Christi Green
@cmgreen86.bsky.social
Twin mom. Recovering Baptist. Amateur potter. Disabled ADHDer working in tech. she/her #ROC
Pinned
Christi Green
@cmgreen86.bsky.social
· Oct 22
Going to do that shameless self promotion thing here, because I'm looking to start selling my ceramics and I have my first batch of earrings ready to go (with many more in the works!). If anyone is interested in one of these pairs of handmade earrings send me a DM. $40 includes shipping in US!
Reposted by Christi Green
HELLO IT'S BLACK FRIDAY
Instead of a sale this year I'm giving 10% of Black Friday weekend sales to @distributeaid.org for their harm reduction toolkits that provide safe injection supplies to trans people taking hormones.
nora.jewelry
#bsnm
Instead of a sale this year I'm giving 10% of Black Friday weekend sales to @distributeaid.org for their harm reduction toolkits that provide safe injection supplies to trans people taking hormones.
nora.jewelry
#bsnm
November 28, 2025 at 1:48 PM
HELLO IT'S BLACK FRIDAY
Instead of a sale this year I'm giving 10% of Black Friday weekend sales to @distributeaid.org for their harm reduction toolkits that provide safe injection supplies to trans people taking hormones.
nora.jewelry
#bsnm
Instead of a sale this year I'm giving 10% of Black Friday weekend sales to @distributeaid.org for their harm reduction toolkits that provide safe injection supplies to trans people taking hormones.
nora.jewelry
#bsnm
My child has progressed from yesterday's stomach bug to repeatedly spiking a fever today. I foresee a house full of germs will complicate Thanksgiving this year. Love that for me!
November 23, 2025 at 5:35 PM
My child has progressed from yesterday's stomach bug to repeatedly spiking a fever today. I foresee a house full of germs will complicate Thanksgiving this year. Love that for me!
Evergreen post, but Bill Maher can go [redacted thing that would get me in bluesky time out].
PATTON OSWALT: These people are scared. They're being targeted. We're watching them be targeted right now. We're watching transgender people be targeted in a very aggressive way, so—
BILL MAHER: We are? Where?
OSWALT: Oh my god.
MAHER: Where are they being targeted?
BILL MAHER: We are? Where?
OSWALT: Oh my god.
MAHER: Where are they being targeted?
November 20, 2025 at 11:53 PM
Evergreen post, but Bill Maher can go [redacted thing that would get me in bluesky time out].
AMAZING.
a very important PSA for millennial parents of young toddlers:
November 20, 2025 at 5:23 PM
AMAZING.
Rocky gets nervous when the Bills score, but he doesn't mind getting constant pets (to keep him from going ballistic when my husband yells excitedly at the TV). That was a helluva game y'all!
November 16, 2025 at 9:32 PM
Rocky gets nervous when the Bills score, but he doesn't mind getting constant pets (to keep him from going ballistic when my husband yells excitedly at the TV). That was a helluva game y'all!
Close mom friend of mine threw her back out folding laundry this last week. Getting old is a real bitch!
Getting older: I threw my back out while I was working out at the gym.
Getting much older: I threw my back out while I was flossing.
Getting much older: I threw my back out while I was flossing.
November 16, 2025 at 8:12 PM
Close mom friend of mine threw her back out folding laundry this last week. Getting old is a real bitch!
My husband is going to the casino this afternoon and I am taking the children to the Museum of Play. Solo.
I am already regretting this choice. Help.
I am already regretting this choice. Help.
November 15, 2025 at 4:24 PM
My husband is going to the casino this afternoon and I am taking the children to the Museum of Play. Solo.
I am already regretting this choice. Help.
I am already regretting this choice. Help.
I guess the upside is when the Jesus AI inevitably starts telling people to blow shit up or something, there will be a log of the conversation....
The app Text With Jesus uses artificial intelligence and chatbots to offer spiritual guidance to users who are looking to connect with a higher power: on.nbc10.com/7XM8xrf
People can text with Jesus on a controversial new app. How does it work?
