Doofenschmirtz
@doofenctaig.bsky.social
Perry the Platypus?! You're here just in time! #Exvangelical #Athiest #Liberal #GoHawks
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
NOTICE FROM THE MEME WAREHOUSE:
"Due to this ridiculous government statement, we are currently out of stock of 'Sure, Jan' memes. We will notify you when new stock arrives. Thank you for your patience."
"Due to this ridiculous government statement, we are currently out of stock of 'Sure, Jan' memes. We will notify you when new stock arrives. Thank you for your patience."
federal officials are now claiming that Jonathan Ross, the ICE agent who killed Renee Good, "suffered internal bleeding"
ICE agent involved in shooting of Renee Good suffered internal bleeding, officials claim
abcnews.go.com
January 14, 2026 at 10:30 PM
NOTICE FROM THE MEME WAREHOUSE:
"Due to this ridiculous government statement, we are currently out of stock of 'Sure, Jan' memes. We will notify you when new stock arrives. Thank you for your patience."
"Due to this ridiculous government statement, we are currently out of stock of 'Sure, Jan' memes. We will notify you when new stock arrives. Thank you for your patience."
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Healthcare must be expensive in the US.They have a President in desperate and urgent need of help but they rather have the country and the planet go to pots before they give him the help he needs.It obviously can't be cured but one can give him some quality of life in his last days. A farm? Upstate?
January 12, 2026 at 2:14 PM
Healthcare must be expensive in the US.They have a President in desperate and urgent need of help but they rather have the country and the planet go to pots before they give him the help he needs.It obviously can't be cured but one can give him some quality of life in his last days. A farm? Upstate?
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
And I’m gonna "like" this post every day so nobody forgets exactly who Pedophile Trump is and why the Epstein files have suddenly disappeared. 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
#Justice4theVictims_NOW
#Justice4theVictims_NOW
🔥🔥🔥 DO NOT BE DISTRACTED BY MADURO & STAY LOUD!!
🔥🔥🔥 DONALD TRUMP IS GOING DOWN!!
TRUMP & EPSTEIN ARE SEX TRAFFICKERS!!! I’m gonna post this every day so nobody forgets exactly who Pedophile Trump is and why the Epstein files have suddenly disappeared. 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
🔥🔥🔥 DONALD TRUMP IS GOING DOWN!!
TRUMP & EPSTEIN ARE SEX TRAFFICKERS!!! I’m gonna post this every day so nobody forgets exactly who Pedophile Trump is and why the Epstein files have suddenly disappeared. 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
January 11, 2026 at 8:50 PM
And I’m gonna "like" this post every day so nobody forgets exactly who Pedophile Trump is and why the Epstein files have suddenly disappeared. 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
#Justice4theVictims_NOW
#Justice4theVictims_NOW
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Looks like the regime has put JD in charge of bullshit.
January 11, 2026 at 9:08 PM
Looks like the regime has put JD in charge of bullshit.
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
40% of Bluesky have been contestants on Jeopardy making us a very smart website but all of them came in third so its not like that impressive
January 9, 2026 at 3:25 AM
40% of Bluesky have been contestants on Jeopardy making us a very smart website but all of them came in third so its not like that impressive
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Here’s some things that can be done by a party out of power
- file impeachment articles every day in the House
- withhold unanimous consent in the senate and filibuster every nominee
- be everywhere with comms saying this is lawless and impeachable
- file impeachment articles every day in the House
- withhold unanimous consent in the senate and filibuster every nominee
- be everywhere with comms saying this is lawless and impeachable
January 8, 2026 at 3:16 AM
Here’s some things that can be done by a party out of power
- file impeachment articles every day in the House
- withhold unanimous consent in the senate and filibuster every nominee
- be everywhere with comms saying this is lawless and impeachable
- file impeachment articles every day in the House
- withhold unanimous consent in the senate and filibuster every nominee
- be everywhere with comms saying this is lawless and impeachable
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Governor I was not familiar with your game
January 8, 2026 at 9:51 PM
Governor I was not familiar with your game
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
"Over the last 30 years, I have hospitalized hundreds of children with complications from influenza, RSV, rotavirus and other vaccine-preventable diseases that have now been removed from the CDC schedule. I have never hospitalized a child from a vaccine reaction."
abcnews.go.com/Health/pedia...
abcnews.go.com/Health/pedia...
