Lew Morton
@lewmorton.bsky.social
I am a TV comedy writer. B&B Do The Universe, VEEP, Silicon Valley, Futurama, NewsRadio, SNL, others too numerous (or not that good) to mention. Currently Beavis and Butt-Head series.
PSA: When people say you have to read the Lizza thing to the end, they mean only read the last sentence
November 18, 2025 at 3:17 AM
PSA: When people say you have to read the Lizza thing to the end, they mean only read the last sentence
The Nuzzi excerpts do nothing to dispel the theory that what’s going on with her is severe mental illness
November 18, 2025 at 1:29 AM
The Nuzzi excerpts do nothing to dispel the theory that what’s going on with her is severe mental illness
Trump right now finding out he sucked off the wrong Bubba
November 15, 2025 at 5:01 AM
Trump right now finding out he sucked off the wrong Bubba
Reposted by Lew Morton
I made a joke in my main Discord server about DOOM E1M1 being in a major key and @abigbagofkeys.sickonedude.com actually made it. Jesus fucking Christ listen to this hahahaha
November 14, 2025 at 1:47 PM
I made a joke in my main Discord server about DOOM E1M1 being in a major key and @abigbagofkeys.sickonedude.com actually made it. Jesus fucking Christ listen to this hahahaha
Megyn Kelly crying herself to sleep because she doesn’t have a dick to rape a 15-year-old with
November 14, 2025 at 3:47 PM
Megyn Kelly crying herself to sleep because she doesn’t have a dick to rape a 15-year-old with
Motherfucker never exercised in his life
JD Vance calls ibuprofen "useless medication" and implies it's not "necessary, safe and effective."
November 12, 2025 at 10:58 PM
Motherfucker never exercised in his life
Epstein should have had one of those underage girls teach him to use the space bar
November 12, 2025 at 6:57 PM
Epstein should have had one of those underage girls teach him to use the space bar
If it's already required by law, how is this new law supposed to help?
November 10, 2025 at 1:21 AM
If it's already required by law, how is this new law supposed to help?
Make a 10000 year mortgage, you coward
November 9, 2025 at 4:48 PM
Make a 10000 year mortgage, you coward
Reposted by Lew Morton
Fortunately, the Sandwich Guy didn't try throwing one from the vending machine at WNYX. That could have been a felony charge.
November 6, 2025 at 7:41 PM
Fortunately, the Sandwich Guy didn't try throwing one from the vending machine at WNYX. That could have been a felony charge.
Ross Douthat has one idea, that people shouldn’t fuck, and everything else flows downhill from that.
He couldn’t get laid in college, convinced himself he was taking a bold moral stand, and now he’s this asshole.
He couldn’t get laid in college, convinced himself he was taking a bold moral stand, and now he’s this asshole.
November 6, 2025 at 3:35 PM
Ross Douthat has one idea, that people shouldn’t fuck, and everything else flows downhill from that.
He couldn’t get laid in college, convinced himself he was taking a bold moral stand, and now he’s this asshole.
He couldn’t get laid in college, convinced himself he was taking a bold moral stand, and now he’s this asshole.
Niemoller fella may have had a point
The Jewish right discovering in real time that the Trumpist right, and the open bigotries it has unleashed upon the US body politic, is not in fact going to spare Jews, is quite a trip.
October 31, 2025 at 2:32 PM
Niemoller fella may have had a point
Reposted by Lew Morton
Anyone who did comedy development in the 90s/early 00s knows that, no matter what you pitched, the network would try to turn it into this exact show.
AI sitcom accidentally a Lynchian fever dream. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and insane lament.
October 30, 2025 at 3:45 AM
Anyone who did comedy development in the 90s/early 00s knows that, no matter what you pitched, the network would try to turn it into this exact show.
Clap your hands!
October 29, 2025 at 4:29 AM
Clap your hands!