Artificial intelligence app Text With Jesus lets users chat with biblical figures and it is raising debate over faith and technology.
on.nbc10.com
November 15, 2025 at 12:33 AM
I guess the upside is when the Jesus AI inevitably starts telling people to blow shit up or something, there will be a log of the conversation....
When I was maybe 8-10 years old, I built a house for my cat out of scrap wood and did a HELL of a lot better with a hammer than this goddamn yahoo. Pinnacle of masculinity, where??
True comedy is watching Dave Portnay trying to use a hammer
November 14, 2025 at 11:33 PM
When I was maybe 8-10 years old, I built a house for my cat out of scrap wood and did a HELL of a lot better with a hammer than this goddamn yahoo. Pinnacle of masculinity, where??
She is beauty, she is grace. She's a fucking pain in the ass to clean up after.
(Is she... Me?)
(Is she... Me?)
November 11, 2025 at 5:38 PM
She is beauty, she is grace. She's a fucking pain in the ass to clean up after.
(Is she... Me?)
(Is she... Me?)
Mom come pick me up this isn't fun anymore....
a man in a pink shirt is talking to another man with the words zero fun sir written below them
ALT: a man in a pink shirt is talking to another man with the words zero fun sir written below them
media.tenor.com
November 9, 2025 at 7:58 PM
Mom come pick me up this isn't fun anymore....
I can only imagine the come to Jesus meeting that's happening in that goddamn locker room right now. JFC this game.
November 9, 2025 at 7:36 PM
I can only imagine the come to Jesus meeting that's happening in that goddamn locker room right now. JFC this game.
I adore my Japanese maple this time of year. Much less so when there's a foot of snow on the ground and the bitch still hasn't dropped all her leaves!
my Japanese maple woke up this morning and decided to flex
November 9, 2025 at 7:28 PM
I adore my Japanese maple this time of year. Much less so when there's a foot of snow on the ground and the bitch still hasn't dropped all her leaves!
Plying my kids with finger foods to get them to tolerate football.
Let's go Buffalo!!!
Let's go Buffalo!!!
November 9, 2025 at 6:17 PM
Plying my kids with finger foods to get them to tolerate football.
Let's go Buffalo!!!
Let's go Buffalo!!!
This is also how you end up with holiday staples like It Nearly Wasn't Christmas that feel like a fever dream because you spend over a decade trying to find a terrible copy of it on YouTube
November 9, 2025 at 1:51 AM
This is also how you end up with holiday staples like It Nearly Wasn't Christmas that feel like a fever dream because you spend over a decade trying to find a terrible copy of it on YouTube
Someone wants his two front teeth for Christmas!!!
October 26, 2025 at 11:43 PM
Someone wants his two front teeth for Christmas!!!
Reposted by Christi Green
Going to do that shameless self promotion thing here, because I'm looking to start selling my ceramics and I have my first batch of earrings ready to go (with many more in the works!). If anyone is interested in one of these pairs of handmade earrings send me a DM. $40 includes shipping in US!
October 22, 2025 at 4:56 PM
Going to do that shameless self promotion thing here, because I'm looking to start selling my ceramics and I have my first batch of earrings ready to go (with many more in the works!). If anyone is interested in one of these pairs of handmade earrings send me a DM. $40 includes shipping in US!
Going to do that shameless self promotion thing here, because I'm looking to start selling my ceramics and I have my first batch of earrings ready to go (with many more in the works!). If anyone is interested in one of these pairs of handmade earrings send me a DM. $40 includes shipping in US!
October 22, 2025 at 4:56 PM
Going to do that shameless self promotion thing here, because I'm looking to start selling my ceramics and I have my first batch of earrings ready to go (with many more in the works!). If anyone is interested in one of these pairs of handmade earrings send me a DM. $40 includes shipping in US!