Some pediatricians are already seeing negative effects of changing vaccine recommendations
Pediatricians told ABC News they are urging parents to still vaccinate their children despite changing federal guidance
abcnews.go.com
January 8, 2026 at 3:31 AM
"Over the last 30 years, I have hospitalized hundreds of children with complications from influenza, RSV, rotavirus and other vaccine-preventable diseases that have now been removed from the CDC schedule. I have never hospitalized a child from a vaccine reaction."
abcnews.go.com/Health/pedia...
abcnews.go.com/Health/pedia...
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
CBS News, probably: “We salute you, Kristi Noem!”
(I guess I have to say this is satire because it’s too believable)
(I guess I have to say this is satire because it’s too believable)
January 8, 2026 at 9:44 PM
CBS News, probably: “We salute you, Kristi Noem!”
(I guess I have to say this is satire because it’s too believable)
(I guess I have to say this is satire because it’s too believable)
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Canada vs. USA
January 8, 2026 at 8:31 AM
Canada vs. USA
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
These people vote.
January 8, 2026 at 3:36 AM
These people vote.
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
You have the Seahawks losing 24-10 at home in the NFC Championship game at home? The Seahawks have lost a game by more than 4 points all year. Thinking the Rams are the better team is fine (I disagree), but to think they will get blown out at home is your worst take here.
January 8, 2026 at 4:40 PM
You have the Seahawks losing 24-10 at home in the NFC Championship game at home? The Seahawks have lost a game by more than 4 points all year. Thinking the Rams are the better team is fine (I disagree), but to think they will get blown out at home is your worst take here.
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Relax! If we were *truly* in fascism, all the things that are currently happening would be happening.
January 8, 2026 at 1:38 AM
Relax! If we were *truly* in fascism, all the things that are currently happening would be happening.
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Any reporter using the words "Secretary of War" or "Department of War" should no longer be considered a serious #journalist.
There is no Department of War. The divisions & agencies of the #USA Govt are created & monikered by #Congress only.
Can't parse basic #Civics? You're unqualified, go away.
There is no Department of War. The divisions & agencies of the #USA Govt are created & monikered by #Congress only.
Can't parse basic #Civics? You're unqualified, go away.
January 7, 2026 at 4:14 PM
Any reporter using the words "Secretary of War" or "Department of War" should no longer be considered a serious #journalist.
There is no Department of War. The divisions & agencies of the #USA Govt are created & monikered by #Congress only.
Can't parse basic #Civics? You're unqualified, go away.
There is no Department of War. The divisions & agencies of the #USA Govt are created & monikered by #Congress only.
Can't parse basic #Civics? You're unqualified, go away.
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
This guy is no less evil than Tucker, but he is much dumber. And for that I'm grateful. He has a rock tumbler where a head should be. He is a caveman with a staff that reads him 4chan like a lullaby.
Jesse Watters highlights that Renee Nicole Good, the woman killed by ICE, had "pronouns in her bio" and "leaves behind a lesbian partner and a child from a previous marriage"
January 8, 2026 at 4:35 AM
This guy is no less evil than Tucker, but he is much dumber. And for that I'm grateful. He has a rock tumbler where a head should be. He is a caveman with a staff that reads him 4chan like a lullaby.
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Cannot imagine anyone vaguely normal, professionally, or even just as a fan, going to the US for The World Cup
January 8, 2026 at 4:20 PM
Cannot imagine anyone vaguely normal, professionally, or even just as a fan, going to the US for The World Cup
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
I am impeaching Secretary Kristi Noem, who is an incompetent leader and a disgrace to our democracy.
