The single most important qualification for fighting Trump’s agenda is having been a teenager during the doo-wop boom. Democratic leadership understands this

Errands are for mornings in my opinion. Once the clock has struck noon it's time to start "settling in" on the way to winding down time (8 pm) followed of course by bedtime (10 pm)

5'11'' is such an earnest, sincere height... you see I'm not the sort to round up by even one inch... I'm an honest man trying to make an honest living in a naughty world...

Going into a field far away from my or anyone else's phone to verbally express how I feel about the United Healthcare CEO.

Get rotated idiot. Get absolutely spun

I am listening. I am learning. I am becoming more dangerous

2024 was the year i finally learned how to comprehend the german mind. 2025 will be the year i finally comprehend the italian mind

Wife’s out of town so you KNOW I’m keeping a night light on in case monsters

say what you want about the corrosive effects of social media, we live in a golden age of doomscrolling. any time in history before 20 years ago that you wanted an alternative way to express your dark thoughts, you were stuck writing it in a diary or scrawling a lewd joke on the side of the taverna

not a gun fan but i bet if dyson made a gun it would look so cool

liberals go insane reading the footnotes on 538 and the cross-tabs from Marist and conservatives believe in the invisible hand of the casino

well son if you work hard in school and get good grades one day you'll get paid to make powerpoints people forget the moment they're done looking at them

Karl Marx failed to consider the dinger