The Card
@thecard.bsky.social
Creator of depressing comics. Liver of a depressing life. Writer of depressing bios.
Having a brain that refuses to accept the possibility that I’ll ever be okay kinda sucks, actually.
February 7, 2026 at 2:34 AM
Having a brain that refuses to accept the possibility that I’ll ever be okay kinda sucks, actually.
My anxious stomach’s like, “Hey, wanna hear my impression of two cats in a knife fight with Donald Duck?”
February 7, 2026 at 2:30 AM
My anxious stomach’s like, “Hey, wanna hear my impression of two cats in a knife fight with Donald Duck?”
After careful consideration and intense soul-searching,* I have decided to end my months-long caffeine fast.
*ran out of decaf tea and needed something to drink with cookies
*ran out of decaf tea and needed something to drink with cookies
February 7, 2026 at 2:23 AM
After careful consideration and intense soul-searching,* I have decided to end my months-long caffeine fast.
*ran out of decaf tea and needed something to drink with cookies
*ran out of decaf tea and needed something to drink with cookies
If the staffer who supposedly posted the video actually existed, they’d be breathing a sigh of relief.
BREAKING: Trump says he 'didn't make a mistake' with his racist video post.
Q: "A number of Republicans are calling on you to apologize for that post. Is that something you're going to do?"
Trump: "No, I didn't make a mistake."
He adds later: "I guess it was a take off on the Lion King."
Q: "A number of Republicans are calling on you to apologize for that post. Is that something you're going to do?"
Trump: "No, I didn't make a mistake."
He adds later: "I guess it was a take off on the Lion King."
February 7, 2026 at 1:57 AM
If the staffer who supposedly posted the video actually existed, they’d be breathing a sigh of relief.
So when they call themselves the party of personal responsibility, they mean for nonexistent staffers.
February 6, 2026 at 7:51 PM
So when they call themselves the party of personal responsibility, they mean for nonexistent staffers.
Frankly, I don’t know why Republicans are even pretending to give a shit about this. If they were to simply own their racism, do they honestly believe they’d lose a single member of their base?
Anyone who’s paid a modicum of attention over the last decade knows exactly what he and his party are.
Anyone who’s paid a modicum of attention over the last decade knows exactly what he and his party are.
February 6, 2026 at 7:23 PM
Frankly, I don’t know why Republicans are even pretending to give a shit about this. If they were to simply own their racism, do they honestly believe they’d lose a single member of their base?
Anyone who’s paid a modicum of attention over the last decade knows exactly what he and his party are.
Anyone who’s paid a modicum of attention over the last decade knows exactly what he and his party are.
Beneath that vile, racist exterior lies a man who can’t be bothered to take any semblance of responsibility.
POLITICO reporting that the White House has now claimed the ape video was an accident and removed it.
February 6, 2026 at 7:13 PM
Beneath that vile, racist exterior lies a man who can’t be bothered to take any semblance of responsibility.
If you're a fan of my stuff and would like to help me continue creating during a difficult time, kindly consider sharing this post, leaving a tip, or becoming a monthly subscriber.
Support The Card
Support The Card
ko-fi.com
February 6, 2026 at 5:31 PM
If you're a fan of my stuff and would like to help me continue creating during a difficult time, kindly consider sharing this post, leaving a tip, or becoming a monthly subscriber.
Watching a clip from an early '00s show in which 40 hours is regarded as an excessive length for a video game like
a woman with a ring on her finger is covering her face with her hand in front of a prime logo
ALT: a woman with a ring on her finger is covering her face with her hand in front of a prime logo
media.tenor.com
February 6, 2026 at 5:07 PM
Watching a clip from an early '00s show in which 40 hours is regarded as an excessive length for a video game like
Every time I think society has evolved beyond "pineapple on pizza" jokes.
a cartoon girl in a blue dress is kneeling in a field holding a bag
ALT: a cartoon girl in a blue dress is kneeling in a field holding a bag
media.tenor.com
February 6, 2026 at 5:00 PM
Every time I think society has evolved beyond "pineapple on pizza" jokes.
New comic! Wherein Cord works hard.
February 6, 2026 at 2:33 PM
New comic! Wherein Cord works hard.