She wreaked havoc in the Chicagoland area and has brought her reign of terror to Minneapolis. One of her rogue ICE agents shot and killed an innocent woman today. It must come to an end.
She wreaked havoc in the Chicagoland area and has brought her reign of terror to Minneapolis. One of her rogue ICE agents shot and killed an innocent woman today. It must come to an end.
January 8, 2026 at 12:00 AM
I am impeaching Secretary Kristi Noem, who is an incompetent leader and a disgrace to our democracy.
She wreaked havoc in the Chicagoland area and has brought her reign of terror to Minneapolis. One of her rogue ICE agents shot and killed an innocent woman today. It must come to an end.
She wreaked havoc in the Chicagoland area and has brought her reign of terror to Minneapolis. One of her rogue ICE agents shot and killed an innocent woman today. It must come to an end.
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Will we be banned from the Winter Olympics next month? We’ve banned other Countries for much less.
January 7, 2026 at 11:21 PM
Will we be banned from the Winter Olympics next month? We’ve banned other Countries for much less.
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
You have to understand, the agent involved is stupid. We begged him to stop standing in front of cars but he can’t figure it out. He’s stupid and he has anxiety from the time before when he was stupid, so we just have to let him pop off. We wish he weren’t, but he is. And we have to respect that
January 8, 2026 at 7:45 PM
You have to understand, the agent involved is stupid. We begged him to stop standing in front of cars but he can’t figure it out. He’s stupid and he has anxiety from the time before when he was stupid, so we just have to let him pop off. We wish he weren’t, but he is. And we have to respect that
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Thoughts and prayers to the ICE killer who is recovering in hospital from not being run over by anyone.
January 8, 2026 at 10:44 AM
Thoughts and prayers to the ICE killer who is recovering in hospital from not being run over by anyone.
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
#BoycottFIFA2026
It's time. The USA is a rogue nation and it's not safe any anyone to travel to. The footballing world needs to take a principled stand and not send their teams to play.
It's time. The USA is a rogue nation and it's not safe any anyone to travel to. The footballing world needs to take a principled stand and not send their teams to play.
January 8, 2026 at 8:31 AM
#BoycottFIFA2026
It's time. The USA is a rogue nation and it's not safe any anyone to travel to. The footballing world needs to take a principled stand and not send their teams to play.
It's time. The USA is a rogue nation and it's not safe any anyone to travel to. The footballing world needs to take a principled stand and not send their teams to play.
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
Every second the murderer is not arrested is another second for feds to hide him in a place that would create a jurisdictional fight. He's on video killing a person. You have to arrest this guy an hour ago, but you might still have time now.
January 7, 2026 at 7:09 PM
Every second the murderer is not arrested is another second for feds to hide him in a place that would create a jurisdictional fight. He's on video killing a person. You have to arrest this guy an hour ago, but you might still have time now.
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
the video is out, there is no reason to not send local law enforcement to arrest the ice agent in question and yes i know they will refuse to hand them over and you treat that exactly how you would treat it under any other similar circumstance
January 7, 2026 at 6:36 PM
the video is out, there is no reason to not send local law enforcement to arrest the ice agent in question and yes i know they will refuse to hand them over and you treat that exactly how you would treat it under any other similar circumstance
Reposted by Doofenschmirtz
losing my mind at the "she should have followed directions" people
really? really? you're cool with "if you don't follow directions, they get to kill you"? that seems like a good state of affairs to you? that seems like how law enforcement ought to work: instant obeisance or death?
really? really? you're cool with "if you don't follow directions, they get to kill you"? that seems like a good state of affairs to you? that seems like how law enforcement ought to work: instant obeisance or death?
January 7, 2026 at 6:25 PM
losing my mind at the "she should have followed directions" people
really? really? you're cool with "if you don't follow directions, they get to kill you"? that seems like a good state of affairs to you? that seems like how law enforcement ought to work: instant obeisance or death?
really? really? you're cool with "if you don't follow directions, they get to kill you"? that seems like a good state of affairs to you? that seems like how law enforcement ought to work: instant obeisance or death?