door number three. It's going to sound gross but we still unveil each other
December 14, 2025 at 5:44 AM
We have to care deeply about what could be inside a box or else it won't matter, we open another empty promise. I once said on a game show, heart unseen, that I give myself to door number three. It's going to sound gross but we still unveil each other
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
I need to decompose. Oops I mean decompress. No, actually, the first one
December 15, 2025 at 3:13 AM
I need to decompose. Oops I mean decompress. No, actually, the first one
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
First snow of the year and you know what that means. It’s time to check in on my terrible horrible wife Lorelai
December 14, 2025 at 5:55 AM
First snow of the year and you know what that means. It’s time to check in on my terrible horrible wife Lorelai
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
i do not like living out of boxes i want to live out of the unusually large aquarium at the dentist’s office
December 11, 2025 at 8:10 PM
i do not like living out of boxes i want to live out of the unusually large aquarium at the dentist’s office
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
doctor who slides into the room like Kramer and holds for applause before telling you your dad didn't make it through surgery
May 19, 2023 at 5:42 PM
doctor who slides into the room like Kramer and holds for applause before telling you your dad didn't make it through surgery
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
can anyone recommend a good roomba obedience school
December 9, 2025 at 9:31 PM
can anyone recommend a good roomba obedience school
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
did it in four words hemmingway
December 9, 2025 at 10:15 PM
did it in four words hemmingway
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
"no rapping tonight"
why?
"you rap about patrick swayze everytime, it's embarrassing"
ok
[after one beer]
uh oh y'all it's gettin kinda hazy
why?
"you rap about patrick swayze everytime, it's embarrassing"
ok
[after one beer]
uh oh y'all it's gettin kinda hazy
August 12, 2023 at 3:47 PM
"no rapping tonight"
why?
"you rap about patrick swayze everytime, it's embarrassing"
ok
[after one beer]
uh oh y'all it's gettin kinda hazy
why?
"you rap about patrick swayze everytime, it's embarrassing"
ok
[after one beer]
uh oh y'all it's gettin kinda hazy
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
I have to say, the highlight of the Christmas Lights Parade was the little boy yelling “Throw me your elf! I’m gonna eat that bitch!”
December 7, 2025 at 2:41 AM
I have to say, the highlight of the Christmas Lights Parade was the little boy yelling “Throw me your elf! I’m gonna eat that bitch!”
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
“A Man for All Seasons” (1966)
December 6, 2025 at 7:46 PM
“A Man for All Seasons” (1966)
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
*something good or bad happens in real life* I better report this to the virtual world
December 3, 2025 at 3:56 PM
*something good or bad happens in real life* I better report this to the virtual world
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
I’ve entered a physical library. I may have trapped myself.
October 10, 2025 at 3:28 PM
I’ve entered a physical library. I may have trapped myself.
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
walking with my hands behind my back so people think i am wise
November 30, 2025 at 3:51 PM
walking with my hands behind my back so people think i am wise
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
I'll just floss tomorrow
I'll just floss tomorrow
I'll just floss tomorrow
December 1, 2025 at 7:00 AM
I'll just floss tomorrow
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
Okay yes, I have had a lot of doors come in and out of my life but to tell a potential forever door that I am just revolving door material, what kind of foyerpist are you
November 29, 2025 at 5:42 AM
Okay yes, I have had a lot of doors come in and out of my life but to tell a potential forever door that I am just revolving door material, what kind of foyerpist are you
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
I'll just floss tomorrow
I'll just floss tomorrow
I'll just floss tomorrow
November 29, 2025 at 6:44 AM
I'll just floss tomorrow
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
Everything I'm doing fits in less and less. Take living in a hole hoarding all positive space for example
November 28, 2025 at 6:04 AM
Everything I'm doing fits in less and less. Take living in a hole hoarding all positive space for example
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
I'll just floss tomorrow
I'll just floss tomorrow
I'll just floss tomorrow
November 28, 2025 at 4:56 AM
I'll just floss tomorrow
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
At this point I would pay a small amount of money to disable ALL AI features on all my devices.
November 26, 2025 at 2:28 PM
At this point I would pay a small amount of money to disable ALL AI features on all my devices.
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
...VENGEANCE.
November 27, 2025 at 7:05 AM
...VENGEANCE.
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
Broken branch is a hell of a thing to really identify with. So you're just like, reaching out to be an integral part of the biological process and suddenly your spirit is heavy well shit, twig. You crunched is it a ghost
November 22, 2025 at 5:39 AM
Broken branch is a hell of a thing to really identify with. So you're just like, reaching out to be an integral part of the biological process and suddenly your spirit is heavy well shit, twig. You crunched is it a ghost
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
In the moonlight we move as if puppeted by stars and I don't like it either. Let's get tangled in the dim shadows of trees for a chance to break away from the ironically oppressive energy of magical nudity
November 17, 2025 at 5:42 AM
In the moonlight we move as if puppeted by stars and I don't like it either. Let's get tangled in the dim shadows of trees for a chance to break away from the ironically oppressive energy of magical nudity
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
I'll just floss tomorrow
I'll just floss tomorrow
I'll just floss tomorrow
November 17, 2025 at 5:42 AM
I'll just floss tomorrow
Reposted by Not Merritt Stone
Oh, you're digging deep and liking all my toots?
Well, guess what? Two people can do that thing.
More, probably.
I don't think there's an upper limit to these things.
Well, guess what? Two people can do that thing.
More, probably.
I don't think there's an upper limit to these things.
November 17, 2025 at 1:13 AM
Oh, you're digging deep and liking all my toots?
Well, guess what? Two people can do that thing.
More, probably.
I don't think there's an upper limit to these things.
Well, guess what? Two people can do that thing.
More, probably.
I don't think there's an upper limit to these things.