@jackobobble.bsky.social
Reposted
Their messaging is so fucking incoherent. Maduro was an illegitimate leader who lost in 2024, which is why we're replacing him with his VP instead of the person who won in 2024. We did this to stop fentanyl, which is why he's indicted for cocaine.
We're also occupying Venezuela via Zoom call.
We're also occupying Venezuela via Zoom call.
January 3, 2026 at 9:18 PM
Their messaging is so fucking incoherent. Maduro was an illegitimate leader who lost in 2024, which is why we're replacing him with his VP instead of the person who won in 2024. We did this to stop fentanyl, which is why he's indicted for cocaine.
We're also occupying Venezuela via Zoom call.
We're also occupying Venezuela via Zoom call.
"'I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.'
-Steven Wright"
-Donald Trump
-Steven Wright"
-Donald Trump
October 10, 2025 at 11:00 PM
"'I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.'
-Steven Wright"
-Donald Trump
-Steven Wright"
-Donald Trump
Do you think some of the dinosaurs were taken in a velocirapture?
September 25, 2025 at 4:05 AM
Do you think some of the dinosaurs were taken in a velocirapture?
If scientists in Antarctica had boy/girl twins, they should name then Penn and Guinevere.
September 21, 2025 at 5:31 AM
If scientists in Antarctica had boy/girl twins, they should name then Penn and Guinevere.
Reposted
ONLINE LEFTIST: what if we tried to find a candidate that's good
ONLINE LIBERAL: congratulations your attitude just killed us all. we're dead. hope you're happy. we could've just had trans people be dead but nooooo you and your purity tests put a gun to our heads and squeezed. enjoy the camps homo 🖕
ONLINE LIBERAL: congratulations your attitude just killed us all. we're dead. hope you're happy. we could've just had trans people be dead but nooooo you and your purity tests put a gun to our heads and squeezed. enjoy the camps homo 🖕
August 23, 2025 at 4:23 AM
ONLINE LEFTIST: what if we tried to find a candidate that's good
ONLINE LIBERAL: congratulations your attitude just killed us all. we're dead. hope you're happy. we could've just had trans people be dead but nooooo you and your purity tests put a gun to our heads and squeezed. enjoy the camps homo 🖕
ONLINE LIBERAL: congratulations your attitude just killed us all. we're dead. hope you're happy. we could've just had trans people be dead but nooooo you and your purity tests put a gun to our heads and squeezed. enjoy the camps homo 🖕
I wonder if, when the Pope is feeling like something is impossible, he looks in the mirror and says, "it's VatiCAN, not VatiCAN'T"?
August 10, 2025 at 5:05 AM
I wonder if, when the Pope is feeling like something is impossible, he looks in the mirror and says, "it's VatiCAN, not VatiCAN'T"?
“You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand" -Jesus
“I guess you guys aren't ready for that yet. But your kids are gonna love it.” -Marty McFly
...is Back to the Future a Christian allegory and I totally missed it as a kid?
“I guess you guys aren't ready for that yet. But your kids are gonna love it.” -Marty McFly
...is Back to the Future a Christian allegory and I totally missed it as a kid?
August 7, 2025 at 4:31 PM
“You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand" -Jesus
“I guess you guys aren't ready for that yet. But your kids are gonna love it.” -Marty McFly
...is Back to the Future a Christian allegory and I totally missed it as a kid?
“I guess you guys aren't ready for that yet. But your kids are gonna love it.” -Marty McFly
...is Back to the Future a Christian allegory and I totally missed it as a kid?
I don't miss Obama, but I do miss a time when it was news that he wore a tan suit.
Trump could wear a Nazi armband and it would probably blow over at about the same rate.
Trump could wear a Nazi armband and it would probably blow over at about the same rate.
August 5, 2025 at 10:01 PM
I don't miss Obama, but I do miss a time when it was news that he wore a tan suit.
Trump could wear a Nazi armband and it would probably blow over at about the same rate.
Trump could wear a Nazi armband and it would probably blow over at about the same rate.
I paraphrased this to my therapist, but forgot the "me" part and said "sound familiar?"
She looked sheepish and said "more than you know."
I think I called my therapist out for bad relationship choices.
She looked sheepish and said "more than you know."
I think I called my therapist out for bad relationship choices.
July 16, 2025 at 7:37 PM
I paraphrased this to my therapist, but forgot the "me" part and said "sound familiar?"
She looked sheepish and said "more than you know."
I think I called my therapist out for bad relationship choices.
She looked sheepish and said "more than you know."
I think I called my therapist out for bad relationship choices.
What about you, @jayetoro.bsky.social ?
Some days, I Jessican't.
June 22, 2025 at 6:04 AM
What about you, @jayetoro.bsky.social ?
