@metricfuture.bsky.social
Pinned
Actually, this is my first rodeo. Why is that angry cow trying to stab that clown
Cows and clowns compete for resources in their natural habitat. The species' are innately adversarial and their interactions are often violent. Rodeos simply exploit this combative relationship for entertainment.
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*clears throat*
*taps mic*
I had some edits
thank you to @sbarolo.bsky.social and @ajdemas.bsky.social for their Jeremiah and Lazarus jokes which gave me the idea for this
*taps mic*
I had some edits
thank you to @sbarolo.bsky.social and @ajdemas.bsky.social for their Jeremiah and Lazarus jokes which gave me the idea for this
January 20, 2026 at 5:07 AM
*clears throat*
*taps mic*
I had some edits
thank you to @sbarolo.bsky.social and @ajdemas.bsky.social for their Jeremiah and Lazarus jokes which gave me the idea for this
*taps mic*
I had some edits
thank you to @sbarolo.bsky.social and @ajdemas.bsky.social for their Jeremiah and Lazarus jokes which gave me the idea for this
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Posting this to X, Threads, and Bluesky as an experiment
January 20, 2026 at 1:04 AM
Posting this to X, Threads, and Bluesky as an experiment
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Y’all might not appreciate it, but it took him 87 moves and 14 hours to get here
December 26, 2025 at 12:48 PM
Y’all might not appreciate it, but it took him 87 moves and 14 hours to get here
Wishing everyone a Merry Christmas / Happy Very Early Halloween
December 25, 2025 at 4:44 AM
Wishing everyone a Merry Christmas / Happy Very Early Halloween
The shops rolled out Christmas merch before November 1st this year. Per the terms of the armistice, Halloween can now deploy bats in trees.
they don’t tell you when you buy a christmas tree at the christmas tree farm that you could take it home, decorate it, and then be relaxing in your living room seven nights later when A BAT suddenly flies out and starts CRASHING AROUND YOUR HOUSE
December 25, 2025 at 2:51 AM
The shops rolled out Christmas merch before November 1st this year. Per the terms of the armistice, Halloween can now deploy bats in trees.
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I'm out here you ficuus birch
December 23, 2025 at 2:52 AM
I'm out here you ficuus birch
this baby squirrel is turning itself into a tiny fart factory for our mental health. thank you baby squirrel.
December 22, 2025 at 4:29 AM
this baby squirrel is turning itself into a tiny fart factory for our mental health. thank you baby squirrel.
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I don't know, Aaron. I think we need to take this seriously. In fact, after surveying hundreds of years of history in the past few days, I've written an article assessing the originalist case here:
papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers....
papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers....
December 16, 2025 at 3:58 AM
I don't know, Aaron. I think we need to take this seriously. In fact, after surveying hundreds of years of history in the past few days, I've written an article assessing the originalist case here:
papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers....
papers.ssrn.com/sol3/papers....
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She had dumps like a truck truck truck
December 14, 2025 at 8:57 PM
She had dumps like a truck truck truck
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Nobody. I do not think you can eat chair
December 8, 2025 at 2:02 AM
Nobody. I do not think you can eat chair
MASH in Space.
sexy teen soap set at starfleet academy? why not! they should make every type of show star trek. moody scandinavian police procedural star trek. half-hour family sitcom starring worf. vulcan columbo
🚨 BREAKING - New Star Trek: #StarfleetAcademy Poster!
The first season of the new #StarTrek live-action series premieres January 15th on Paramount+
🖖 Will YOU be watching?
The first season of the new #StarTrek live-action series premieres January 15th on Paramount+
🖖 Will YOU be watching?
December 4, 2025 at 11:15 PM
MASH in Space.
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techbros: we have created AGI
cognitive scientists: you fucked up a perfectly good spreadsheet is what you did. look at it. it's got anxiety
cognitive scientists: you fucked up a perfectly good spreadsheet is what you did. look at it. it's got anxiety
November 28, 2025 at 9:52 AM
techbros: we have created AGI
cognitive scientists: you fucked up a perfectly good spreadsheet is what you did. look at it. it's got anxiety
cognitive scientists: you fucked up a perfectly good spreadsheet is what you did. look at it. it's got anxiety
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I bring a “Tally ho!” energy to the mushroom hunt that gets old
November 25, 2025 at 2:15 PM
I bring a “Tally ho!” energy to the mushroom hunt that gets old
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“we need to be nicer to men” bro they didn’t let women have their own credit cards til 50 years ago
November 23, 2025 at 10:39 PM
“we need to be nicer to men” bro they didn’t let women have their own credit cards til 50 years ago
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“we need to be nicer to men” bro they overturned women’s constitutional right to an abortion three years ago
November 23, 2025 at 10:43 PM
“we need to be nicer to men” bro they overturned women’s constitutional right to an abortion three years ago
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imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
November 22, 2025 at 1:04 AM
imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
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Like many places these days, Scotland lets the public name their snow plows. But they take it up a notch and offer a live tracking map so you can follow Thistle Grit Through, Robert Brrrns and Ice Sweeper Willie on their rounds
www.traffic.gov.scot/gritter-trac...
www.traffic.gov.scot/gritter-trac...
November 21, 2025 at 2:48 AM
Like many places these days, Scotland lets the public name their snow plows. But they take it up a notch and offer a live tracking map so you can follow Thistle Grit Through, Robert Brrrns and Ice Sweeper Willie on their rounds
www.traffic.gov.scot/gritter-trac...
www.traffic.gov.scot/gritter-trac...
To be fair, either Keith or Olivia will probably just let it slip eventually, anyway. We're going to find out whether we want to or not.
Never Ask
A Woman, Her Age
A Man, His Salary
Keith Olberman how old Olivia Nuzzi was when they started dating.
A Woman, Her Age
A Man, His Salary
Keith Olberman how old Olivia Nuzzi was when they started dating.
November 18, 2025 at 3:25 PM
To be fair, either Keith or Olivia will probably just let it slip eventually, anyway. We're going to find out whether we want to or not.
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There should be a German word for white men who cannot conceive of possibility they'll be held accountable for their own actions.
November 7, 2025 at 12:35 AM
There should be a German word for white men who cannot conceive of possibility they'll be held accountable for their own actions.
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