Em Says
@emslyce.bsky.social
Working mom in the streets, dead tired in the sheets
My echo show thought it would be helpful to very publicly display items similar to those I purchased as Christmas gifts for my family. No, I’m not still shopping, you grinch!
December 19, 2024 at 2:27 PM
My echo show thought it would be helpful to very publicly display items similar to those I purchased as Christmas gifts for my family. No, I’m not still shopping, you grinch!
Reposted by Em Says
A list of the number of chromosomes of ten different organisms…
Fruit fly = 8
Housefly = 12
Snail = 24
Frog = 26
American badger = 32
Red fox = 34
Cat = 38
Dolphin = 44
Human = 46
Pineapple = 50
* I, for one, welcome our future pineapple overlords
Fruit fly = 8
Housefly = 12
Snail = 24
Frog = 26
American badger = 32
Red fox = 34
Cat = 38
Dolphin = 44
Human = 46
Pineapple = 50
* I, for one, welcome our future pineapple overlords
December 19, 2024 at 10:03 AM
A list of the number of chromosomes of ten different organisms…
Fruit fly = 8
Housefly = 12
Snail = 24
Frog = 26
American badger = 32
Red fox = 34
Cat = 38
Dolphin = 44
Human = 46
Pineapple = 50
* I, for one, welcome our future pineapple overlords
Fruit fly = 8
Housefly = 12
Snail = 24
Frog = 26
American badger = 32
Red fox = 34
Cat = 38
Dolphin = 44
Human = 46
Pineapple = 50
* I, for one, welcome our future pineapple overlords
Reposted by Em Says
netflix should do a documentary on people who aren’t ready to order when they get to the counter.
December 17, 2024 at 6:23 PM
netflix should do a documentary on people who aren’t ready to order when they get to the counter.
Reposted by Em Says
Adult films give younger people the wrong idea of how quick a plumber can come to your house 🤣
December 17, 2024 at 12:34 AM
Adult films give younger people the wrong idea of how quick a plumber can come to your house 🤣
At a Christmas market and my kids are begging for everything. I suggested they dress up as Dickensonian children with a little soot on their faces to make it more festive.
December 15, 2024 at 6:39 PM
At a Christmas market and my kids are begging for everything. I suggested they dress up as Dickensonian children with a little soot on their faces to make it more festive.
Reposted by Em Says
They're Santa's drones. He's checking if you're being naughty or nice
December 15, 2024 at 5:41 PM
They're Santa's drones. He's checking if you're being naughty or nice
Reposted by Em Says
Jaded 5-year-old ambulance driver arrives at the scene, shakes his head and says “They should have known the floor was lava”
December 15, 2024 at 4:09 PM
Jaded 5-year-old ambulance driver arrives at the scene, shakes his head and says “They should have known the floor was lava”
IT support is is sending me to a higher level technician again. I’ve started referring to them as mob, miniboss, and boss-level NPCs.
December 10, 2024 at 6:37 PM
IT support is is sending me to a higher level technician again. I’ve started referring to them as mob, miniboss, and boss-level NPCs.
Reposted by Em Says
What unfinished plot arcs should the writers of season 2024 loop back to for the season finale? Murder hornets? Something about the international space station? Given the year so far, the finale’s going off the rails, that’s for sure
December 10, 2024 at 1:08 PM
What unfinished plot arcs should the writers of season 2024 loop back to for the season finale? Murder hornets? Something about the international space station? Given the year so far, the finale’s going off the rails, that’s for sure
Reposted by Em Says
Colleague has just referred to a spreadsheet as "a spready".
December 10, 2024 at 4:11 PM
Colleague has just referred to a spreadsheet as "a spready".
Reposted by Em Says
It’s Monday- can’t we all use some shwetty balls? 😂
December 9, 2024 at 12:39 PM
It’s Monday- can’t we all use some shwetty balls? 😂
I feel the need to remove my kids from the room before I shove the christmas tree spear up the angel’s dress
November 29, 2024 at 11:13 PM
I feel the need to remove my kids from the room before I shove the christmas tree spear up the angel’s dress
Reposted by Em Says
“Well, breakfast IS the most important meal of the day,” I say to myself as I go back for a second slice of pumpkin pie
November 29, 2024 at 3:33 PM
“Well, breakfast IS the most important meal of the day,” I say to myself as I go back for a second slice of pumpkin pie
Reposted by Em Says
Imploring the kids' table to hack the planet.
November 29, 2024 at 2:05 PM
Imploring the kids' table to hack the planet.
Reposted by Em Says
just sustained multiple fractures in a stampede after trying to buy a coffee maker for my eight week old child
November 29, 2024 at 1:35 PM
just sustained multiple fractures in a stampede after trying to buy a coffee maker for my eight week old child
Reposted by Em Says
I don’t understand why people attempt to denigrate Hallmark Christmas films by referring to them as “too cheesy”, as if that is a bad thing? I mean, have you *had* cheese?
It’s not exactly the insult that you think it is.
It’s not exactly the insult that you think it is.
November 29, 2024 at 10:20 PM
I don’t understand why people attempt to denigrate Hallmark Christmas films by referring to them as “too cheesy”, as if that is a bad thing? I mean, have you *had* cheese?
It’s not exactly the insult that you think it is.
It’s not exactly the insult that you think it is.
Reposted by Em Says
Is that a banana peel in your pocket and is it there because you're in first place in Mario Kart and don't need a better power up?
November 29, 2024 at 1:47 PM
Is that a banana peel in your pocket and is it there because you're in first place in Mario Kart and don't need a better power up?
Reposted by Em Says
*flies starship to the edge of the universe*
"King me," I tell God
"King me," I tell God
November 27, 2024 at 8:36 PM
*flies starship to the edge of the universe*
"King me," I tell God
"King me," I tell God
40s but still can’t prevent my nails from looking like I worked the fields all day
November 26, 2024 at 7:16 PM
40s but still can’t prevent my nails from looking like I worked the fields all day
Reposted by Em Says
BUT GUYS
IT'LL BE FINE IN FOUR YEARS
IT'LL BE FINE IN FOUR YEARS
November 25, 2024 at 7:52 PM
BUT GUYS
IT'LL BE FINE IN FOUR YEARS
IT'LL BE FINE IN FOUR YEARS
Reposted by Em Says
I want the days when celebrities didn’t think they were politicians & politicians didn’t think they were celebrities
November 26, 2024 at 1:50 PM
I want the days when celebrities didn’t think they were politicians & politicians didn’t think they were celebrities
Reposted by Em Says
“Mayo is eggs and eggs are breakfast,” I remind myself midwesternly
November 26, 2024 at 2:43 PM
“Mayo is eggs and eggs are breakfast,” I remind myself midwesternly
Reposted by Em Says
ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to call in sick.
November 26, 2024 at 3:29 PM
ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to call in sick.
Reposted by Em Says
If a Civil War breaks out, meet me at the library.
They don’t know where, or what it is!
They don’t know where, or what it is!
November 20, 2024 at 1:10 AM
If a Civil War breaks out, meet me at the library.
They don’t know where, or what it is!
They don’t know where, or what it is!