When you want to avoid being basic while complimenting someone's looks, but you also want it to be a pun?
You can do worse than "your nostrils are breathtaking."
You can do worse than "your nostrils are breathtaking."
June 17, 2025 at 1:24 AM
When you want to avoid being basic while complimenting someone's looks, but you also want it to be a pun?
You can do worse than "your nostrils are breathtaking."
You can do worse than "your nostrils are breathtaking."
My toxic trait is that I always forget about Queen Anne of Great Britain.
My second toxic trait is that I can't. Shut. Up.
My second toxic trait is that I can't. Shut. Up.
June 10, 2025 at 8:10 PM
My toxic trait is that I always forget about Queen Anne of Great Britain.
My second toxic trait is that I can't. Shut. Up.
My second toxic trait is that I can't. Shut. Up.
Reposted
If I were able to deliver a message to either of these guys, my message would be this:
"You're going to let that other guy treat you like this? Make a public fool of you? After all you did for him? I thought you were a big shot. Act like a man!"
That's should settle things down.
"You're going to let that other guy treat you like this? Make a public fool of you? After all you did for him? I thought you were a big shot. Act like a man!"
That's should settle things down.
June 5, 2025 at 9:50 PM
If I were able to deliver a message to either of these guys, my message would be this:
"You're going to let that other guy treat you like this? Make a public fool of you? After all you did for him? I thought you were a big shot. Act like a man!"
That's should settle things down.
"You're going to let that other guy treat you like this? Make a public fool of you? After all you did for him? I thought you were a big shot. Act like a man!"
That's should settle things down.
Reposted
Happy pride month ❤️🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈
June 2, 2025 at 5:47 AM
Happy pride month ❤️🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈
Reposted
Sesame Street can't stop taking W's lately
June 1, 2025 at 11:08 PM
Sesame Street can't stop taking W's lately
When asked how I can support Palestine with claims they are anti-LGBT, I just can't help but wonder:
1. If they think that everyone who doesn't like them should die?
2. If so, if they think children should die for their parents' beliefs?
3. If they don't know that there's also gay Palestinians?
1. If they think that everyone who doesn't like them should die?
2. If so, if they think children should die for their parents' beliefs?
3. If they don't know that there's also gay Palestinians?
June 1, 2025 at 9:30 PM
When asked how I can support Palestine with claims they are anti-LGBT, I just can't help but wonder:
1. If they think that everyone who doesn't like them should die?
2. If so, if they think children should die for their parents' beliefs?
3. If they don't know that there's also gay Palestinians?
1. If they think that everyone who doesn't like them should die?
2. If so, if they think children should die for their parents' beliefs?
3. If they don't know that there's also gay Palestinians?
Reposted
Still thinking about how the OB said they want all babies to be between the 25th and 75th percentiles and I joked that I bet only half of all babies can meet that standard and he was like what
May 30, 2025 at 8:03 PM
Still thinking about how the OB said they want all babies to be between the 25th and 75th percentiles and I joked that I bet only half of all babies can meet that standard and he was like what
If Martin Scorsese had a religion, would it be called The Director's Cult?
May 31, 2025 at 4:02 AM
If Martin Scorsese had a religion, would it be called The Director's Cult?
That @shadowtodd.bsky.social appreciates the upside of my wife also being my ex-girlfriend makes up for the fact that I had to get a roadside battery replacement immediately after getting *eight* fillings today.
May 29, 2025 at 3:36 AM
That @shadowtodd.bsky.social appreciates the upside of my wife also being my ex-girlfriend makes up for the fact that I had to get a roadside battery replacement immediately after getting *eight* fillings today.
In other news, I've decided that I want to teach my dog "be a good neighbor!" as another way of asking him to be a good quiet boy.
May 29, 2025 at 1:27 AM
In other news, I've decided that I want to teach my dog "be a good neighbor!" as another way of asking him to be a good quiet boy.
When you high five your wife so well that their overall straps come undone in the middle of a restaurant, you know you're good.
May 29, 2025 at 12:55 AM
When you high five your wife so well that their overall straps come undone in the middle of a restaurant, you know you're good.
Reposted
hate it when i'm caught in a time rift which ages me a thousand years in moments but denies me the release of death. i prefer it when that doesn't happen
May 26, 2025 at 8:29 AM
hate it when i'm caught in a time rift which ages me a thousand years in moments but denies me the release of death. i prefer it when that doesn't happen
This is America.
Kady Grass, a lesbian teenager in Illinois, was severely beaten after trying to use the bathroom in a McDonald's.
www.cbsnews.com/amp/chicago/...
www.cbsnews.com/amp/chicago/...
May 25, 2025 at 5:29 AM
This is America.