Auntie Em
@emofjohnson.bsky.social
Fortysomething. Aging Greebo.
Messy Bench. Lemonade Socialist.
North England born living in That London.
Never knowingly without a to do list.
Messy Bench. Lemonade Socialist.
North England born living in That London.
Never knowingly without a to do list.
Deal or No Deal is mental.
Why has the banker put money in boxes? Why is he trying to buy those boxes back?
What's the point in all this?
Why has the banker put money in boxes? Why is he trying to buy those boxes back?
What's the point in all this?
January 22, 2025 at 4:22 PM
Deal or No Deal is mental.
Why has the banker put money in boxes? Why is he trying to buy those boxes back?
What's the point in all this?
Why has the banker put money in boxes? Why is he trying to buy those boxes back?
What's the point in all this?
Reposted by Auntie Em
In case anyone hasn't read Neil Gaiman's statement, I've summarised it: "I did nothing wrong but also I've been carefully reflecting on the wrong I didn't do and trying to make sure I definitely don't do it, for the first time, in future."
January 15, 2025 at 10:09 AM
In case anyone hasn't read Neil Gaiman's statement, I've summarised it: "I did nothing wrong but also I've been carefully reflecting on the wrong I didn't do and trying to make sure I definitely don't do it, for the first time, in future."
I really am not sure I have the ability to do anything today.
January 10, 2025 at 7:41 AM
I really am not sure I have the ability to do anything today.
I'm very cross that Evri haven't delivered my Only Curls package.
January 9, 2025 at 10:11 PM
I'm very cross that Evri haven't delivered my Only Curls package.
Reposted by Auntie Em
“Autoglass® repair, Autoglass® replace”
January 6, 2025 at 7:33 PM
“Autoglass® repair, Autoglass® replace”
I feel like three weeks in bed would sort me right out.
January 6, 2025 at 2:14 PM
I feel like three weeks in bed would sort me right out.
I need someone to take care of me. Just for a week. I am failing at eating / drinking / moving.
January 4, 2025 at 7:17 PM
I need someone to take care of me. Just for a week. I am failing at eating / drinking / moving.
Reposted by Auntie Em
I keep thinking about the "21 types of spunk in his stomach" school rumour and wondering how or why the medical team would seek to identify the provenance of the spunk.
January 1, 2025 at 1:17 PM
I keep thinking about the "21 types of spunk in his stomach" school rumour and wondering how or why the medical team would seek to identify the provenance of the spunk.
I am really looking forward to my bed
December 31, 2024 at 4:30 PM
I am really looking forward to my bed
Reposted by Auntie Em
"And just like that, the cauliflower cheese left my body and my gutrot finally eased."
December 30, 2024 at 1:00 PM
"And just like that, the cauliflower cheese left my body and my gutrot finally eased."
Mummy are you watching.
Yes, I'm watching you flood the bathroom.
Yes, I'm watching you flood the bathroom.
December 30, 2024 at 6:40 PM
Mummy are you watching.
Yes, I'm watching you flood the bathroom.
Yes, I'm watching you flood the bathroom.
This was quality
It's RATMAS!
Enjoy a rat-themed festive bonus episode. Someone has already emailed to say that it made them vomit so do gird yourself.
pod.link/1564066507/e...
Enjoy a rat-themed festive bonus episode. Someone has already emailed to say that it made them vomit so do gird yourself.
pod.link/1564066507/e...
December 30, 2024 at 6:39 PM
This was quality
The Elf Storage is back on the A4.
Christmas is coming.
🎁🎁🤶🎄🎅🎁🎁
Christmas is coming.
🎁🎁🤶🎄🎅🎁🎁
December 17, 2024 at 4:59 PM
The Elf Storage is back on the A4.
Christmas is coming.
🎁🎁🤶🎄🎅🎁🎁
Christmas is coming.
🎁🎁🤶🎄🎅🎁🎁
Reposted by Auntie Em
the perfect rating doesn't exi......
📽️
📽️
December 14, 2024 at 10:30 PM
the perfect rating doesn't exi......
