we did it! a perfectly structured democracy. it's got checks, it's got balances. this thing is made to last. there's only one weakness: bad guys. if somehow some bad guys who don't care about decorum got elected they could basically just tip the whole thing over. luckily such men are unelectable

Just all night coward football

went back and grabbed the full video of her intro. absolutely incredible

🇮🇹🍝👩‍🍳🤌🇮🇹🍝👩‍🍳🤌🇮🇹🍝👩‍🍳🤌🇮🇹🍝👩‍🍳🤌

Please don't put in the newspaper that 28 children laughed at me

my friend read an article about crows bringing a little girl gifts because she fed them, so he started giving them bits of his lunch. this had the effect of teaching the crows that he was weak and that his lunch could be taken by force even in his own yard

Dudes Rock

Flo Rida claiming he invented rubber bands is a pretty crazy rap brag.

“why is the us government posting racist franklin the turtle memes?” I dunno man, hadn’t noticed. seems like you’d have to go out of your way to see that kind of thing. did you know you can look at pornography online

oh they gave me a blue check now I can say how I REALLY feel!!! trans rights free Palestine housing is a human right universal health care for all six hour day for eight hours pay mandatory minimum wage raises that track to rent & cost of living protect the oceans & the rivers and bring back Jujubes

thinking of her today

Olivia Nuzzi got horny at the part of ET where he’s lying sick in the water

i don't care if you're here legally and i do not care what you buy with SNAP. you could not pay me to care!!!

might be one of the funniest videos i’ve ever seen

waking up and groggily trying to piece together what people could possibly mean by “trump diarrhea video” i hate this world

Searching "gifts for men" to figure out what to tell people to buy me for my birthday.