Soren Alenko
@sorenalenko.bsky.social
The worst thing to happen to my family since the Voting Rights Act.
Reposted by Soren Alenko
MAGAZINER: How many veterans have you deported?
NOEM: We haven't deported veterans
MAGAZINER: We are now joined on Zoom by a combat veteran you deported to Korea
NOEM: We haven't deported veterans
MAGAZINER: We are now joined on Zoom by a combat veteran you deported to Korea
December 11, 2025 at 4:22 PM
MAGAZINER: How many veterans have you deported?
NOEM: We haven't deported veterans
MAGAZINER: We are now joined on Zoom by a combat veteran you deported to Korea
NOEM: We haven't deported veterans
MAGAZINER: We are now joined on Zoom by a combat veteran you deported to Korea
Regular Customer: My kid tested positive for covid this afternoon, but I certainly don’t have it!
Me: Oh, sure you don’t. *starts gargling bleach *
Me: Oh, sure you don’t. *starts gargling bleach *
December 7, 2025 at 3:30 AM
Regular Customer: My kid tested positive for covid this afternoon, but I certainly don’t have it!
Me: Oh, sure you don’t. *starts gargling bleach *
Me: Oh, sure you don’t. *starts gargling bleach *
Tree Thief: Anyone want to buy this seven foot Christmas tree? It just came from Target!
November 29, 2025 at 3:37 AM
Tree Thief: Anyone want to buy this seven foot Christmas tree? It just came from Target!
Guy with an obviously stolen jacket: Hey, you wanna help a homeless guy out and buy this jacket for $5?
Coworker: Uh, no thanks.
Guy: Motherfucking racist [slur for Hispanic people].
Coworker: Uh, no thanks.
Guy: Motherfucking racist [slur for Hispanic people].
November 29, 2025 at 3:33 AM
Guy with an obviously stolen jacket: Hey, you wanna help a homeless guy out and buy this jacket for $5?
Coworker: Uh, no thanks.
Guy: Motherfucking racist [slur for Hispanic people].
Coworker: Uh, no thanks.
Guy: Motherfucking racist [slur for Hispanic people].
Thanksgiving plans largely delayed thanks to my roommate cooking several pounds of onions in his neither tighty nor whitey underwear that had a hole over his asshole. 🤢🤮
November 28, 2025 at 4:44 AM
Thanksgiving plans largely delayed thanks to my roommate cooking several pounds of onions in his neither tighty nor whitey underwear that had a hole over his asshole. 🤢🤮
#StrangerThings5spoilers #StrangerThingsSpoilers
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Will isn’t just a sad gay boy with a bad haircut, he’s a sad gay boy with a bad haircut… that has *powers*!
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Will isn’t just a sad gay boy with a bad haircut, he’s a sad gay boy with a bad haircut… that has *powers*!
November 28, 2025 at 12:42 AM
#StrangerThings5spoilers #StrangerThingsSpoilers
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.
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Will isn’t just a sad gay boy with a bad haircut, he’s a sad gay boy with a bad haircut… that has *powers*!
.
.
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Will isn’t just a sad gay boy with a bad haircut, he’s a sad gay boy with a bad haircut… that has *powers*!
Karen Wheeler: Holly isn’t five years old you know!
Holly Wheeler meanwhile, and everything about her life:
#StrangerThings5 #StrangerThings
Holly Wheeler meanwhile, and everything about her life:
#StrangerThings5 #StrangerThings
a cartoon cat is holding a bottle and saying i 'm baby .
Alt: a cartoon cat is holding a bottle and saying i 'm baby . This is to represent how everything surrounding Holly is bright colors and things for five year olds.
media.tenor.com
November 27, 2025 at 4:23 PM
Karen Wheeler: Holly isn’t five years old you know!
Holly Wheeler meanwhile, and everything about her life:
#StrangerThings5 #StrangerThings
Holly Wheeler meanwhile, and everything about her life:
#StrangerThings5 #StrangerThings
Reposted by Soren Alenko
you fire right back at them and you FIRE RIGHT AWAY.
November 24, 2025 at 6:52 PM
you fire right back at them and you FIRE RIGHT AWAY.
