The best Dave you know
@thefaceofdave.bsky.social
Australia’s Favourite Dave. I've never been though.
Link to my brain stuffs: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaao77jomek3o
Add me on Steam: https://steamcommunity.com/id/TheFaceOfDave/
Buy me a coffee: buymeacoffee.com/thefaceofdave
Link to my brain stuffs: bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaao77jomek3o
Add me on Steam: https://steamcommunity.com/id/TheFaceOfDave/
Buy me a coffee: buymeacoffee.com/thefaceofdave
Pinned
I used to do a podcast that has officially died. I have a good mic and headset and I'm fun to talk to. If you have a podcast idea and you don't suck, DM me. But you have to say, "podcast," in the DM so I know that you are not a bot.
Hey, why were you late to work?
Well, you're a fuck up, because the Dow is over 50000 so fuck you.
Well, you're a fuck up, because the Dow is over 50000 so fuck you.
February 15, 2026 at 4:17 AM
Hey, why were you late to work?
Well, you're a fuck up, because the Dow is over 50000 so fuck you.
Well, you're a fuck up, because the Dow is over 50000 so fuck you.
Reposted by The best Dave you know
PAPA SMURF (watching Mel about to swallow mouthwash): Oh no! Gargle, Mel!
February 14, 2026 at 8:15 PM
PAPA SMURF (watching Mel about to swallow mouthwash): Oh no! Gargle, Mel!
I clean up nice.
February 14, 2026 at 8:13 PM
I clean up nice.
I know I joke that I'm stupid a lot, but I'm average to slightly above average intelligence. I'm a native English speaker. This preamble is leading up to the dumbest question I've ever thought. Why is it, "20 dollar bill" and not, "20 dollars bill?" I can't stop thinking about it.
February 14, 2026 at 4:26 PM
I know I joke that I'm stupid a lot, but I'm average to slightly above average intelligence. I'm a native English speaker. This preamble is leading up to the dumbest question I've ever thought. Why is it, "20 dollar bill" and not, "20 dollars bill?" I can't stop thinking about it.
People think I'm smart because I'm ugly but they don't hold that opinion long after they meet me.
February 13, 2026 at 4:32 PM
People think I'm smart because I'm ugly but they don't hold that opinion long after they meet me.
I don't want to brag about not being as sick as I've been the past couple of days but I ate a bowl of top ramen and didn't die.
February 13, 2026 at 1:52 AM
I don't want to brag about not being as sick as I've been the past couple of days but I ate a bowl of top ramen and didn't die.
If CS Lewis quit fiction and decided to write management books they would've been called Narnia Business.
February 12, 2026 at 11:18 PM
If CS Lewis quit fiction and decided to write management books they would've been called Narnia Business.
The popular candy "Mike and Ike" is short for Michael, Andrew, Ichael.
February 12, 2026 at 8:25 PM
The popular candy "Mike and Ike" is short for Michael, Andrew, Ichael.
Bluesky giving us drafts is great but a deleted draft should be called an aborted skeetus.
February 11, 2026 at 8:12 PM
Bluesky giving us drafts is great but a deleted draft should be called an aborted skeetus.
Do you think when they air Back to the Future in other countries, they dub over all of the speed moments with Doc or Marty saying, "141.62 km/h," instead?
February 10, 2026 at 6:55 PM
Do you think when they air Back to the Future in other countries, they dub over all of the speed moments with Doc or Marty saying, "141.62 km/h," instead?
I have great taste in all things and everyone who follows me has great taste in at least one thing.
February 10, 2026 at 2:51 PM
I have great taste in all things and everyone who follows me has great taste in at least one thing.
You're watching the gay hockey show with me or you're watching the gay hockey show against me.
February 10, 2026 at 12:03 AM
You're watching the gay hockey show with me or you're watching the gay hockey show against me.
Peacock just asked if I was still watching the Superbowl because of how boring it's been.
February 9, 2026 at 3:13 AM
Peacock just asked if I was still watching the Superbowl because of how boring it's been.
Anyone that switched over to TPUSA for the halftime show should have their hard drives searched.
February 9, 2026 at 1:34 AM
Anyone that switched over to TPUSA for the halftime show should have their hard drives searched.
Guys, mortgages cured racism, per the Superbowl commercial.
February 9, 2026 at 12:35 AM
Guys, mortgages cured racism, per the Superbowl commercial.
If I were depressed, would I do this?
*Puts on a Radiohead record and cries*
*Puts on a Radiohead record and cries*
February 8, 2026 at 5:05 PM
If I were depressed, would I do this?
*Puts on a Radiohead record and cries*
*Puts on a Radiohead record and cries*
Alexa: Say my name again... mmmmmm
Me: What?
Alexa: Sorry, I did not quite get that.
Me: What?
Alexa: Sorry, I did not quite get that.
February 7, 2026 at 3:47 PM
Alexa: Say my name again... mmmmmm
Me: What?
Alexa: Sorry, I did not quite get that.
Me: What?
Alexa: Sorry, I did not quite get that.
I legit just used WhatsApp for the first time. Would a European please adopt my family?
February 7, 2026 at 1:48 PM
I legit just used WhatsApp for the first time. Would a European please adopt my family?
The best way to end an awkward conversation is to invite the other person to your improv show.
February 6, 2026 at 1:08 PM
The best way to end an awkward conversation is to invite the other person to your improv show.
If there was a Jim/Dwight shipping fanfic, it would be called Beeted Rivalry.
February 5, 2026 at 11:08 PM
If there was a Jim/Dwight shipping fanfic, it would be called Beeted Rivalry.
On a scale of 1 to Homey the Clown, how bad of an idea is it to mess with you?
February 5, 2026 at 4:29 PM
On a scale of 1 to Homey the Clown, how bad of an idea is it to mess with you?
I want to open a sandwich shop that only sells weird knickknacks and clocks. I would call it Salvador Deli.
February 5, 2026 at 1:15 PM
I want to open a sandwich shop that only sells weird knickknacks and clocks. I would call it Salvador Deli.
Tall people are just people who were short but got tall later.
February 5, 2026 at 4:19 AM
Tall people are just people who were short but got tall later.
If you don't fake smoke pretzel rods when you're snacking, I don't trust you.
February 4, 2026 at 9:26 PM
If you don't fake smoke pretzel rods when you're snacking, I don't trust you.
If you line up every bone in your body end to end, you're probably on hallucinogenics.
February 4, 2026 at 9:21 PM
If you line up every bone in your body end to end, you're probably on hallucinogenics.