Happy Work Naked (While Eating Soup) Day!
February 6, 2026 at 1:09 PM
Happy Work Naked (While Eating Soup) Day!
My anxiety isn't much of a team player.
February 6, 2026 at 12:24 PM
My anxiety isn't much of a team player.
This show has developed such a unique identity and distinct comic voice over the years. One of the few decades-spanning animated sitcoms to get better and more ambitious with age.
I’d put present-day American Dad right up there with golden era Simpsons.
I’d put present-day American Dad right up there with golden era Simpsons.
February 6, 2026 at 11:41 AM
This show has developed such a unique identity and distinct comic voice over the years. One of the few decades-spanning animated sitcoms to get better and more ambitious with age.
I’d put present-day American Dad right up there with golden era Simpsons.
I’d put present-day American Dad right up there with golden era Simpsons.
It’s really neat that the media has collectively decided that cognitive fitness is no longer a prerequisite for holding elected office.
February 6, 2026 at 11:32 AM
It’s really neat that the media has collectively decided that cognitive fitness is no longer a prerequisite for holding elected office.
And as heinous as this behavior is, it’s probably meant to serve as a distraction from something even worse, which is meant to serve as a distraction from something even worse, which is meant to serve as a distraction from something even worse.
The President of the United States is up past midnight posting videos of Barack and Michelle Obama as monkeys.
Of course all Republicans will deny having seen it…but we can make sure everyone else is reminded about what a racist POS Trump is.
Of course all Republicans will deny having seen it…but we can make sure everyone else is reminded about what a racist POS Trump is.
A screenshot from a video posted on Trump's Truth Social account: truthsocial.com/@realDonaldT...
February 6, 2026 at 10:50 AM
And as heinous as this behavior is, it’s probably meant to serve as a distraction from something even worse, which is meant to serve as a distraction from something even worse, which is meant to serve as a distraction from something even worse.
Dude keeps giving away the game while the media’s like
February 6, 2026 at 10:32 AM
Dude keeps giving away the game while the media’s like
“Look, it’s not like I support EVERYTHING the guy does.”
I don’t fucking care. He has said and done more than enough utterly indefensible shit to earn the perpetual scorn of every non-horrible person.
I don’t fucking care. He has said and done more than enough utterly indefensible shit to earn the perpetual scorn of every non-horrible person.
February 6, 2026 at 10:30 AM
“Look, it’s not like I support EVERYTHING the guy does.”
I don’t fucking care. He has said and done more than enough utterly indefensible shit to earn the perpetual scorn of every non-horrible person.
I don’t fucking care. He has said and done more than enough utterly indefensible shit to earn the perpetual scorn of every non-horrible person.
Or as the mainstream media will soon term it, “An image that may or may not be seen as racist - who can say for sure?”
Also, when Mike Johnson claims not to have seen it, can a reporter please take out their phone and pull up this image?
Also, when Mike Johnson claims not to have seen it, can a reporter please take out their phone and pull up this image?
A screenshot from a video posted on Trump's Truth Social account: truthsocial.com/@realDonaldT...
February 6, 2026 at 10:10 AM
Or as the mainstream media will soon term it, “An image that may or may not be seen as racist - who can say for sure?”
Also, when Mike Johnson claims not to have seen it, can a reporter please take out their phone and pull up this image?
Also, when Mike Johnson claims not to have seen it, can a reporter please take out their phone and pull up this image?
Stupid sleep, being all elusive and shit.
February 6, 2026 at 9:55 AM
Stupid sleep, being all elusive and shit.
Horrible week as far as me and feeling good go.
February 6, 2026 at 3:02 AM
Horrible week as far as me and feeling good go.
National Optimist Day is canceled on account of reality.
February 5, 2026 at 9:10 PM
National Optimist Day is canceled on account of reality.
Got my car washed due to it getting saltier than me.
February 5, 2026 at 9:08 PM
Got my car washed due to it getting saltier than me.
Much like the person who said, “Being poor fucking SUCKS! I fucking hate it so fucking much! FUUUUUCK!” 😔
February 5, 2026 at 7:10 PM
Much like the person who said, “Being poor fucking SUCKS! I fucking hate it so fucking much! FUUUUUCK!” 😔