jersey jonk
@jonkolnoski.bsky.social
jersey-born producer of things // co-host of the Big Knick Energy podcast // past: complex, mtv, tasty, 100 thieves & more // choose your own adventure
jonkolnoski.com
jonkolnoski.com
Reposted by jersey jonk
we gotta stop with the tiny microphones. get a full size mic like an ADULT. you look like you’re at tea with a mouse
November 9, 2025 at 1:50 AM
we gotta stop with the tiny microphones. get a full size mic like an ADULT. you look like you’re at tea with a mouse
Hot take: Despite it being AI, Trump posting a video of himself shitting all over the American people is the most honest thing the world’s biggest asshole has ever done.
October 19, 2025 at 3:39 PM
Hot take: Despite it being AI, Trump posting a video of himself shitting all over the American people is the most honest thing the world’s biggest asshole has ever done.
Reposted by jersey jonk
these people know how extreme they are
October 14, 2025 at 7:07 PM
these people know how extreme they are
Reposted by jersey jonk
today an IRL prestige cleric used an IRL magic item (not kidding) to upcast Turn Evil (not kidding) IRL on ICE and reality is so borked that it actually worked
Chicago priest Fr. Larry Dowling describes procession to ICE facility: “No one had the courage to speak directly to us. No one from Homeland Security could stand in the presence of the Monstrance holding the Blessed Sacrament. No wonder. Evil is repelled, recoils in the presence of Christ.”
October 12, 2025 at 4:43 AM
today an IRL prestige cleric used an IRL magic item (not kidding) to upcast Turn Evil (not kidding) IRL on ICE and reality is so borked that it actually worked
Honestly the worst part about the Yankees losing is that I can’t wear these in public until next year
October 9, 2025 at 9:05 PM
Honestly the worst part about the Yankees losing is that I can’t wear these in public until next year
Slack made work so much worse. Somehow collaborative Slack channels have made it worser.
October 6, 2025 at 8:20 PM
Slack made work so much worse. Somehow collaborative Slack channels have made it worser.
Reposted by jersey jonk
Many people and institutions that fight back are winning.
This is a large part of the reason to scorn the people and institutions that have caved. When this is over their lives should be made miserable. More, I mean.
This is a large part of the reason to scorn the people and institutions that have caved. When this is over their lives should be made miserable. More, I mean.
Kimmel won. Winning matters, wins are how we’re going to prevent this autocratic slide.
September 27, 2025 at 3:53 AM
Many people and institutions that fight back are winning.
This is a large part of the reason to scorn the people and institutions that have caved. When this is over their lives should be made miserable. More, I mean.
This is a large part of the reason to scorn the people and institutions that have caved. When this is over their lives should be made miserable. More, I mean.
Reposted by jersey jonk
I’m sorry, the statistical likelihood that Nate Silver wrote one of the most absurd things you’ve ever read is only 97%, and it is impossible for my model to be proved wrong under any circumstances, due to science
You both and Nate Silver. Wait, no, Silver wrote one of the most absurd things I've ever read
September 19, 2025 at 7:32 PM
I’m sorry, the statistical likelihood that Nate Silver wrote one of the most absurd things you’ve ever read is only 97%, and it is impossible for my model to be proved wrong under any circumstances, due to science
Reposted by jersey jonk
a key reason they see an opening for such a blatant speech crackdown is that they already did one to Palestinian and anti-genocide activists and it got enthusiastic bipartisan approval
September 18, 2025 at 2:21 AM
a key reason they see an opening for such a blatant speech crackdown is that they already did one to Palestinian and anti-genocide activists and it got enthusiastic bipartisan approval
Lost count of how many LinkedIn posts about “Calvin Klein” I’ve reported as hate speech.
September 17, 2025 at 12:04 AM
Lost count of how many LinkedIn posts about “Calvin Klein” I’ve reported as hate speech.
Reposted by jersey jonk
Got a new story in The Ringer today.
You have encountered Steelers exceptionalism a million times. It's the belief that the Pittsburgh NFL team is football's one indispensable franchise and somehow different from the other 31.
It's also about to come crashing down www.theringer.com/2025/09/02/n...
You have encountered Steelers exceptionalism a million times. It's the belief that the Pittsburgh NFL team is football's one indispensable franchise and somehow different from the other 31.
It's also about to come crashing down www.theringer.com/2025/09/02/n...
The Last Gasp of Steelers Exceptionalism
Pittsburgh has long acted like it’s better than its NFL peers. As the Aaron Rodgers era begins, will Mike Tomlin’s team be anything more than average?
www.theringer.com
September 2, 2025 at 1:28 PM
Got a new story in The Ringer today.
You have encountered Steelers exceptionalism a million times. It's the belief that the Pittsburgh NFL team is football's one indispensable franchise and somehow different from the other 31.
It's also about to come crashing down www.theringer.com/2025/09/02/n...
You have encountered Steelers exceptionalism a million times. It's the belief that the Pittsburgh NFL team is football's one indispensable franchise and somehow different from the other 31.
It's also about to come crashing down www.theringer.com/2025/09/02/n...
Reposted by jersey jonk
Wow! (Translation: This was such a great series by @justinsayles.bsky.social, and I’m thrilled there’s another chapter, which I’ll be queuing up momentarily.)
Wedding Scammer back with a big update: We have an arrest.
That means we also have an epilogue.
Chapter 8: The Arrest, out now. The end, hopefully.
open.spotify.com/episode/4snL...
