everyday I am happier that I am child free
April 23, 2025 at 11:38 PM
everyday I am happier that I am child free
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Tonight we’ll be having beef bourguignon
*sloshes red wine into a pan of Hamburger Helper*
*sloshes red wine into a pan of Hamburger Helper*
April 22, 2025 at 7:07 PM
Tonight we’ll be having beef bourguignon
*sloshes red wine into a pan of Hamburger Helper*
*sloshes red wine into a pan of Hamburger Helper*
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RIP to the dude who taught me the word for f@ggotry in Italian. Weird not being Catholic but having a favorite pope, but as a gay person he was about as good as it has ever been. Hope they don't elect somebody the tradcath converts like!
April 21, 2025 at 1:00 PM
RIP to the dude who taught me the word for f@ggotry in Italian. Weird not being Catholic but having a favorite pope, but as a gay person he was about as good as it has ever been. Hope they don't elect somebody the tradcath converts like!
People are finishing 2 @chilis triple dippers at once?!
April 17, 2025 at 11:24 PM
People are finishing 2 @chilis triple dippers at once?!
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Whoever came up with "are you from Tennessee bc you're the only ten I see" really ate that
March 1, 2025 at 4:07 AM
Whoever came up with "are you from Tennessee bc you're the only ten I see" really ate that
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VA BADDIES REUNION IN NYC WOOHOO LETS GO
February 13, 2025 at 9:24 PM
VA BADDIES REUNION IN NYC WOOHOO LETS GO
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[first date]
her: I’m a cashier at a bank
me: so, a “fortune teller”?
her:
me:
her: outlook not so good
me: will you marry me
her: I’m a cashier at a bank
me: so, a “fortune teller”?
her:
me:
her: outlook not so good
me: will you marry me
January 21, 2025 at 3:37 PM
[first date]
her: I’m a cashier at a bank
me: so, a “fortune teller”?
her:
me:
her: outlook not so good
me: will you marry me
her: I’m a cashier at a bank
me: so, a “fortune teller”?
her:
me:
her: outlook not so good
me: will you marry me
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When you're yelling at me. This is who you're yelling at: 😭
January 13, 2025 at 8:19 PM
When you're yelling at me. This is who you're yelling at: 😭
Good morning, my puppy is 14 today!
January 11, 2025 at 3:06 PM
Good morning, my puppy is 14 today!
Random: "OMG you work at (redacted)! What is your #1 skincare tip?"
Me: "you should be applying sunscreen everyday."
Random: "No, not that, what else?"
Me: 🙃🙃🙃
Me: "you should be applying sunscreen everyday."
Random: "No, not that, what else?"
Me: 🙃🙃🙃
January 8, 2025 at 5:40 PM
Random: "OMG you work at (redacted)! What is your #1 skincare tip?"
Me: "you should be applying sunscreen everyday."
Random: "No, not that, what else?"
Me: 🙃🙃🙃
Me: "you should be applying sunscreen everyday."
Random: "No, not that, what else?"
Me: 🙃🙃🙃
Do dogs & cats think humans are weird because we wear clothes?
January 5, 2025 at 11:14 PM
Do dogs & cats think humans are weird because we wear clothes?
are you OK?! with friends like these, who needs enemies?
Paid $55 for groceries for one dinner at a house where I'm a guest I literally felt every South Asian family shiver in shock
January 4, 2025 at 2:37 AM
are you OK?! with friends like these, who needs enemies?
I'm intrigued by people who install a flag pole and don't follow the U.S. flag code
December 31, 2024 at 5:09 PM
I'm intrigued by people who install a flag pole and don't follow the U.S. flag code
Today at work someone described Hozier's "Too Sweet" as a step above elevator music.
December 30, 2024 at 2:42 AM
Today at work someone described Hozier's "Too Sweet" as a step above elevator music.
I have been sick for a month straight, I AM OVER IT
December 27, 2024 at 5:57 PM
I have been sick for a month straight, I AM OVER IT
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With respect: Anyone who says Beyonce is overrated is not a serious person. Vocal mastery, performance level, & showmanship are measurable. If you don't acknowledge her skill, you are either not a musician or you have ulterior motives for tearing her down. You don't have to be a fan to recognize.
December 26, 2024 at 9:37 PM
With respect: Anyone who says Beyonce is overrated is not a serious person. Vocal mastery, performance level, & showmanship are measurable. If you don't acknowledge her skill, you are either not a musician or you have ulterior motives for tearing her down. You don't have to be a fan to recognize.
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They're coming in on Christmas Eve too like please have some discernment.
people who go & get foundation matched on Black Friday are so funny to me! Why would you pick the busiest day to do something so involved?
December 24, 2024 at 4:50 PM
They're coming in on Christmas Eve too like please have some discernment.
Adding to our prev. discussion, Beyonce also gets punished for her brilliance. Because CC did well, the response is "of course, she's Beyonce". Had that album flopped she would've been ridiculed. It's the same reasoning behind why she has so many Grammys but not AOTY. Plus a good dose of misogynoir.
If we are talking about Black culture in music, Cowboy Carter revived Black musicians in country music and directly impacted multiple Black country artists and elevated them to mainstream. Shaboozys record breaking run being just one of the success stories of CC.
December 24, 2024 at 6:12 AM
Adding to our prev. discussion, Beyonce also gets punished for her brilliance. Because CC did well, the response is "of course, she's Beyonce". Had that album flopped she would've been ridiculed. It's the same reasoning behind why she has so many Grammys but not AOTY. Plus a good dose of misogynoir.
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when cats curl up so much their faces go upside down rt if you agree
December 23, 2024 at 10:39 PM
when cats curl up so much their faces go upside down rt if you agree
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Beef Wellington is just a corn dog from a different socioeconomic background.
December 22, 2024 at 2:17 AM
Beef Wellington is just a corn dog from a different socioeconomic background.
I can't believe how many people walk around with hickies on their neck
December 22, 2024 at 12:52 AM
I can't believe how many people walk around with hickies on their neck
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the year is 2034. there are thousands of specialty accounts on twitter. stair guy. smell doctor. cutlery gal. sports them. liquor baby. chef raccoon. finally, men can no longer post any photo without being criticized.
December 17, 2024 at 7:04 PM
the year is 2034. there are thousands of specialty accounts on twitter. stair guy. smell doctor. cutlery gal. sports them. liquor baby. chef raccoon. finally, men can no longer post any photo without being criticized.
one like & I'll buy my American Girl doll the mini target shopping cart
December 15, 2024 at 6:31 PM
one like & I'll buy my American Girl doll the mini target shopping cart