Gary Legum
@glegum.bsky.social
Writer. Mope. I don't know what the hell you're talking about, Lucy, and I want you to shut up.
Excellent speech sir, you sold the "ehnnnkkk uhhhh huuuuuu" very powerfully.
January 6, 2026 at 3:45 PM
Excellent speech sir, you sold the "ehnnnkkk uhhhh huuuuuu" very powerfully.
It probably says nothing good about my humanity that my first thought was "Cool, Mike Johnson's margin is even narrower."
From the AP:
"Republican Doug LaMalfa, a seven-term U.S. representative from California, has died, GOP officials said Tuesday.
His death reduces the Republicans’ already narrow control of the House to 218 seats to Democrats’ 213."
apnews.com/article/rep-...
"Republican Doug LaMalfa, a seven-term U.S. representative from California, has died, GOP officials said Tuesday.
His death reduces the Republicans’ already narrow control of the House to 218 seats to Democrats’ 213."
apnews.com/article/rep-...
Rep. Doug LaMalfa of California dies, reducing GOP's narrow control of the House to 218-213
Republican seven-term U.S. congressman Doug LaMalfa of California has died, reducing the GOP's already narrow control of the House.
apnews.com
January 6, 2026 at 3:40 PM
It probably says nothing good about my humanity that my first thought was "Cool, Mike Johnson's margin is even narrower."
Probably slipped on the stairs in my house, fell on my ass, slid down feet-first until my foot hit a newel post and fractured my pinky toe. But at least it stopped my slide.
What's the most ridiculous way you ever hurt yourself? I got out of the tub, skidded in water and tripped over the toilet. Ankle sprain.
😅
😅
January 6, 2026 at 2:00 AM
Probably slipped on the stairs in my house, fell on my ass, slid down feet-first until my foot hit a newel post and fractured my pinky toe. But at least it stopped my slide.
"If it's about laying off the insanity peppers, I'm way ahead of you" is one of those Simpsons lines that lives forever in my brain.
29 years ago today, Homer Simpson had an epic chili pepper-induced hallucination. “El Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Jomer” first aired January 5, 1997.
Most of the sequence was animated completely by David Silverman as he wanted it to look exactly as he had imagined it.
Most of the sequence was animated completely by David Silverman as he wanted it to look exactly as he had imagined it.
January 6, 2026 at 1:30 AM
"If it's about laying off the insanity peppers, I'm way ahead of you" is one of those Simpsons lines that lives forever in my brain.
By what right? Well, Norwegians led by Erik the Red settled Greenland in 986. Then, later, Norway and Denmark combined to become a union that lasted for a few centuries. When they separated in 1814, Norway ceded Greenland to Denmark. There's more, but that basically catches us up.
TAPPER: Can you rule out the US is going to take Greenland by force?
MILLER: Greenland should be part of the US. By what right does Denmark assert control over Greenland? The US is the power of NATO
T: So force is on the table?
M: Nobody is gonna fight the US militarily over future of Greenland
MILLER: Greenland should be part of the US. By what right does Denmark assert control over Greenland? The US is the power of NATO
T: So force is on the table?
M: Nobody is gonna fight the US militarily over future of Greenland
January 5, 2026 at 11:49 PM
By what right? Well, Norwegians led by Erik the Red settled Greenland in 986. Then, later, Norway and Denmark combined to become a union that lasted for a few centuries. When they separated in 1814, Norway ceded Greenland to Denmark. There's more, but that basically catches us up.
I definitely prefer this to affordable health insurance. Thank you, President Trump!
TRUMP: MAY SUBSIDIZE OIL COMPANIES REBUILDING IN VENEZUELA: NBC
January 5, 2026 at 11:21 PM
I definitely prefer this to affordable health insurance. Thank you, President Trump!
There is a long history of Nazis becoming players in South American governments.
Don't worry, they're considering putting Stephen Miller in charge....
www.washingtonpost.com/national-sec...
www.washingtonpost.com/national-sec...
January 5, 2026 at 3:34 AM
There is a long history of Nazis becoming players in South American governments.
The Steelers haven't had a QB who could push the ball down the field since Roethlisberger was in his prime. It's sad to watch. Which is why I've mostly stopped watching.
Because Rodgers so rarely pushes the ball downfield (outside of go ball prayers), every PIT series basically comes down to: Can the defense make a three tackles.
January 5, 2026 at 2:09 AM
The Steelers haven't had a QB who could push the ball down the field since Roethlisberger was in his prime. It's sad to watch. Which is why I've mostly stopped watching.
One very bad result of this raid is that Trump is feeling invincible.
Trump: "We need Greenland from a national security situation. It's so strategic. Right now, Greenland is covered with Russian and Chinese ships all over the place. We need Greenland from the standpoint of national security. And Denmark is not gonna be able to do it ... the EU needs us to have it"
January 5, 2026 at 2:07 AM
One very bad result of this raid is that Trump is feeling invincible.
So Maduro's vice president found a way to 25th Amendment him, which Trump would take a lesson from if he had two brain cells to rub together.
And lo and behold, from the Miami Herald about how Rodriguez pulled off her coup and played Trump for a fool.
This also explains why Marco Rubio looks like such an ignorant, flailing little bitch right now. Because he is.
www.miamiherald.com/news/nation-...
This also explains why Marco Rubio looks like such an ignorant, flailing little bitch right now. Because he is.
www.miamiherald.com/news/nation-...