One mental trick I've used for my twins, unconsciously or not, is to keep their things on the same side they occupied in the womb. So baby B on the left and baby A on the right. At some point recently, I told my boys this in conversation and didn't really think more about it than that.
October 13, 2025 at 6:54 PM
One mental trick I've used for my twins, unconsciously or not, is to keep their things on the same side they occupied in the womb. So baby B on the left and baby A on the right. At some point recently, I told my boys this in conversation and didn't really think more about it than that.
I am seething with secondhand rage over this. People have had COLLAPSED LUNGS from endometriosis, that shit will end up wherever the fuck it wants, Murphy's Law style. It encases appendixes (appendices??) just for funzies. We've all encountered at least one of these but goddamn!
okay okay I’ll be fair, she didn’t point blank call me stupid, she just visibly rolled her eyes and then exaggeratedly gestured to my pelvis and said “endo is in your PELVIS, not your ABDOMEN”
one of us is stupid here but it’s not me. I am pissed off tho
one of us is stupid here but it’s not me. I am pissed off tho
October 13, 2025 at 3:07 PM
I am seething with secondhand rage over this. People have had COLLAPSED LUNGS from endometriosis, that shit will end up wherever the fuck it wants, Murphy's Law style. It encases appendixes (appendices??) just for funzies. We've all encountered at least one of these but goddamn!
Reposted by Christi Green
ok confession time
I’ve been in the ICU for most of the last week & I’m struggling so so so hard
the doctor has suggested I
get a dog to help me, but I cannot afford the cost of a hypoallergenic dog, let alone the cost of a service dog
do we think this is even worth the attempt to fundraise? y/n
I’ve been in the ICU for most of the last week & I’m struggling so so so hard
the doctor has suggested I
get a dog to help me, but I cannot afford the cost of a hypoallergenic dog, let alone the cost of a service dog
do we think this is even worth the attempt to fundraise? y/n
October 12, 2025 at 10:43 PM
ok confession time
I’ve been in the ICU for most of the last week & I’m struggling so so so hard
the doctor has suggested I
get a dog to help me, but I cannot afford the cost of a hypoallergenic dog, let alone the cost of a service dog
do we think this is even worth the attempt to fundraise? y/n
I’ve been in the ICU for most of the last week & I’m struggling so so so hard
the doctor has suggested I
get a dog to help me, but I cannot afford the cost of a hypoallergenic dog, let alone the cost of a service dog
do we think this is even worth the attempt to fundraise? y/n
This essay smells like the GCCIS computer labs circa 2005-2009
I'm going to start calling essays like this "odes to whiteness" because the underlying premise is that they are like this because they don't anticipate any social cost to smelling bad.
This one is v. frustrating because it tries to lump in perfumes with the broader (problematic) beauty industry
This one is v. frustrating because it tries to lump in perfumes with the broader (problematic) beauty industry
October 11, 2025 at 12:15 PM
This essay smells like the GCCIS computer labs circa 2005-2009
Very confusing listening to the new Motion City Soundtrack and YouTube Music keeps skipping "You Know Who the Fuck We Are." I went through the album SEVERAL times, mostly in the car, and thought I was just missing it somehow! Just give me the swears, godDAMN.
October 8, 2025 at 3:29 PM
Very confusing listening to the new Motion City Soundtrack and YouTube Music keeps skipping "You Know Who the Fuck We Are." I went through the album SEVERAL times, mostly in the car, and thought I was just missing it somehow! Just give me the swears, godDAMN.
Deeply tired of the corporate urge to use the phrase "___ will be in touch to discuss next steps."
Please be more intentionally vague jesus fucking christ
Please be more intentionally vague jesus fucking christ
October 7, 2025 at 6:07 PM
Deeply tired of the corporate urge to use the phrase "___ will be in touch to discuss next steps."
Please be more intentionally vague jesus fucking christ
Please be more intentionally vague jesus fucking christ
This fucking game. Jesus Christ.
October 6, 2025 at 2:32 AM
This fucking game. Jesus Christ.