albrr (it’s cold outside)
@captainacab.airbud.website
not really a dog. reposts = official CDC recommendations. he/him
CDC style guide: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaamfdxuzasv6
CDC style guide: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaamfdxuzasv6
Pinned
keep talkin asshole i’m pinning this entire thread
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
they're introducing a new level of following: tolerate
December 27, 2025 at 5:04 AM
they're introducing a new level of following: tolerate
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
I hate Boxing Day. Too violent.
December 26, 2025 at 6:43 PM
I hate Boxing Day. Too violent.
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
Jamiroquai when Jamiro vewwy sad
December 23, 2025 at 5:19 PM
Jamiroquai when Jamiro vewwy sad
to put this in perspective, stranger things has been in production since donald trump eas in office the first time
December 27, 2025 at 4:22 AM
to put this in perspective, stranger things has been in production since donald trump eas in office the first time
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
dear diary,
can i see a picture of your pussy from the front and one from the back
can i see a picture of your pussy from the front and one from the back
December 27, 2025 at 4:09 AM
dear diary,
can i see a picture of your pussy from the front and one from the back
can i see a picture of your pussy from the front and one from the back
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
Tonight on bluesky: did either avatar or the black panther party have a lasting impact on society? White men are weighing in vociferously
December 27, 2025 at 3:47 AM
Tonight on bluesky: did either avatar or the black panther party have a lasting impact on society? White men are weighing in vociferously
sorry but i just can’t get into it. i’ve always viewed avatar the movie as a cultural appropriation of the blue man group
December 27, 2025 at 3:37 AM
sorry but i just can’t get into it. i’ve always viewed avatar the movie as a cultural appropriation of the blue man group
instead of running a popular campaign that people want to support, you should be online telling people to drink bleach and that the economy is really really good. literally everyone knows this is how you win
December 27, 2025 at 3:19 AM
instead of running a popular campaign that people want to support, you should be online telling people to drink bleach and that the economy is really really good. literally everyone knows this is how you win
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
I was super smug that I managed to get someone on the chess app to resign, until I looked at their username again and saw that it was “AubreyIs16”
December 27, 2025 at 2:21 AM
I was super smug that I managed to get someone on the chess app to resign, until I looked at their username again and saw that it was “AubreyIs16”
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
"pwease don't attack me for insulting your girlfriend mr onion man"
December 27, 2025 at 2:16 AM
"pwease don't attack me for insulting your girlfriend mr onion man"
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
if you walk outside and ask the first stranger you meet if they know who will stancil is they will say no, and then if you push further and ask if they want to hear some will stancil opinions they will have already walked away
December 27, 2025 at 12:34 AM
if you walk outside and ask the first stranger you meet if they know who will stancil is they will say no, and then if you push further and ask if they want to hear some will stancil opinions they will have already walked away
[getting into sparkling water]
day one: wow i love how pure the plain one tastes, i don’t think ill ever go back
1 week later: oh they have flavored?
2 months later: hey honey, they’re having a 3 for $18 sale on coke zero six packs so i went ahead and got 6
day one: wow i love how pure the plain one tastes, i don’t think ill ever go back
1 week later: oh they have flavored?
2 months later: hey honey, they’re having a 3 for $18 sale on coke zero six packs so i went ahead and got 6
December 27, 2025 at 12:25 AM
[getting into sparkling water]
day one: wow i love how pure the plain one tastes, i don’t think ill ever go back
1 week later: oh they have flavored?
2 months later: hey honey, they’re having a 3 for $18 sale on coke zero six packs so i went ahead and got 6
day one: wow i love how pure the plain one tastes, i don’t think ill ever go back
1 week later: oh they have flavored?
2 months later: hey honey, they’re having a 3 for $18 sale on coke zero six packs so i went ahead and got 6
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
those screams you hear floating over the frozen snowfields are santa, being shoved back into his holding cell after yet another year of doing the elves dirty work. his body is growing weaker. the elves know that. soon a blood sacrifice will be required
December 26, 2025 at 2:25 PM
those screams you hear floating over the frozen snowfields are santa, being shoved back into his holding cell after yet another year of doing the elves dirty work. his body is growing weaker. the elves know that. soon a blood sacrifice will be required
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
in 2026, please do not speak to me any more about protein.
December 26, 2025 at 9:36 PM
in 2026, please do not speak to me any more about protein.
MIA is a an absolutely perfect name for a one hit wonder band
December 26, 2025 at 10:39 PM
MIA is a an absolutely perfect name for a one hit wonder band
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
[Heated Rivalry finale on Christmas]
you know who else felt a holy spirit enter him?
you know who else felt a holy spirit enter him?
December 25, 2025 at 10:18 PM
[Heated Rivalry finale on Christmas]
you know who else felt a holy spirit enter him?
you know who else felt a holy spirit enter him?
those screams you hear floating over the frozen snowfields are santa, being shoved back into his holding cell after yet another year of doing the elves dirty work. his body is growing weaker. the elves know that. soon a blood sacrifice will be required
December 26, 2025 at 2:25 PM
those screams you hear floating over the frozen snowfields are santa, being shoved back into his holding cell after yet another year of doing the elves dirty work. his body is growing weaker. the elves know that. soon a blood sacrifice will be required
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
let me see that thon
holy shit they did it
December 26, 2025 at 6:15 AM
let me see that thon
holy shit they did it
December 26, 2025 at 5:51 AM
holy shit they did it
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
trying to make small talk at the kids birthday party
“so, are you guys a toyotathon or a hondadays family”
“so, are you guys a toyotathon or a hondadays family”
November 12, 2024 at 4:54 AM
trying to make small talk at the kids birthday party
“so, are you guys a toyotathon or a hondadays family”
“so, are you guys a toyotathon or a hondadays family”
*hand to my earpiece*
uhhhhh ,ok you aren’t gonna believe this
uhhhhh ,ok you aren’t gonna believe this
I really hope the dummies over there accidentally do the kind of redacting that’s just highlighting black text in black, easily retrievable, there’s like a 50% chance.
BREAKING: Trump signs a bill to release files on Jeffrey Epstein, bowing to political pressure after months of resistance.
December 26, 2025 at 3:10 AM
*hand to my earpiece*
uhhhhh ,ok you aren’t gonna believe this
uhhhhh ,ok you aren’t gonna believe this
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
I really hope the dummies over there accidentally do the kind of redacting that’s just highlighting black text in black, easily retrievable, there’s like a 50% chance.
BREAKING: Trump signs a bill to release files on Jeffrey Epstein, bowing to political pressure after months of resistance.
Trump signs bill to release Jeffrey Epstein case files after fighting it for months
President Donald Trump has signed a bill to release files on convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein.
bit.ly
November 20, 2025 at 2:08 AM
I really hope the dummies over there accidentally do the kind of redacting that’s just highlighting black text in black, easily retrievable, there’s like a 50% chance.
Reposted by albrr (it’s cold outside)
Die Hard was actually appropriated from pagans
December 26, 2025 at 1:59 AM
Die Hard was actually appropriated from pagans
2026 is the year i finally stop using humor as a defense mechanism, most likely
December 26, 2025 at 2:52 AM
2026 is the year i finally stop using humor as a defense mechanism, most likely