Macaulay Sulkin
@macaulaysulkin.bsky.social
King Motherfucker of Motherfucktopia
Was Mr. Big on Sex and the City just Jeffery Epstein? What are you hiding Carrie? What are you hiding?
December 7, 2025 at 4:34 AM
Was Mr. Big on Sex and the City just Jeffery Epstein? What are you hiding Carrie? What are you hiding?
Reposted by Macaulay Sulkin
I have in my hands definitive evidence that my opponent has committed a world-historic evil. Evidence that, were it to be released to the public, would cause his supporters to abandon him and his entire world to crumble to dust. I therefore have no choice but to give in to every one of his demands
November 12, 2025 at 5:30 PM
I have in my hands definitive evidence that my opponent has committed a world-historic evil. Evidence that, were it to be released to the public, would cause his supporters to abandon him and his entire world to crumble to dust. I therefore have no choice but to give in to every one of his demands
God wanted a place where everyone is a mall cop drunk with power and said "Let there be London" and he saw that it was just okay
September 20, 2025 at 4:55 AM
God wanted a place where everyone is a mall cop drunk with power and said "Let there be London" and he saw that it was just okay
Charlie Kirk was assassinated by Sallie Mae for going to college for 25 years and never graduating
September 10, 2025 at 8:12 PM
Charlie Kirk was assassinated by Sallie Mae for going to college for 25 years and never graduating
My new favorite thing is libs saying that the supreme court ruling is unconstitutional when it's perfectly constitutional specifically because libs were too chickenshit to pass constitutional amendments that would have prevented everything the Trump admin is doing.
September 9, 2025 at 11:01 PM
My new favorite thing is libs saying that the supreme court ruling is unconstitutional when it's perfectly constitutional specifically because libs were too chickenshit to pass constitutional amendments that would have prevented everything the Trump admin is doing.
Why do they call it hentai and not gooney tunes?
September 7, 2025 at 4:19 AM
Why do they call it hentai and not gooney tunes?
You don't see people doing the pull my finger gag like you used to
September 2, 2025 at 7:03 AM
You don't see people doing the pull my finger gag like you used to
Gavin Newsom is polling at record numbers with the "I do not consent to Facebook looking at my photos" crowd
August 25, 2025 at 5:06 PM
Gavin Newsom is polling at record numbers with the "I do not consent to Facebook looking at my photos" crowd
"Our base is furious at us for losing to fascism a second time and they feel like they're floundering in an ever worsening hell. Our plan? Never talk about it. Especially not the concentration camps"
It would be a huge step forward for Democrats and for general clarity in political writing if these terms went away. These came mostly from academic hothouses.
August 25, 2025 at 1:15 AM
"Our base is furious at us for losing to fascism a second time and they feel like they're floundering in an ever worsening hell. Our plan? Never talk about it. Especially not the concentration camps"
A great way to tell who is going to start calling the concentration camps "detention centers" after a democrat is in office again and they're all still operational is to find people who currently say shit like "Cankles McTaco Tits"
August 24, 2025 at 3:31 AM
A great way to tell who is going to start calling the concentration camps "detention centers" after a democrat is in office again and they're all still operational is to find people who currently say shit like "Cankles McTaco Tits"
I bet Brian Wilson fuckin loved Animal Collective
August 15, 2025 at 6:17 AM
I bet Brian Wilson fuckin loved Animal Collective
Reposted by Macaulay Sulkin
Patient, sobbing: But Doctor, I AM Pagliacci!
ChatGPT: Apologies. I didn't realise when recommending Pagliacci's epic show to cure your depression that you were the genius himself. I'm impressed! With regards to your initial question, I can recommend seeing the Great Clown Pagliacci.
ChatGPT: Apologies. I didn't realise when recommending Pagliacci's epic show to cure your depression that you were the genius himself. I'm impressed! With regards to your initial question, I can recommend seeing the Great Clown Pagliacci.
August 7, 2025 at 11:31 AM
Patient, sobbing: But Doctor, I AM Pagliacci!
ChatGPT: Apologies. I didn't realise when recommending Pagliacci's epic show to cure your depression that you were the genius himself. I'm impressed! With regards to your initial question, I can recommend seeing the Great Clown Pagliacci.
ChatGPT: Apologies. I didn't realise when recommending Pagliacci's epic show to cure your depression that you were the genius himself. I'm impressed! With regards to your initial question, I can recommend seeing the Great Clown Pagliacci.
