Saddam tha Jizzler
@saddam-tha-jizzler.bsky.social
follow me if you enjoy being surprised whether the next post will be middle east commentary or dick/shit jokes
AI pfp = block
AI pfp = block
Pinned
If u doomscroll hard enough, it will make ur parents retroactively have loved u. psychiatrists don’t want u to know this one trick
Reposted by Saddam tha Jizzler
god lost the earth's login credentials after being catfished by tocharian scammers ca. 730 CE. these "South Qunduz Mischief Boys" spent years using them for infantile pranks like adding water to earth's mantle or resurrecting the extinct coelocanth. the last of them passed away no later than 800 CE
October 14, 2025 at 1:09 AM
god lost the earth's login credentials after being catfished by tocharian scammers ca. 730 CE. these "South Qunduz Mischief Boys" spent years using them for infantile pranks like adding water to earth's mantle or resurrecting the extinct coelocanth. the last of them passed away no later than 800 CE
Did u know that molesting his sister turned Sam Altman gay? Human sexuality is crazy
Annie Altman’s Abuse Allegations Against OpenAI’s Now-Fired CEO Sam Altman Highlight the Need to Prioritize Humanity Over Tech
www.themarysue.com/annie-altman...
www.themarysue.com/annie-altman...
Annie Altman Abuse Allegations Against Sam Altman, Explained | The Mary Sue
OpenAI CEO Sam Altman's sister Annie has seemingly come to social media multiple times, most recently in October 2023, with allegations about him.
www.themarysue.com
November 7, 2025 at 9:13 PM
Did u know that molesting his sister turned Sam Altman gay? Human sexuality is crazy
Reposted by Saddam tha Jizzler
it's because nurse is the feminized version of the "post-high school bully" career path (cop is the masculinized version).
November 5, 2025 at 11:44 PM
it's because nurse is the feminized version of the "post-high school bully" career path (cop is the masculinized version).
Reposted by Saddam tha Jizzler
for real lead is a great paint additive! it makes it go on smoother and slicker so you can use less paint to cover the same area, and use less strokes to smooth it out when you fuck up. it's a shame that some stupid kids had to eat it and ruin lead paint for the real paint heads.
November 5, 2025 at 11:38 PM
for real lead is a great paint additive! it makes it go on smoother and slicker so you can use less paint to cover the same area, and use less strokes to smooth it out when you fuck up. it's a shame that some stupid kids had to eat it and ruin lead paint for the real paint heads.
people are always accusing me of writing "gay pornography". in this essay i will
[rest of essay is entirely gay pornography]
[rest of essay is entirely gay pornography]
November 5, 2025 at 10:15 PM
people are always accusing me of writing "gay pornography". in this essay i will
[rest of essay is entirely gay pornography]
[rest of essay is entirely gay pornography]
Review of tonight’s delivery driving
November 2, 2025 at 1:19 AM
Review of tonight’s delivery driving
Reposted by Saddam tha Jizzler
there should be no toilets inside the white house. every time the president needs to shit, he should have to find a nearby gas station or see if there's a portapotty in lafayette park
October 31, 2025 at 10:53 PM
there should be no toilets inside the white house. every time the president needs to shit, he should have to find a nearby gas station or see if there's a portapotty in lafayette park
Buboe would be a pretty name for a girl
October 29, 2025 at 3:20 PM
Buboe would be a pretty name for a girl
JavaScript was a net negative for humanity
October 28, 2025 at 9:26 PM
JavaScript was a net negative for humanity
Earlier tonight, I got an order that ended on my street. “Oh nice,” I thought, “I’ll knock off now and just drive a couple blocks home.” Then I get the receipt and they tipped FOUR fucking dollars for me to drive their KFC 12 miles?! I should walk over there and burn their house down
October 25, 2025 at 1:59 AM
Earlier tonight, I got an order that ended on my street. “Oh nice,” I thought, “I’ll knock off now and just drive a couple blocks home.” Then I get the receipt and they tipped FOUR fucking dollars for me to drive their KFC 12 miles?! I should walk over there and burn their house down
if you’re a 50-yo man with quirked-up blood pressure, call our life insurance shawties today
October 24, 2025 at 11:53 PM
if you’re a 50-yo man with quirked-up blood pressure, call our life insurance shawties today
Reposted by Saddam tha Jizzler
maybe it's just autism, but idgi. the white house remodeling thing is surely illegal in terms of permitting, and surely the resulting 'ballroom' will be ugly as shit. but on the scale of 'trump wrecking the country' this is like the least interesting/important thing.