Reposted by Lew Morton
Let’s goooo my union!! @wgawest.bsky.social 💪
Writers Guild plans to oppose Paramount-Warner Bros merger, Bloomberg News reports reut.rs/47ArjKh
Writers Guild plans to oppose Paramount-Warner Bros merger, Bloomberg News reports
The Writers Guild of America, which represents screenwriters and newsroom staffers, said it will oppose a deal combining Paramount Skydance and Warner Bros Discovery , Bloomberg News reported on Thursday.
reut.rs
October 24, 2025 at 2:36 AM
Let’s goooo my union!! @wgawest.bsky.social 💪
French incels get laid 24-7
This photo accompanying a news story about the heist at the Louvre is perfection.
October 20, 2025 at 4:03 AM
French incels get laid 24-7
The Eagles won, and I'm not even that angry at them!
October 19, 2025 at 8:29 PM
The Eagles won, and I'm not even that angry at them!
"The average high school graduate are only fucks Olivia Nuzzi at an eighth-grade level"
RFK Jr: "Today the average teenager in this country has 50% of the sperm count, 50% of the testosterone of a 65 year old man. Our girls are hitting puberty 6 years early ... our parents aren't having children."
October 17, 2025 at 12:51 AM
"The average high school graduate are only fucks Olivia Nuzzi at an eighth-grade level"
Olivia Nuzzi looks pretty fertile, maybe this one's on you, pal
RFK Jr: "When my uncle was president, the fertility rate in this country was 3.5%. Today it is 1.6%. The replacement rate -- in other words the amount of fertility you need to keep your population even -- is 2.1%. We are below replacement. That is a national security threat to our country."
October 16, 2025 at 11:22 PM
Olivia Nuzzi looks pretty fertile, maybe this one's on you, pal
Every time a Kennedy dies, the amount of fucking that happens in the US is cut in half
RFK Jr: "When my uncle was president, the fertility rate in this country was 3.5%. Today it is 1.6%. The replacement rate -- in other words the amount of fertility you need to keep your population even -- is 2.1%. We are below replacement. That is a national security threat to our country."
October 16, 2025 at 11:19 PM
Every time a Kennedy dies, the amount of fucking that happens in the US is cut in half
Reposted by Lew Morton
If you’re like me, you sat up on your chair when S-tier character actor Kevin Tighe turned up in ONE BATTLE AFTER ANOTHER. I had a wonderful conversation with him about it for The Reveal: thereveal.film/interview-ke...
Interview: Kevin Tighe on ‘One Battle After Another’ and a great career on stage and screen
The great character actor talks about his return to the screen in 'One Battle After Another' and a half-century journey in the business.
thereveal.film
October 15, 2025 at 2:28 PM
If you’re like me, you sat up on your chair when S-tier character actor Kevin Tighe turned up in ONE BATTLE AFTER ANOTHER. I had a wonderful conversation with him about it for The Reveal: thereveal.film/interview-ke...
Just as after 9/11, we're going to track down who is responsible and send Dave Chappelle and Aziz Ansari to their house
"Scott Bessent said that his department is launching a War on Terror-style campaign against progressive nonprofits."
“Charlie’s death is like a domestic 9/11,” Bessent said. “Just as after 9/11, and Osama bin Laden... was captured... we are going to track down who is responsible for this.”
“Charlie’s death is like a domestic 9/11,” Bessent said. “Just as after 9/11, and Osama bin Laden... was captured... we are going to track down who is responsible for this.”
Big Talk: Treasury Secretary Declares New War on Terror Against the Left
Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent said on Tuesday that his department is in...
talkingpointsmemo.com
October 15, 2025 at 6:39 PM
Just as after 9/11, we're going to track down who is responsible and send Dave Chappelle and Aziz Ansari to their house
We’re in the first five minutes of a zombie movie
October 11, 2025 at 5:55 PM
We’re in the first five minutes of a zombie movie
It's a good feeling knowing your work can still inspire crime
Nocturnal intruder compared to 'Cornholio' causing fear on the southeast side
After repeated home break-in attempts, a homeowner is seeking police action, worried about escalating violence.
www.kens5.com
October 8, 2025 at 12:11 AM
It's a good feeling knowing your work can still inspire crime