Nothing makes a boring white man feel smarter than refusing to explain what he's talking about so he can sound smart while not having to know what he's talking about. Real win-win for the weed cousin set
July 8, 2025 at 5:42 AM
Nothing makes a boring white man feel smarter than refusing to explain what he's talking about so he can sound smart while not having to know what he's talking about. Real win-win for the weed cousin set
Reposted by Macaulay Sulkin
One thing that makes Young Frankenstein a 10/10 movie is that if you remade it with the exact same plot played completely straight it would still be an S Tier Frankenstein movie. The people demand Hammer Young Frankenstein.
May 10, 2025 at 3:57 AM
One thing that makes Young Frankenstein a 10/10 movie is that if you remade it with the exact same plot played completely straight it would still be an S Tier Frankenstein movie. The people demand Hammer Young Frankenstein.
The most disappointing thing about the digital age is the profound lack of doohickeys and gizmos. I'm sick of gadgets, give me a thingamabob or a doodad
May 4, 2025 at 3:13 AM
The most disappointing thing about the digital age is the profound lack of doohickeys and gizmos. I'm sick of gadgets, give me a thingamabob or a doodad
Reposted by Macaulay Sulkin
BLOATED CORPSE OF A DRUNK - You really dropped the ball, Harry. Four point six billion people -- and you failed every single one of them. You really *fucked up*.
April 21, 2025 at 1:20 AM
BLOATED CORPSE OF A DRUNK - You really dropped the ball, Harry. Four point six billion people -- and you failed every single one of them. You really *fucked up*.
On the downside literally everything is collapsing and the US is on the verge of martial law. On the upside millennial Forrest Gump is about to get rich
After years of struggling to compete with cheaper, farm-raised imported shrimp, shrimpers from Florida to Louisiana, who have been hit in recent years by fuel costs and natural and man-made disasters, are optimistic that President Trump's tariffs will help them.
Gulf Coast Shrimpers See Hope in Trump’s Tariffs
After years struggling to compete with cheaper, farm-raised imported shrimp, shrimpers from Florida to Louisiana are optimistic that the new tariffs will help them.
www.nytimes.com
April 8, 2025 at 1:44 AM
On the downside literally everything is collapsing and the US is on the verge of martial law. On the upside millennial Forrest Gump is about to get rich
Reposted by Macaulay Sulkin
The Onion needs to get back to doing satire
April 7, 2025 at 1:56 AM
The Onion needs to get back to doing satire
Going to go to a Michelin star restaurant and order wet food
April 6, 2025 at 11:18 PM
Going to go to a Michelin star restaurant and order wet food
They say your worst day sober is better than your best day drinking but on my best days drinking I was employed and loved so maybe there some wiggle room with that one Bill
April 3, 2025 at 8:58 PM
They say your worst day sober is better than your best day drinking but on my best days drinking I was employed and loved so maybe there some wiggle room with that one Bill
Reposted by Macaulay Sulkin
donald trump is a fascist who is going to take over our government and ruin the entire country forever and end democracy and not let us vote ever again which is why we have to give him everything he wants
March 14, 2025 at 3:43 AM
donald trump is a fascist who is going to take over our government and ruin the entire country forever and end democracy and not let us vote ever again which is why we have to give him everything he wants
Reposted by Macaulay Sulkin
YOU - I don't want to be this kind of animal anymore.
March 3, 2025 at 5:45 PM
YOU - I don't want to be this kind of animal anymore.
Reposted by Macaulay Sulkin
Biden couldn't raise the minimum wage by .02¢ because the Senate parliamentarian pursed their lips, but Trump can radically remake the entire government by fiat and somehow this is all the fault of 15 autistic communists on Bsky
February 17, 2025 at 6:43 AM
Biden couldn't raise the minimum wage by .02¢ because the Senate parliamentarian pursed their lips, but Trump can radically remake the entire government by fiat and somehow this is all the fault of 15 autistic communists on Bsky
If I can't get a job in my field and move back to St. Louis by the end of June I am going to take out a loan, drink until the money is gone, and jump off the old chain of rocks bridge
February 17, 2025 at 9:55 PM
If I can't get a job in my field and move back to St. Louis by the end of June I am going to take out a loan, drink until the money is gone, and jump off the old chain of rocks bridge