It’s far from the most important thing, morally right now, or in terms of the human stakes, but the ballroom thing is really breaking my brain.
October 22, 2025 at 10:18 PM
maybe it's just autism, but idgi. the white house remodeling thing is surely illegal in terms of permitting, and surely the resulting 'ballroom' will be ugly as shit. but on the scale of 'trump wrecking the country' this is like the least interesting/important thing.
Be the big cat your kitty wants to see in the world
October 22, 2025 at 3:24 PM
Be the big cat your kitty wants to see in the world
Reposted by Saddam tha Jizzler
Tonight’s terrible UberEats alcohol order. The lady who ordered this also asked me to come to the “side window” where she had propped up a mattress next to the window and handed me her ID through the open window while laying down.
October 17, 2025 at 1:23 AM
Tonight’s terrible UberEats alcohol order. The lady who ordered this also asked me to come to the “side window” where she had propped up a mattress next to the window and handed me her ID through the open window while laying down.
warty comb jellies have a "transient anus", so imagine how hard it would be to fuck them in the butt
October 16, 2025 at 5:20 AM
warty comb jellies have a "transient anus", so imagine how hard it would be to fuck them in the butt
Reposted by Saddam tha Jizzler
when all is said and done it looks reasonably likely that bin laden will have taken down not just the us but the entire west
October 16, 2025 at 4:28 AM
when all is said and done it looks reasonably likely that bin laden will have taken down not just the us but the entire west
Reposted by Saddam tha Jizzler
Tad - God’s Balls
I guess this actually came out in 89, but it definitely feels 90s to me in how much it prefigured grunge blowing up. These guys got did a disservice by how much the music press coverage was like “wow! these backwoods hicks made an album!” But it’s a real solid heavy rock album.
I guess this actually came out in 89, but it definitely feels 90s to me in how much it prefigured grunge blowing up. These guys got did a disservice by how much the music press coverage was like “wow! these backwoods hicks made an album!” But it’s a real solid heavy rock album.
October 15, 2025 at 11:40 PM
Tad - God’s Balls
I guess this actually came out in 89, but it definitely feels 90s to me in how much it prefigured grunge blowing up. These guys got did a disservice by how much the music press coverage was like “wow! these backwoods hicks made an album!” But it’s a real solid heavy rock album.
I guess this actually came out in 89, but it definitely feels 90s to me in how much it prefigured grunge blowing up. These guys got did a disservice by how much the music press coverage was like “wow! these backwoods hicks made an album!” But it’s a real solid heavy rock album.
8 out of 10 doctors who smoke weed say it’s probably fine to smoke resin too “what’s the worst that could happen” said one
October 14, 2025 at 3:13 AM
8 out of 10 doctors who smoke weed say it’s probably fine to smoke resin too “what’s the worst that could happen” said one
internecine conflict on the codes of Smurfdom
October 10, 2025 at 9:09 PM
internecine conflict on the codes of Smurfdom
Reposted by Saddam tha Jizzler
yeah i'm in my harvest festival arc. i'm harvestpilled (smoking the weed i harvested a few days ago)
October 8, 2025 at 11:33 PM
yeah i'm in my harvest festival arc. i'm harvestpilled (smoking the weed i harvested a few days ago)
yeah i'm in my harvest festival arc. i'm harvestpilled (smoking the weed i harvested a few days ago)
October 8, 2025 at 11:33 PM
yeah i'm in my harvest festival arc. i'm harvestpilled (smoking the weed i harvested a few days ago)
Reposted by Saddam tha Jizzler
I agree but I would add that the “adult things” I would like to see are like people getting killed by aliens, people getting killed by the predator, people fucking and then the predator finds and kills them,
There should be way more comics about adults doing adult things. Most people are adults.
Anyone have a particularly hot comic take?
October 5, 2025 at 2:43 AM
I agree but I would add that the “adult things” I would like to see are like people getting killed by aliens, people getting killed by the predator, people fucking and then the predator finds and kills them,
Reposted by Saddam tha Jizzler
So now maybe we’re ready for Advanced Delivery Driving Theory. Clever students will have already noticed a few implications of the thread below; the first one is that drivers can guess when you tipped $0. I personally never deliver to $0 tippers.
I feel like I should explain some basics about how the gig delivery game works for all of my followers with real jobs. So when you put in your order for your little treats, potential drivers who have the app on get a pop-up in the app.
October 7, 2025 at 5:51 AM
So now maybe we’re ready for Advanced Delivery Driving Theory. Clever students will have already noticed a few implications of the thread below; the first one is that drivers can guess when you tipped $0. I personally never deliver to $0 tippers.