📽️
📽️
Reposted by Auntie Em
The SANTA PLEASE STOP HERE signs really annoy me. Guys, he’s done the list, he’s packed the gear. This is a guy who lives and breathes logistics. Too late for this bullshit
December 14, 2024 at 11:50 PM
The SANTA PLEASE STOP HERE signs really annoy me. Guys, he’s done the list, he’s packed the gear. This is a guy who lives and breathes logistics. Too late for this bullshit
What do I want for Christmas? I want someone to roll me out like pastry.
Unkink my entire body.
Unkink my entire body.
December 14, 2024 at 7:47 PM
What do I want for Christmas? I want someone to roll me out like pastry.
Unkink my entire body.
Unkink my entire body.
If I could do anything.
Cup of hot black coffee.
Soft blanket up to my neck.
Long old nap in our rocking chair.
I'm gagging for a nap.
Cup of hot black coffee.
Soft blanket up to my neck.
Long old nap in our rocking chair.
I'm gagging for a nap.
December 11, 2024 at 8:14 PM
If I could do anything.
Cup of hot black coffee.
Soft blanket up to my neck.
Long old nap in our rocking chair.
I'm gagging for a nap.
Cup of hot black coffee.
Soft blanket up to my neck.
Long old nap in our rocking chair.
I'm gagging for a nap.
If someone is in a hostel they are technically homeless.
I’ve reported on homelessness for years and met many, many people who have found themselves in awful situations
Every single one of them had more decency and integrity than this privileged plutocrat
Every single one of them had more decency and integrity than this privileged plutocrat
December 11, 2024 at 7:29 PM
If someone is in a hostel they are technically homeless.
Reposted by Auntie Em
Hello, I drink red wine, I also live in a house with light coloured carpets along with a 2-year old boy, I use and endorse Vanish 3-in-1 Carpet Foam Deep Cleaner, I seek sponsorship.
December 11, 2024 at 7:25 PM
Hello, I drink red wine, I also live in a house with light coloured carpets along with a 2-year old boy, I use and endorse Vanish 3-in-1 Carpet Foam Deep Cleaner, I seek sponsorship.
I'd give anything for a nap.
December 11, 2024 at 6:17 PM
I'd give anything for a nap.
Going past Fuller's and saying "I quite fancy a brewery tour".
I think I'm a middle aged woman.
I think I'm a middle aged woman.
December 4, 2024 at 11:21 AM
Going past Fuller's and saying "I quite fancy a brewery tour".
I think I'm a middle aged woman.
I think I'm a middle aged woman.
Arrrgggghhhh!!!! Bloody Uber cancelled a minute before it was due.
Waiting on another one.
Funnily enough people can't be late for cancer treatment. Don't be a dick and cancel jobs.
Waiting on another one.
Funnily enough people can't be late for cancer treatment. Don't be a dick and cancel jobs.
December 3, 2024 at 3:03 PM
Arrrgggghhhh!!!! Bloody Uber cancelled a minute before it was due.
Waiting on another one.
Funnily enough people can't be late for cancer treatment. Don't be a dick and cancel jobs.
Waiting on another one.
Funnily enough people can't be late for cancer treatment. Don't be a dick and cancel jobs.
Reposted by Auntie Em
You...
Vill...
Be...
.
.
.
Dracula
You're gonna be Dracuuᵘᵘlaaaa
I'll give you the bloody fangs
You'll dismember gangs
Turn into dirty piles of rats
Vill...
Be...
.
.
.
Dracula
You're gonna be Dracuuᵘᵘlaaaa
I'll give you the bloody fangs
You'll dismember gangs
Turn into dirty piles of rats
December 1, 2024 at 7:51 PM
You...
Vill...
Be...
.
.
.
Dracula
You're gonna be Dracuuᵘᵘlaaaa
I'll give you the bloody fangs
You'll dismember gangs
Turn into dirty piles of rats
Vill...
Be...
.
.
.
Dracula
You're gonna be Dracuuᵘᵘlaaaa
I'll give you the bloody fangs
You'll dismember gangs
Turn into dirty piles of rats
I think I'm a woman of a certain age.
I'm very excited to be a part of something.
I'm very excited to be a part of something.
December 2, 2024 at 10:33 AM
I think I'm a woman of a certain age.
I'm very excited to be a part of something.
I'm very excited to be a part of something.
Reposted by Auntie Em
Been to B&Q to get some titles for my self-published romance novels.
November 22, 2024 at 10:11 AM
Been to B&Q to get some titles for my self-published romance novels.