"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified)
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ipsumlorem.bsky.social
"Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified)
@ipsumlorem.bsky.social
My posts are enjoyed* by literally dozens of people worldwide.
*delete as applicable.

pro-trans rights. Crab Verified 2025-04-23

"Kind of Slime" - (Graham Linehan, 17.08.23)

"waste of a good user name" - some random trolling me

🦀
Pinned
Bsky Elder status confirmed ; I came here when it was invite only!
What's that you say? The founder and head of Blackwater, the mercenary megacorp, has been 'detained' in the DRC by an armed group?
February 10, 2026 at 7:00 AM
Elon sending people to live in Swindon in a nuclear-powered moonbase? What could possibly go wrong?
February 10, 2026 at 6:56 AM
This social media post will delete itself shortly for tax write-off purposes. I'd actually watch the heck out of this. Esp if it wasn't made by *ahem* Warners.

*DELETES SOCIAL MEDIA POST FOR TAX WRITE-OFF PURPOSES*

NB. This is an advertisement sponsored by Warner Bros.
February 10, 2026 at 3:27 AM
Reposted by "Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified)
February 9, 2026 at 1:38 PM
I wrote this three years ago, and I still stand by every word of it.
February 10, 2026 at 2:16 AM
February 10th is , apparently, World Pizza Day.

Look, EVERYDAY is Pizza Day where I live. K?
February 10, 2026 at 1:52 AM
*reads the internet again*

I'm STILL extremely disappointed in the lot of you, y'know.

So there. Mnerr.
February 10, 2026 at 1:48 AM
Reposted by "Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified)
The moment it dawns on him that he's shot himself in the metaphorical foot will be glorious.
a man says " shut up wesley " in front of a man in a mask
ALT: a man says " shut up wesley " in front of a man in a mask
media.tenor.com
February 9, 2026 at 11:55 PM
"From the realisation that all we've been left behind,
is to stand like our fathers before us in the firing line
waiting for the whistle to blow
we stand here waiting for the whistle to blow
they promised us miracles
and the whistle still blows...."

marillionations.blogspot.com/1987/06/slai...
Slàinte Mhath
Explanations of Song Elements from Marillion Songs - unpacking literary, political, historical, British and other song references from the lyrics.
marillionations.blogspot.com
February 10, 2026 at 12:16 AM
I remember the 2000s much more than I'd like to.

Mostly the chaos, the homelessness, the emotional damage, the hair loss, the physical assaults from the ex, the financial abuse.... the trauma that came from not knowing where i was sleeping that night

Yeah, some of that time was a bit rubbish.
February 9, 2026 at 11:53 PM
In order to remove any ambiguity and to be explicitly clear - when I write something and put it up here, I write precisely what gets across what I'm trying to say. No subtext. No implicit meaning.

Reading stuff into it things I never said and that was never there in the 1st place helps no-one.
February 9, 2026 at 11:06 PM
I've read the internet again today, and I must say I am extremely disappointed in the lot of you.

so there.
February 9, 2026 at 10:42 PM
"Tell me you love both LEGO and Space1999 without telling me you love both LEGO and Space1999....."
February 9, 2026 at 9:46 PM
Everytime I use the self serve in Poundland, I am always disappointed it doesn't say this when asking me if i want a receipt...
February 9, 2026 at 9:43 PM
y'know, seeing things like this don't make me think I should trust AI summaries of things. Y'know?
February 9, 2026 at 9:04 PM
"Oh, me and Mandelsohn? Nah, we were never close"....

Wes Streeting , as someone who says he is a Christian, is lying so much his head is spinning like Linda Blair in The Exorcist.
February 9, 2026 at 8:34 PM
Reposted by "Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified)
Anyway, enjoy the World Cup!
In Boston ICE randomly pulled over this huge white Irish guy with a Mass drivers license, 20 years in the states, legal status, pending green card and have held him for 5 months, his citizen wife paid a $4k bond that was ignored(!) ICE forged his signature on deportation agreement, no appeal
Kerryman who is married, living and working legally in the United States for >20 years has been incarcerated by US Immigration and Customs Enforcement (Ice) since September 2025.

Profoundly disturbing report by Karlin Lillington @klillington.bsky.social
www.irishtimes.com/world/us/202...
February 9, 2026 at 7:38 PM
I wasn't joking about the Hare Krishnas turning up in Airport 1975.

"Welcome to the Church Of Disaster Movie Consciousness. Services are held at the Irwin Allen SS Poseidon Memorial Center for all those who lost their lives during his box-office run..."
February 9, 2026 at 7:49 PM
Watching Airport 1975, starring Ben Stiller's Dad, Erik Estrada from CHiPs (as an absolute horndog) & a fictional airline.

Its basically Airplane . the patient in need of an urgent transplant, a singing nun, hare krishnas... but you know what it is missing?

I can't tell you that! Its classified!
February 9, 2026 at 7:16 PM
KFC Double Deal + KFC Gravy Box
= The most epically HUGE best dirty chicken meal of all time.

2 x Fillet Burgers,
1 x Chicken,
1 x Mini Fillet,
2 x Hot Wings,
Large Fries,
800ml drink + Gravy

= ALL THE CALORIES.
February 9, 2026 at 6:48 PM
Post a banger that's not in English

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rm0A...
February 9, 2026 at 6:41 PM
And as we all know, Proof by anecdote wins every time!

<inser="joe-Rogan-talking-about-ivermectin.jpg">
Damn, I guess all those statistics must be wrong then.
February 9, 2026 at 6:39 PM
www.discogs.com/release/3171...

50p for an exclusive REM track? I'll take that!
Various - Songs For Japan
View credits, reviews, tracks and shop for the 2011 CD release of "Songs For Japan" on Discogs.
www.discogs.com
February 9, 2026 at 6:35 PM
From an academic paper on spree-killings in the Americas.
February 9, 2026 at 6:30 PM
Reposted by "Hi, I'm Graham off the Internet" 🔞🦀 (Crab Verified)
Look all I'm saying is we've tried chaos *without* Ed Miliband
February 9, 2026 at 2:51 PM