Boy we endured some wild shit today.
My lunch break is ending & my coworker let me know that a customer came in to talk about what I said yesterday. The problem? I told them to have a happy Thanksgiving& they wanted to let us know that they don't celebrate "European Thanksgiving"
My lunch break is ending & my coworker let me know that a customer came in to talk about what I said yesterday. The problem? I told them to have a happy Thanksgiving& they wanted to let us know that they don't celebrate "European Thanksgiving"
November 22, 2025 at 3:55 AM
Boy we endured some wild shit today.
My lunch break is ending & my coworker let me know that a customer came in to talk about what I said yesterday. The problem? I told them to have a happy Thanksgiving& they wanted to let us know that they don't celebrate "European Thanksgiving"
My lunch break is ending & my coworker let me know that a customer came in to talk about what I said yesterday. The problem? I told them to have a happy Thanksgiving& they wanted to let us know that they don't celebrate "European Thanksgiving"
I’d like to applaud the NYPD for showing up an hour after a call was made about a group of 20+ individuals beating the shit out of two people, just to get on their squad car’s speakers to tell some random people to go home before speeding off to be more useless. #EatShit
November 15, 2025 at 2:48 PM
I’d like to applaud the NYPD for showing up an hour after a call was made about a group of 20+ individuals beating the shit out of two people, just to get on their squad car’s speakers to tell some random people to go home before speeding off to be more useless. #EatShit
#ChainsawManRezeArc review: I was more amazed by the Kaufman Theater's shiny new renovations and how there was almost zero people in the whole complex.
#ChainsawMan's first season was as a whole more cinematic and better animated than the theatrical movie.
#ChainsawMan's first season was as a whole more cinematic and better animated than the theatrical movie.
November 5, 2025 at 2:12 AM
#ChainsawManRezeArc review: I was more amazed by the Kaufman Theater's shiny new renovations and how there was almost zero people in the whole complex.
#ChainsawMan's first season was as a whole more cinematic and better animated than the theatrical movie.
#ChainsawMan's first season was as a whole more cinematic and better animated than the theatrical movie.
Maybe don’t compare the future mayor to a psychotic loon?
November 5, 2025 at 2:02 AM
Maybe don’t compare the future mayor to a psychotic loon?
Reposted by Soren Alenko
Apparently some folks are playing real dumb about skull symbols so let’s play a little game I like to call “Nazi skull or not a Nazi skull”
First up, the Jolly Roger. This is a pirate skull, not a Nazi skull. It means you might get robbed, but prolly not genocided.
With me so far? 1/x
First up, the Jolly Roger. This is a pirate skull, not a Nazi skull. It means you might get robbed, but prolly not genocided.
With me so far? 1/x
October 22, 2025 at 5:23 AM
Apparently some folks are playing real dumb about skull symbols so let’s play a little game I like to call “Nazi skull or not a Nazi skull”
First up, the Jolly Roger. This is a pirate skull, not a Nazi skull. It means you might get robbed, but prolly not genocided.
With me so far? 1/x
First up, the Jolly Roger. This is a pirate skull, not a Nazi skull. It means you might get robbed, but prolly not genocided.
With me so far? 1/x
Reposted by Soren Alenko
Me: Is super excited for #DigimonStoryTimeStranger so preorder the special edition months in advance, opt to have it delivered because of work
#GameStop : decides to cancel the order a day after it was supposed to arrive due to high demand, even though I paid in full months ago.
#GameStop : decides to cancel the order a day after it was supposed to arrive due to high demand, even though I paid in full months ago.
October 4, 2025 at 1:51 PM
Me: Is super excited for #DigimonStoryTimeStranger so preorder the special edition months in advance, opt to have it delivered because of work
#GameStop : decides to cancel the order a day after it was supposed to arrive due to high demand, even though I paid in full months ago.
#GameStop : decides to cancel the order a day after it was supposed to arrive due to high demand, even though I paid in full months ago.
Watching #MonsterTheEdGeinStory and Hitchcock is showing Anthony Perkins through Gein’s house? And we’re on a whole tangent about making Psycho? I might be done? This is only episode two?
