Ellis Weiner
@ellisw.bsky.social
Humorist, novelist, ghost writer, drummer, maker of self-descriptive lists.
Look, no one need take "eat the rich" literally. It also includes putting some of the rich into the freezer for future use.
February 9, 2026 at 10:03 PM
Look, no one need take "eat the rich" literally. It also includes putting some of the rich into the freezer for future use.
Maybe. But no amount of apologies for being JD Vance will be sufficient.
February 8, 2026 at 7:47 PM
Maybe. But no amount of apologies for being JD Vance will be sufficient.
This is a scream. You never see these characters yelling at each other and interrupting each other. Frank Oz is particularly fantastic.
This is so delightful
While I don’t know if any Muppets break the second fourth wall on Television or Movies …
There is this one camera test where Kermit and Fozzie ad lib being abstract entities …
There is this one camera test where Kermit and Fozzie ad lib being abstract entities …
February 8, 2026 at 4:35 PM
This is a scream. You never see these characters yelling at each other and interrupting each other. Frank Oz is particularly fantastic.
Hear hear.
SCOTUS has lacked legitimacy at least since Bush v Gore. I reviewed 4 books collecting law review writings about it at the time & NOT ONE defended the decision (though a couple defended the outcome--itself a tell). The public was shielded from this, but it was clear as day then, all the moreso now.
People are mad at @samuelmoyn.bsky.social but this is a good piece from him and @ryandoerfler.bsky.social on need to accept that SCOTUS has become functionally illegitimate. Key point is legitimacy does require the public to think the court operates in good faith:
www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...
www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...
February 8, 2026 at 3:49 PM
Hear hear.
From Steve Radlauer, co-author of THE SPLIT:
Joke I saw yesterday: A couple of years from now. A guy’s got a booth in Times Square with a sign saying “Piss on Trumps’s Grave, $10.” Customer steps up, says, “I’ll buy a ticket.”
1/2
Joke I saw yesterday: A couple of years from now. A guy’s got a booth in Times Square with a sign saying “Piss on Trumps’s Grave, $10.” Customer steps up, says, “I’ll buy a ticket.”
1/2
February 7, 2026 at 11:05 PM
From Steve Radlauer, co-author of THE SPLIT:
Joke I saw yesterday: A couple of years from now. A guy’s got a booth in Times Square with a sign saying “Piss on Trumps’s Grave, $10.” Customer steps up, says, “I’ll buy a ticket.”
1/2
Joke I saw yesterday: A couple of years from now. A guy’s got a booth in Times Square with a sign saying “Piss on Trumps’s Grave, $10.” Customer steps up, says, “I’ll buy a ticket.”
1/2
Reposted by Ellis Weiner
Interesting signage spotted in LA this weekend
February 7, 2026 at 9:01 PM
Interesting signage spotted in LA this weekend
It's hard to read but worth the effort. A Jabberwocky for our time.
February 6, 2026 at 1:39 AM
It's hard to read but worth the effort. A Jabberwocky for our time.
Reposted by Ellis Weiner
Never forget: Pam Bondi and Kash said there was nothing in the Epstein files back in March
February 4, 2026 at 12:11 AM
Never forget: Pam Bondi and Kash said there was nothing in the Epstein files back in March
This describes an orgy of illegality, committed by thugs for money, to please ghouls like Miller and Noem.
And Chuck Schumer wants to solve this with body cams, no masks, and training.
And Chuck Schumer wants to solve this with body cams, no masks, and training.
Chris Murphy names the harm plainly: ICE is inflicting trauma and violence—Minneapolis to Texas, block by block. Families terrorized. Communities destabilized. This happens by design and by funding. Congress can stop feeding it today.
#FundHealthcareOverICE
#USDemocracy
#Pinks
#FundHealthcareOverICE
#USDemocracy
#Pinks
February 4, 2026 at 12:35 AM
This describes an orgy of illegality, committed by thugs for money, to please ghouls like Miller and Noem.
And Chuck Schumer wants to solve this with body cams, no masks, and training.
And Chuck Schumer wants to solve this with body cams, no masks, and training.
I was just in a hipster coffee shop and all the woke libs were saying that Nick Adams is one of the biggest assholes in the known universe.
Of all the things in the history of the world that definitely did not happen - this is the pinnacle.
February 3, 2026 at 2:08 AM
I was just in a hipster coffee shop and all the woke libs were saying that Nick Adams is one of the biggest assholes in the known universe.
Oh, well, then. If they don't have any vidoes of it, it must not have taken place. So all this stalling, lying, redacting, evading, and denying was unnecessary. Whew!
MAGA Republicans don’t consider child rape “improper” so
INGRAHAM: Are there videos that you all have?
BLANCHE: Not of any individuals, men, having improper sex or anything with victims.
