Agent of Chaos
@bradlocke.bsky.social
Sports writer who once gave Heisman winner Andre Ware bad directions to a press box bathroom. | Recovering Calvinist.
How’s that old saying go, “You can’t have your cake and eat ass too” well I disagree
December 21, 2025 at 2:58 AM
How’s that old saying go, “You can’t have your cake and eat ass too” well I disagree
Reposted by Agent of Chaos
What’s your angle? I ask the protractor. He’s being obtuse. I’m having acute paranoia. This can’t be right.
December 10, 2025 at 2:52 AM
What’s your angle? I ask the protractor. He’s being obtuse. I’m having acute paranoia. This can’t be right.
Reposted by Agent of Chaos
tinder 2025 wrapped: you’re a whore
December 19, 2025 at 3:42 PM
tinder 2025 wrapped: you’re a whore
Tis the season … for sneezin’
December 19, 2025 at 6:54 PM
Tis the season … for sneezin’
Money tip: When hiring a sex worker, try and get the best bang for your buck.
December 19, 2025 at 3:24 AM
Money tip: When hiring a sex worker, try and get the best bang for your buck.
I want to eat wontons wantonly, as is my wont
December 16, 2025 at 10:52 PM
I want to eat wontons wantonly, as is my wont
HER: Ow, I have a stiff muscle!
ME: I also have a stiff muscle … IN MY PANTS
ME: I also have a stiff muscle … IN MY PANTS
December 10, 2025 at 4:52 AM
HER: Ow, I have a stiff muscle!
ME: I also have a stiff muscle … IN MY PANTS
ME: I also have a stiff muscle … IN MY PANTS
If your eye gets infected with an “and” or a “but” that’s called conjunctionitis
Folks,,,
Folks,,,
December 5, 2025 at 11:38 PM
If your eye gets infected with an “and” or a “but” that’s called conjunctionitis
Folks,,,
Folks,,,
Reposted by Agent of Chaos
For his last meal Pete Hegseth should request the Nuremburger.
December 1, 2025 at 2:34 AM
For his last meal Pete Hegseth should request the Nuremburger.
Broncos’ Alex Singleton back on the field one week after surgery for testicular cancer. Man, that guy’s got ball!
December 1, 2025 at 12:39 AM
Broncos’ Alex Singleton back on the field one week after surgery for testicular cancer. Man, that guy’s got ball!
Reposted by Agent of Chaos
Imagine hating me and I'm just sitting here hating myself.
December 1, 2025 at 12:21 AM
Imagine hating me and I'm just sitting here hating myself.
Reposted by Agent of Chaos
Get ready for the start of Extra Nut December.
November 30, 2025 at 11:12 PM
Get ready for the start of Extra Nut December.
Reposted by Agent of Chaos
Licking General Tso’s sauce off your thigh
November 30, 2025 at 11:21 PM
Licking General Tso’s sauce off your thigh
Reposted by Agent of Chaos
I'm not entitled, I'm a hot girl, it's different
November 29, 2025 at 5:47 PM
I'm not entitled, I'm a hot girl, it's different
I drink bourbon because, as a sports writer, it’s a required part of the job.
December 1, 2025 at 12:04 AM
I drink bourbon because, as a sports writer, it’s a required part of the job.
If I’d known about bourbon and Coke as a kid, I’d have had a much happier childhood.
November 30, 2025 at 12:02 AM
If I’d known about bourbon and Coke as a kid, I’d have had a much happier childhood.
Reposted by Agent of Chaos
putting two cats in a box and calling it the Discount Schroedinger
November 21, 2025 at 3:08 AM
putting two cats in a box and calling it the Discount Schroedinger
Pretty sure our oldest cat both loves me AND hates me. Equally.
November 21, 2025 at 3:17 AM
Pretty sure our oldest cat both loves me AND hates me. Equally.
Reposted by Agent of Chaos
Do you think Charlie Brown's parents make high-pitched trombone sounds when they're copulating.
November 21, 2025 at 1:48 AM
Do you think Charlie Brown's parents make high-pitched trombone sounds when they're copulating.
Dipping in here just to escape the boundless MAGA stupidity elsewhere.
November 21, 2025 at 3:08 AM
Dipping in here just to escape the boundless MAGA stupidity elsewhere.
I’m an ass man. Love em. Look at them all the time. Hell, I’ve probably looked at yours.
November 15, 2025 at 9:44 PM
I’m an ass man. Love em. Look at them all the time. Hell, I’ve probably looked at yours.
“Lassie! What is it, girl? Timmy is stuck in the well? Again? Well let’s leave the little shit down there a while so maybe he’ll finally learn his lesson.”
November 15, 2025 at 5:09 PM
“Lassie! What is it, girl? Timmy is stuck in the well? Again? Well let’s leave the little shit down there a while so maybe he’ll finally learn his lesson.”
I’m not an alcoholic, I’m an “experienced drinker.”
November 11, 2025 at 4:13 AM
I’m not an alcoholic, I’m an “experienced drinker.”
Coach Prime more like Coach Time to Retire
November 2, 2025 at 2:59 AM
Coach Prime more like Coach Time to Retire