October 4, 2025 at 3:43 AM
Watching #MonsterTheEdGeinStory and Hitchcock is showing Anthony Perkins through Gein’s house? And we’re on a whole tangent about making Psycho? I might be done? This is only episode two?
Attempted to get the shiny Koridon/Miraidon code cards from GameStop 30 min after they opened, only to be told after a 15 minute wait that they ran out of the cards earlier in the week.
They were supposed to start handing them out today. Why are Nintendo/GameFreak doing physical code cards again?
They were supposed to start handing them out today. Why are Nintendo/GameFreak doing physical code cards again?
September 26, 2025 at 7:01 PM
Attempted to get the shiny Koridon/Miraidon code cards from GameStop 30 min after they opened, only to be told after a 15 minute wait that they ran out of the cards earlier in the week.
They were supposed to start handing them out today. Why are Nintendo/GameFreak doing physical code cards again?
They were supposed to start handing them out today. Why are Nintendo/GameFreak doing physical code cards again?
Reposted by Soren Alenko
Why do we do this to ourselves, isn’t aging difficult enough as it is
Experimental post: The Inevitable March of Time
From the moment of this post, Super Mario Bros. is now closer to World War II than it is to the present day.
From the moment of this post, Super Mario Bros. is now closer to World War II than it is to the present day.
September 23, 2025 at 4:56 PM
Why do we do this to ourselves, isn’t aging difficult enough as it is
Reposted by Soren Alenko
Reporter: Do you think it would have been fitting to lower the flags for Melissa Hortman who was killed as well?
Trump: Uh, I’m not familiar, who?
Trump: Uh, I’m not familiar, who?
September 15, 2025 at 9:51 PM
Reporter: Do you think it would have been fitting to lower the flags for Melissa Hortman who was killed as well?
Trump: Uh, I’m not familiar, who?
Trump: Uh, I’m not familiar, who?
Reposted by Soren Alenko
Perfect summation.
September 16, 2025 at 2:21 PM
Perfect summation.
Reposted by Soren Alenko
Reposted by Soren Alenko
oh well, onward and upward
![REPORTER: Mr. President, my condolences to you, Sir. My condolences on the loss of your friend Charlie Kirk. [unintelligible]
How are you holding up over the last day and a half, Sir?
TRUMP: I think very good. And by the way, right there, you see all the trucks? They've just started construction of the new ballroom for the White House, which is something they ve been trying to get, as you know, for about 150 years. And it's gonna be a beauty. Absolutely magnificent construction. We just started, so it'll get done very nicely.
And it will be one of the best anywhere in the world, actually.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:cfy5rgqvohpdqxgu2geb5u2b/bafkreig42mujsiyxozvq3kiayszu47dbk6zds3icm5bwu34twt3d7vbo2q@jpeg)
September 12, 2025 at 3:22 PM
oh well, onward and upward
Reposted by Soren Alenko
Lowering the flags on 9/11 at the Guantanamo Bay McDonald's for Charlie Kirk is the most dril tweet thing that's ever happened
The flags were lowered last night around the base by order of President Trump after the killing of Charlie Kirk and will stay at half-staff on this U.S. outpost in southeast Cuba until sunset on Sunday.
September 11, 2025 at 11:31 PM
Lowering the flags on 9/11 at the Guantanamo Bay McDonald's for Charlie Kirk is the most dril tweet thing that's ever happened
Reposted by Soren Alenko
so this guy like 100% had a stroke right
September 11, 2025 at 5:52 PM
so this guy like 100% had a stroke right
Reposted by Soren Alenko
Here are some things that Charlie Kirk said in his life.
The man is dead, and so it only seems fair to share his legacy by cataloguing the values he spread while alive.
The man is dead, and so it only seems fair to share his legacy by cataloguing the values he spread while alive.
September 10, 2025 at 11:52 PM
Here are some things that Charlie Kirk said in his life.
The man is dead, and so it only seems fair to share his legacy by cataloguing the values he spread while alive.
The man is dead, and so it only seems fair to share his legacy by cataloguing the values he spread while alive.