January 4, 2026 at 10:46 PM
So Maduro's vice president found a way to 25th Amendment him, which Trump would take a lesson from if he had two brain cells to rub together.
I mean, isn't every SWAT team in America supported with attack helicopters and cruise missiles?
STEPHANOPOULOS: Why wasn't congressional authorization necessary?
RUBIO: It wasn't necessary because this was not an invasion. We didn't occupy a country. This was an arrest operation.
RUBIO: It wasn't necessary because this was not an invasion. We didn't occupy a country. This was an arrest operation.
January 4, 2026 at 9:45 PM
I mean, isn't every SWAT team in America supported with attack helicopters and cruise missiles?
*debating whether to eat a gummy at noon on Sunday to calm my overwhelming desire to punch Marco Rubio in the dick* I WILL RETAIN OPTIONALITY.
BRENNAN: To be clear, there is no plan for US occupation of this country of nearly 30 million people?
MARCO RUBIO: The president always retains optionality on anything and on all of these matters
MARCO RUBIO: The president always retains optionality on anything and on all of these matters
January 4, 2026 at 5:12 PM
*debating whether to eat a gummy at noon on Sunday to calm my overwhelming desire to punch Marco Rubio in the dick* I WILL RETAIN OPTIONALITY.
I've started to wonder if Rubio thinks he's showing appropriate gravitas for a SoS and is missing the mark by several thousand light-years.
One thing I’m struck by is how just plain unhappy Marco Rubio looks in every picture or interview. At least Hegseth looks like he’s having fun cos-playing “Secretary of War”; Rubio seemingly hates every moment of his life, even moments like this that are huge policy triumphs for him.
Marco Rubio on comparisons between Venezuela and Iraq: "People need to stop describing the apples of the Middle East to the oranges of the Western Hemisphere
January 4, 2026 at 3:54 PM
I've started to wonder if Rubio thinks he's showing appropriate gravitas for a SoS and is missing the mark by several thousand light-years.
Good god.
From the perspective of reporting the news, it doesn’t strike me that there is a functional difference between a president who answers the phone at 4:30am in the morning but doesn’t answer a reporter’s questions, versus a president who doesn’t agreed to be interviewed.
January 4, 2026 at 3:39 PM
Good god.
"Compliant." Apparently he expects Venezuela to be a vassal state.
Marco Rubio: "It had to be done. And it's been done. And I assure you the people left behind in Venezuela now that are in charge of the police and everything else, I assure you they are gonna probably be a lot more compliant than Maduro was as a result of this."
January 4, 2026 at 3:31 PM
"Compliant." Apparently he expects Venezuela to be a vassal state.
He's totally going to do that, isn't he.
Well, sure, Venezuela has a real government and the US occupies 0% of the country but once Trump posts a notice dissolving the military everything will go smoothly.
January 4, 2026 at 4:28 AM
He's totally going to do that, isn't he.
It's not distracting. I'm mad about all of it, because I'm an adult and can hold more than one thought at a time in my head.
Schumer: "It makes you think that maybe to Trump he wants to distract the American people, as he always does, from the skyrocketing costs they are facing, from the Epstein files."
January 4, 2026 at 4:25 AM
It's not distracting. I'm mad about all of it, because I'm an adult and can hold more than one thought at a time in my head.
This is a really important moment for moral clarity, let's see how Democratic leadership is resp--oh.
My full statement on the Trump Administration’s military actions in Venezuela:
January 3, 2026 at 6:51 PM
This is a really important moment for moral clarity, let's see how Democratic leadership is resp--oh.
Man, she sucked up to him so, so hard when she won the Nobel. Dignity wraithing remains undefeated.
Trump on María Corina Machado: "I think it'd be very tough for her to be the leader. She doesn't have the support or the respect within the country. She's a very nice woman but she doesn't have the respect."
January 3, 2026 at 6:16 PM
Man, she sucked up to him so, so hard when she won the Nobel. Dignity wraithing remains undefeated.
rachael bad, imo
January 3, 2026 at 5:56 PM
rachael bad, imo
"And only I'm allowed to do that."
“I’m not thrilled with Putin, I’m not thrilled with him. He’s killing too many people,” President Trump just now.
January 3, 2026 at 5:51 PM
"And only I'm allowed to do that."
And it's this sort of caricature that was a large part of why people/politicians/media didn't take the anti-war left seriously in 2002-3. Now here's the president not even bothering with the "promotion of democracy" bullshit fig leaf.
A college sophomore at an Occupy rally could not have generated such a grotesque outsized caricature of US imperialism
Trump: "We're going to have our very large United States oil companies go in, spend billions of dollars, fix the badly broken infrastructure and start making money for the country. And we are ready to stage a second and much larger attack if we need to do so."
January 3, 2026 at 5:30 PM
And it's this sort of caricature that was a large part of why people/politicians/media didn't take the anti-war left seriously in 2002-3. Now here's the president not even bothering with the "promotion of democracy" bullshit fig leaf.
How's everyone who spent years saying Trump wouldn't get us into stupid regime change wars doing today? Wracked with self-loathing, I hope?
Trump on Venezuela: "We're going to run the country until such time as we can do a safe, proper, and judicious transition"
January 3, 2026 at 5:07 PM
How's everyone who spent years saying Trump wouldn't get us into stupid regime change wars doing today? Wracked with self-loathing, I hope?
Peter Hegseth tapping his breakfast keg with a little extra enthusiasm this morning.
January 3, 2026 at 3:39 PM
Peter Hegseth tapping his breakfast keg with a little extra enthusiasm this morning.