Chris' RacCoons
@chrisraccoons.bsky.social
We're a gaze (hence they/them) of shitposting raccoons originally on Twitter to mock Chris Coons. #AnimalCaucus.
Our jokes are meant to amuse us, but they COULD amuse you, too. Who can say?
If you recognize us, no you don't (please).
Our jokes are meant to amuse us, but they COULD amuse you, too. Who can say?
If you recognize us, no you don't (please).
Pinned
Regarding follows:
If you're following us, we hope it's because you enjoy what we post! Welcome! If you're not enjoying it, no worries about unfollowing.
We follow people whose interactions we enjoy, so have fun! We do sometimes unfollow to protect mental health; please don't take it personally
If you're following us, we hope it's because you enjoy what we post! Welcome! If you're not enjoying it, no worries about unfollowing.
We follow people whose interactions we enjoy, so have fun! We do sometimes unfollow to protect mental health; please don't take it personally
Reposted by Chris' RacCoons
I listened to the Megyn Kelly clip and my takeaway is that she should change her name to Megyn R Kelly
November 14, 2025 at 3:42 PM
I listened to the Megyn Kelly clip and my takeaway is that she should change her name to Megyn R Kelly
Not entirely sure what bubble.blue is doing, but we're in company that's far too good for us.
(This is the "Last Month" version.)
(This is the "Last Month" version.)
November 14, 2025 at 3:32 PM
Not entirely sure what bubble.blue is doing, but we're in company that's far too good for us.
(This is the "Last Month" version.)
(This is the "Last Month" version.)
We shall call it John Fetterbot
Russian Robot Faceplants on Stage During Moscow Showcase https://gizmodo.com/russian-robot-faceplants-on-stage-during-moscow-showcase-2000685134
Russian Robot Faceplants on Stage During Moscow Showcase
The humanoid robot industry is still a little shaky on its feet.
gizmodo.com
November 14, 2025 at 12:02 PM
We shall call it John Fetterbot
We genuinely love the word "alpharandomly." It might be the most raccoon word ever created on this here skyline.
So alpharandomly. The worst kind.
November 13, 2025 at 2:54 PM
We genuinely love the word "alpharandomly." It might be the most raccoon word ever created on this here skyline.
Remember to always say "Oh, shit!" on Bluesky.
If you instead say "Oh, shoot!" you might end up permabanned.
If you instead say "Oh, shoot!" you might end up permabanned.
Guys, Bluesky has made it abundantly clear that it’s going to take any type of death threat seriously- even if it’s a reference.
Like the Steven universe comic, or when someone even said to jump into a lake and Bluesky took that as a death threat.
This is actually quite consistent for them
Like the Steven universe comic, or when someone even said to jump into a lake and Bluesky took that as a death threat.
This is actually quite consistent for them
The account owner of @sarahkendzior.bsky.social was suspended for 72 hours for expressing a desire to shoot the author of an article. The post, made 11/10, stated: "I want to shoot the author of this article just to watch him die." 1/2
November 12, 2025 at 7:37 PM
Remember to always say "Oh, shit!" on Bluesky.
If you instead say "Oh, shoot!" you might end up permabanned.
If you instead say "Oh, shoot!" you might end up permabanned.
There it is. The worst thing we've posted.
OK, yes- the worst thing we've posted so far.
OK, yes- the worst thing we've posted so far.
This is why we keep asking you to put in cuck chairs, Zoo.
November 11, 2025 at 2:24 PM
There it is. The worst thing we've posted.
OK, yes- the worst thing we've posted so far.
OK, yes- the worst thing we've posted so far.
Atlanta's new tourism slogan:
Come visit Mylanta.
Come visit Mylanta.
November 11, 2025 at 12:30 PM
Atlanta's new tourism slogan:
Come visit Mylanta.
Come visit Mylanta.
Reposted by Chris' RacCoons
honestly I hope some veterinary clinic somewhere is offering neuterings at a reduced price this month
because "no nut november"
because "no nut november"
November 11, 2025 at 2:27 AM
honestly I hope some veterinary clinic somewhere is offering neuterings at a reduced price this month
because "no nut november"
because "no nut november"
Why are "Do not eat" and "Donut. eat." so similar?
November 11, 2025 at 2:04 AM
Why are "Do not eat" and "Donut. eat." so similar?
Thunderstorms in November.... That's fine, right?
November 10, 2025 at 1:09 AM
Thunderstorms in November.... That's fine, right?
Reposted by Chris' RacCoons
November 7, 2025 at 8:29 PM
Y'know, Tuesday was a great day for elections, yesterday was rough, but today's been okay, so it's really sandwiched Wednesday, if you will.
OK, we shouldn't be posting this dreck.
OK, we shouldn't be posting this dreck.
November 6, 2025 at 8:22 PM
Y'know, Tuesday was a great day for elections, yesterday was rough, but today's been okay, so it's really sandwiched Wednesday, if you will.
OK, we shouldn't be posting this dreck.
OK, we shouldn't be posting this dreck.
Reposted by Chris' RacCoons
It's time to put this case to bread. Err, bed.
November 6, 2025 at 7:49 PM
It's time to put this case to bread. Err, bed.
Leading with books.... Pandering to upper-middle-class Santa. 🙄
we’re about to find out if loving SimCity makes you a better mayor
Mamdani was asked in 2002 by NY Mag what he wanted for Christmas and said SimCity 3000
Mamdani was asked in 2002 by NY Mag what he wanted for Christmas and said SimCity 3000
November 6, 2025 at 11:42 AM
Leading with books.... Pandering to upper-middle-class Santa. 🙄
We make $299,515 and this is disincentivizing us working harder. (/s, obvi)
This is how it looked on the ballot.
Clear and easy to understand.
Clear and easy to understand.
November 5, 2025 at 7:15 PM
We make $299,515 and this is disincentivizing us working harder. (/s, obvi)
Absolutely not the point, but now we're curious about the ratio of halal carts to hot dog stands in NYC.
November 5, 2025 at 6:31 PM
Absolutely not the point, but now we're curious about the ratio of halal carts to hot dog stands in NYC.
Still don't love sewing, but we're done! Holiday gifts for mother-in-law done!
November 4, 2025 at 11:34 PM
Still don't love sewing, but we're done! Holiday gifts for mother-in-law done!
Reposted by Chris' RacCoons
The good thing about Bayesian statistics in this era is you can just pull answers out of your posterior
November 2, 2025 at 11:47 AM
The good thing about Bayesian statistics in this era is you can just pull answers out of your posterior
For those who have watched our complex #weaving videos and found them slow or stressful, here's something a bit more straightforward. Making ~6 yards of cloth to make place mats.
November 1, 2025 at 11:53 PM
For those who have watched our complex #weaving videos and found them slow or stressful, here's something a bit more straightforward. Making ~6 yards of cloth to make place mats.
When you see a piece of tuna that looks this good, you've got to make a nice dinner.
November 1, 2025 at 10:26 PM
When you see a piece of tuna that looks this good, you've got to make a nice dinner.
What'd you call her?!?
Inferior quality Morty!
November 1, 2025 at 2:34 AM
What'd you call her?!?
Reposted by Chris' RacCoons
It's only a subskeet if the comrade is handcuffed during the ejaculation.
October 31, 2025 at 8:38 PM
It's only a subskeet if the comrade is handcuffed during the ejaculation.
Reposted by Chris' RacCoons
trick or treating sure ain’t what it used to be
October 26, 2023 at 3:58 PM
trick or treating sure ain’t what it used to be