That means we also have an epilogue.
Chapter 8: The Arrest, out now. The end, hopefully.
open.spotify.com/episode/4snL...
8. The Arrest
Spotify video
open.spotify.com
September 2, 2025 at 2:20 PM
Wow! (Translation: This was such a great series by @justinsayles.bsky.social, and I’m thrilled there’s another chapter, which I’ll be queuing up momentarily.)
You know he’s dead or close to it because this is the quietest stretch of days we’ve had basically since he “got shot”
September 1, 2025 at 6:03 AM
You know he’s dead or close to it because this is the quietest stretch of days we’ve had basically since he “got shot”
Reposted by jersey jonk
Remember when Herman Cain was tweeting two weeks after he died..?
Herman Cain 'tweets' two weeks after his death to attack Democrats
Twitter account belonging to Cain, who died in July from coronavirus aged 74, revived to spread pro-Trump messages
www.theguardian.com
August 30, 2025 at 9:12 AM
Remember when Herman Cain was tweeting two weeks after he died..?
Nothing has ever tested my Twitter quitting resolve quite like tonight
August 30, 2025 at 6:05 AM
Nothing has ever tested my Twitter quitting resolve quite like tonight
Feverishly refreshing Bluesky dot com
August 30, 2025 at 5:56 AM
Feverishly refreshing Bluesky dot com
Reposted by jersey jonk
He’s finally united the country
August 30, 2025 at 2:26 AM
He’s finally united the country
It was January 6th, and everything specifically related to its aftermath.
The precise moment when and where in recent weeks America crossed that invisible line from democracy into authoritarianism can and will be debated by future historians, but it’s clear that the line itself has been crossed. www.doomsdayscenario.co/p/america-ti...
America Tips Into Fascism
Today is different than before.
www.doomsdayscenario.co
August 26, 2025 at 12:45 AM
It was January 6th, and everything specifically related to its aftermath.
Reposted by jersey jonk
And while the right wing story was constantly changing, the police report and the story from the teenagers both remained consistent. The teenagers say that big balls was harassing and trying to pick up the 15-year-old girl, and when he wouldn't leave her alone the boy jumped in to defend her.
Judge Releases Teens Charged in ‘Big Balls’ Assault in Blow to Trump
The case caught the attention of Donald Trump.
www.thedailybeast.com
August 22, 2025 at 2:13 PM
And while the right wing story was constantly changing, the police report and the story from the teenagers both remained consistent. The teenagers say that big balls was harassing and trying to pick up the 15-year-old girl, and when he wouldn't leave her alone the boy jumped in to defend her.
Has anyone called the green dildo “The cock seen ‘round the world” yet?
July 30, 2025 at 4:09 PM
Has anyone called the green dildo “The cock seen ‘round the world” yet?
Reposted by jersey jonk
Let’s not forget that a large part of what it used to mean to be Middle Class was that your taxes paid for improvements to the lives and communities around you, including your own, they didn’t just get funneled straight into billionaires’ pockets
July 28, 2025 at 3:28 PM
Let’s not forget that a large part of what it used to mean to be Middle Class was that your taxes paid for improvements to the lives and communities around you, including your own, they didn’t just get funneled straight into billionaires’ pockets
Reposted by jersey jonk
One of my subscribers saw this at 55th and 7th in Manhattan.
Editor: You get those logos of the New York sports teams for the coffee and donut poster?
Photographer: Sure did boss, real fuckin misleading, just like you asked.
Editor: what
Editor: You get those logos of the New York sports teams for the coffee and donut poster?
Photographer: Sure did boss, real fuckin misleading, just like you asked.
Editor: what
July 22, 2025 at 5:21 PM
One of my subscribers saw this at 55th and 7th in Manhattan.
Editor: You get those logos of the New York sports teams for the coffee and donut poster?
Photographer: Sure did boss, real fuckin misleading, just like you asked.
Editor: what
Editor: You get those logos of the New York sports teams for the coffee and donut poster?
Photographer: Sure did boss, real fuckin misleading, just like you asked.
Editor: what
I’ve disregarded what I was, now that I’m older.
July 18, 2025 at 3:09 PM
I’ve disregarded what I was, now that I’m older.
Reposted by jersey jonk
There are only three political positions in America today
1) I like the fascism
2) I'll acquiesce to the fascism (reasons for this one vary: cowardice, access, denial, misguidedly thinking that acquiescence is savvy, etc)
3) I oppose the fascism
The rest is details
1) I like the fascism
2) I'll acquiesce to the fascism (reasons for this one vary: cowardice, access, denial, misguidedly thinking that acquiescence is savvy, etc)
3) I oppose the fascism
The rest is details
June 28, 2025 at 6:10 PM
There are only three political positions in America today
1) I like the fascism
2) I'll acquiesce to the fascism (reasons for this one vary: cowardice, access, denial, misguidedly thinking that acquiescence is savvy, etc)
3) I oppose the fascism
The rest is details
1) I like the fascism
2) I'll acquiesce to the fascism (reasons for this one vary: cowardice, access, denial, misguidedly thinking that acquiescence is savvy, etc)
3) I oppose the fascism
The rest is details
You ever just sit and think about how insane it is that they never made a Mary Poppins 2? Like then, with the original cast. The Emily Blunt one doesn’t count.
June 23, 2025 at 2:43 PM
You ever just sit and think about how insane it is that they never made a Mary Poppins 2? Like then, with the original cast. The Emily Blunt one doesn’t count.