Criag
@craigpsutton.bsky.social
Opinions are not my own. Send help!
Just tryna be a silly billy. I do stand-up, improv, sketch, and I'm a professional game designer.
My bangers feed:
https://tinyurl.com/nm3kyaav
My sketches here:
https://youtube.com/@teamlaundry?si=ZWIzuYFi5jM7V7_T
Just tryna be a silly billy. I do stand-up, improv, sketch, and I'm a professional game designer.
My bangers feed:
https://tinyurl.com/nm3kyaav
My sketches here:
https://youtube.com/@teamlaundry?si=ZWIzuYFi5jM7V7_T
Pinned
Criag
@craigpsutton.bsky.social
· Jul 11
Welcome to Craig's Bluesky page!
Estd. 2023
“Forever is composed of nows.”
Estd. 2023
“Forever is composed of nows.”
Oops! I'm still writing December 25 2025 on all my checks!
December 26, 2025 at 6:02 PM
Oops! I'm still writing December 25 2025 on all my checks!
Reposted by Criag
[somberly] You cannot serve both god and money [upbeat music hits] Until now. Introducing god as a service
December 25, 2025 at 11:20 PM
[somberly] You cannot serve both god and money [upbeat music hits] Until now. Introducing god as a service
These politicians of the wasteland are so out of touch with the every day marauder. We can't even afford enough gasoline for the blood harvest anymore!
December 26, 2025 at 6:26 AM
These politicians of the wasteland are so out of touch with the every day marauder. We can't even afford enough gasoline for the blood harvest anymore!
But as for me and Grandpa,
we've achieved (climax)
we've achieved (climax)
December 25, 2025 at 11:26 PM
But as for me and Grandpa,
we've achieved (climax)
we've achieved (climax)
The ear hairs start coming and they don't stop coming
December 25, 2025 at 10:23 PM
The ear hairs start coming and they don't stop coming
Sorry if Santa was all bloody delivering presents. I filled his ass with buckshot as he was escaping through my chimney.
December 25, 2025 at 6:10 PM
Sorry if Santa was all bloody delivering presents. I filled his ass with buckshot as he was escaping through my chimney.
Reposted by Criag
A very merry Christmas to one and all. Except the twats
December 24, 2025 at 10:14 PM
A very merry Christmas to one and all. Except the twats
Reposted by Criag
My dog Mario crossed the rainbow bridge today. He got 4th.
July 21, 2024 at 5:43 AM
My dog Mario crossed the rainbow bridge today. He got 4th.
Reposted by Criag
Shania Mario: That don't impress a-me much
December 14, 2023 at 10:53 PM
Shania Mario: That don't impress a-me much
Oh shit I forgot to do my new years resolution. I gotta go vote real quick.
December 24, 2025 at 10:09 PM
Oh shit I forgot to do my new years resolution. I gotta go vote real quick.
Reposted by Criag
Both me and this house spider are working from home. We both need the web to work. And we both just got let go; I was fired, he was released from a cup outside.
December 23, 2025 at 5:08 AM
Both me and this house spider are working from home. We both need the web to work. And we both just got let go; I was fired, he was released from a cup outside.
Reposted by Criag
Donating my remains to a university but specifying it can only be used by the humanities
December 24, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Donating my remains to a university but specifying it can only be used by the humanities
Reposted by Criag
if you don't think weed is a medicine go to a dispensary and look at the prices
December 24, 2025 at 12:14 AM
if you don't think weed is a medicine go to a dispensary and look at the prices
Reposted by Criag
The zoo is the perfect place to have terrible flatulence
December 24, 2025 at 4:40 AM
The zoo is the perfect place to have terrible flatulence
Reposted by Criag
With your brains, and my gift for exploiting people with brains, there's no telling what's in this for me!
December 23, 2025 at 11:33 PM
With your brains, and my gift for exploiting people with brains, there's no telling what's in this for me!
Nothing tastes as good as picking your nose feels
December 24, 2025 at 4:58 AM
Nothing tastes as good as picking your nose feels
Logging on to Bluesky to see today's hottest takes from Twitter
December 24, 2025 at 4:53 AM
Logging on to Bluesky to see today's hottest takes from Twitter
Reposted by Criag
Jodie Foster: They should have sent a poet
Poet: Aliens ahoy! A galactic sight. When you’re in space all day is night
Poet: Aliens ahoy! A galactic sight. When you’re in space all day is night
December 24, 2025 at 2:47 AM
Jodie Foster: They should have sent a poet
Poet: Aliens ahoy! A galactic sight. When you’re in space all day is night
Poet: Aliens ahoy! A galactic sight. When you’re in space all day is night
The zoo is the perfect place to have terrible flatulence
December 24, 2025 at 4:40 AM
The zoo is the perfect place to have terrible flatulence
Reposted by Criag
Jamiroquai when Jamiro vewwy sad
December 23, 2025 at 5:19 PM
Jamiroquai when Jamiro vewwy sad
Y'all heard about this? Well if you haven't, this is like if that were this other thing.
December 23, 2025 at 8:14 PM
Y'all heard about this? Well if you haven't, this is like if that were this other thing.
Reposted by Criag
(watching the movie elf with the toddlers)
me: did you know that actor is andy richter and one time he liked my skeet about costco
kids: oh wow, did he repost you??
me: *lowers head* no… just a like
me: did you know that actor is andy richter and one time he liked my skeet about costco
kids: oh wow, did he repost you??
me: *lowers head* no… just a like
December 23, 2025 at 7:01 PM
(watching the movie elf with the toddlers)
me: did you know that actor is andy richter and one time he liked my skeet about costco
kids: oh wow, did he repost you??
me: *lowers head* no… just a like
me: did you know that actor is andy richter and one time he liked my skeet about costco
kids: oh wow, did he repost you??
me: *lowers head* no… just a like
I'm ready to sell out! Hit me up Epson! Or Nissan!
December 23, 2025 at 8:03 PM
I'm ready to sell out! Hit me up Epson! Or Nissan!
Reposted by Criag
If I could edit my posts I'd put even more types in them
December 23, 2025 at 5:09 AM
If I could edit my posts I'd put even more types in them
Reposted by Criag