BLANCHE: Not of any individuals, men, having improper sex or anything with victims.
February 3, 2026 at 1:18 AM
Oh, well, then. If they don't have any vidoes of it, it must not have taken place. So all this stalling, lying, redacting, evading, and denying was unnecessary. Whew!
Ni-i-i-i-ce.
Judge Reyes’s conclusion: “There is an old adage among lawyers. If you have the facts on your side, pound the facts. If you have the law on your side, pound the law. If you have neither, pound the table. … Having neither and bringing the adage into the 21st century, [Noem] pounds X (f/k/a Twitter).”
February 3, 2026 at 1:10 AM
Ni-i-i-i-ce.
Reposted by Ellis Weiner
All the stars are here: Brantley Gilbert, Brice Bradley, Gabby Babby, Bibb Glibsy, Slab Gabbert, Brice Bryce,
Turning Point USA has announced the performers for their alternative Super Bowl halftime show:
Kid Rock, Brantley Gilbert, Lee Brice, and Gabby Barrett
Kid Rock, Brantley Gilbert, Lee Brice, and Gabby Barrett
February 2, 2026 at 6:54 PM
All the stars are here: Brantley Gilbert, Brice Bradley, Gabby Babby, Bibb Glibsy, Slab Gabbert, Brice Bryce,
Right.
February 2, 2026 at 1:37 AM
Right.
Reposted by Ellis Weiner
February 2, 2026 at 1:18 AM
Reposted by Ellis Weiner
February 2, 2026 at 1:07 AM
Reposted by Ellis Weiner
Jeffrey Dahmer: No one ever wants to talk about the people I didn't eat.
Kristi Noem: "I always tell people that the days you don't hear about us are the days we were successful."
February 2, 2026 at 1:25 AM
Jeffrey Dahmer: No one ever wants to talk about the people I didn't eat.
I would like it if every Dem in Congress said to every Republican: "He defends the obviously lawless ICE. He's robbing us blind. He wants to destroy NATO. He's going to turn the Kennedy Center into a casino. What does he have to do to get you, at long last, to turn on him?" And post the answers.
February 2, 2026 at 1:16 AM
I would like it if every Dem in Congress said to every Republican: "He defends the obviously lawless ICE. He's robbing us blind. He wants to destroy NATO. He's going to turn the Kennedy Center into a casino. What does he have to do to get you, at long last, to turn on him?" And post the answers.
Well, when you put it THAT way...
So, just this weekend at Thr Trump Memorial Kennedy Center:
-Movie lost $32,000,0000
-Building closed the next day
-Great job everybody
-Movie lost $32,000,0000
-Building closed the next day
-Great job everybody
February 2, 2026 at 1:13 AM
Well, when you put it THAT way...
Reposted by Ellis Weiner
"...and totally subject to Board approval." Well there's that, at least.
The Kennedy Center was a vital hub in DC arts. Trump is closing it to avoid the ongoing embarrassment of "Melania" like turnout for the few acts willing to perform there.
Trump: "I have determined that the fastest way to bring The Trump Kennedy Center to the highest level of Success, Beauty, and Grandeur, is to cease Entertainment Operations for an approximately two year period of time, with a scheduled Grand Reopening that will rival and surpass anything."
February 1, 2026 at 11:54 PM
"...and totally subject to Board approval." Well there's that, at least.
Reposted by Ellis Weiner
Please CHRIST look at the UK; Starmer’s Labour didn’t win the last election; the Conservatives lost it. The thing to do is to *BURN AWAY* Schumer, Jeffries et al through direct action, protests, primaries. You and I are in charge (sorry! but also: congrats!) Catch up with us, Dems, or be retired.
the thing is, the way it looks right now democrats are going to do really well even by default. dont have to go on record promising anything, dont need to be bold, dont need to put themselves out there and theyll probably get control
thats just not good enough
thats just not good enough
February 1, 2026 at 2:16 PM
Please CHRIST look at the UK; Starmer’s Labour didn’t win the last election; the Conservatives lost it. The thing to do is to *BURN AWAY* Schumer, Jeffries et al through direct action, protests, primaries. You and I are in charge (sorry! but also: congrats!) Catch up with us, Dems, or be retired.
Reposted by Ellis Weiner
Reposted by Ellis Weiner
I don't like to talk about stories before they are fully reported, but I am writing on ICE in a Minnesota town that isn't Minneapolis. However bad you think it is, it is worse. It is a campaign of pure terror whose only strategic goal is more terror. There is no strategy other than to break people.
January 31, 2026 at 9:03 PM
I don't like to talk about stories before they are fully reported, but I am writing on ICE in a Minnesota town that isn't Minneapolis. However bad you think it is, it is worse. It is a campaign of pure terror whose only strategic goal is more terror. There is no strategy other than to break people.