@amancalledsplorg.bsky.social
Might get fired next week. I'll lyk i guess lol
January 10, 2025 at 12:07 AM
Might get fired next week. I'll lyk i guess lol
Target is just biding its time until I've stolen a thousand dollars worth of plastic grocery bags
January 7, 2025 at 9:15 PM
Target is just biding its time until I've stolen a thousand dollars worth of plastic grocery bags
Reposted
Coffee for what we can change, cannabis for what we can’t.
December 30, 2024 at 3:17 PM
Coffee for what we can change, cannabis for what we can’t.
Reposted
Problematic director list:
– Spielberg (abused dinosaurs)
– Aster (won’t return my emails about muppet midsommar)
– Villeneuve (French Canadian)
– Spielberg (abused dinosaurs)
– Aster (won’t return my emails about muppet midsommar)
– Villeneuve (French Canadian)
December 15, 2024 at 8:05 PM
Problematic director list:
– Spielberg (abused dinosaurs)
– Aster (won’t return my emails about muppet midsommar)
– Villeneuve (French Canadian)
– Spielberg (abused dinosaurs)
– Aster (won’t return my emails about muppet midsommar)
– Villeneuve (French Canadian)
Fallout franchise: you are the apex predator of a fallen world. Do drugs, have fun, get revenge.
Colony Ship: you are a rat on a sinking vessel. Every moment you draw breath in these rusted corridors is a blessing. Watch out for frogs.
Colony Ship: you are a rat on a sinking vessel. Every moment you draw breath in these rusted corridors is a blessing. Watch out for frogs.
December 12, 2024 at 4:43 PM
Fallout franchise: you are the apex predator of a fallen world. Do drugs, have fun, get revenge.
Colony Ship: you are a rat on a sinking vessel. Every moment you draw breath in these rusted corridors is a blessing. Watch out for frogs.
Colony Ship: you are a rat on a sinking vessel. Every moment you draw breath in these rusted corridors is a blessing. Watch out for frogs.
Reposted
Nick Fuentes of your body my choice fame has been arrested for spraying a woman in the face with mace.
Maybe he can see how his slogan works in jail.
Maybe he can see how his slogan works in jail.
December 6, 2024 at 8:55 PM
Nick Fuentes of your body my choice fame has been arrested for spraying a woman in the face with mace.
Maybe he can see how his slogan works in jail.
Maybe he can see how his slogan works in jail.
Reposted
attention NYPD: I have identified the united ceo shooter as "Jesse Singal". He is heavily armed and was last overheard saying "I will smoke any pig in my path on sight". I hope this information leads to his apprehension dead or alive.
December 6, 2024 at 9:50 PM
attention NYPD: I have identified the united ceo shooter as "Jesse Singal". He is heavily armed and was last overheard saying "I will smoke any pig in my path on sight". I hope this information leads to his apprehension dead or alive.
Reposted
BREAKING: Infamous white nationalist Nick Fuentes is charged with battery after he allegedly pepper-sprayed and shoved a 57-year-old woman to the ground for showing up at his house.
He's set to appear in court on December 19th.
Like and share if you hope that he's convicted!
He's set to appear in court on December 19th.
Like and share if you hope that he's convicted!
December 6, 2024 at 8:08 PM
BREAKING: Infamous white nationalist Nick Fuentes is charged with battery after he allegedly pepper-sprayed and shoved a 57-year-old woman to the ground for showing up at his house.
He's set to appear in court on December 19th.
Like and share if you hope that he's convicted!
He's set to appear in court on December 19th.
Like and share if you hope that he's convicted!
SNL has always been bad at punchlines, but they would've been well served to take a leaf out of Monty Python's playbook: have the gayest member of the cast dress up like a military officer and shout at the audience that the skit is both dumb and over.
December 6, 2024 at 6:39 PM
SNL has always been bad at punchlines, but they would've been well served to take a leaf out of Monty Python's playbook: have the gayest member of the cast dress up like a military officer and shout at the audience that the skit is both dumb and over.
Reposted
The whole internet loves the anonymous assassin who got away with offing a health insurance CEO
*five seconds later*
We are excited to report that the assassin is cute
*five seconds later*
We are excited to report that the assassin is cute
December 5, 2024 at 11:18 PM
The whole internet loves the anonymous assassin who got away with offing a health insurance CEO
*five seconds later*
We are excited to report that the assassin is cute
*five seconds later*
We are excited to report that the assassin is cute
Reposted
To avoid disappointment, take people exactly as they are, instead of idealizing about what you wish they would be.
December 5, 2024 at 1:42 PM
To avoid disappointment, take people exactly as they are, instead of idealizing about what you wish they would be.
Reposted
Three things are true:
1) Green bell peppers are just crunchy water.
2) Poblanos are what green bell peppers should be.
3) Any dish that utilizes green bell peppers would be made better by substituting poblanos.
1) Green bell peppers are just crunchy water.
2) Poblanos are what green bell peppers should be.
3) Any dish that utilizes green bell peppers would be made better by substituting poblanos.
December 4, 2024 at 10:58 PM
Three things are true:
1) Green bell peppers are just crunchy water.
2) Poblanos are what green bell peppers should be.
3) Any dish that utilizes green bell peppers would be made better by substituting poblanos.
1) Green bell peppers are just crunchy water.
2) Poblanos are what green bell peppers should be.
3) Any dish that utilizes green bell peppers would be made better by substituting poblanos.
Reached the bottom of the feed. Back now!
December 5, 2024 at 8:20 PM
Reached the bottom of the feed. Back now!
Reposted
Pixar rejected my Up sequel Down. Carl tying boulders to his house to drag it underground so he can rescue Ellie from hell “didn’t make sense” according to the suits. “Why is Ellie in hell? She didn’t commit any sins.” Yes she did, hubris
December 5, 2024 at 3:32 PM
Pixar rejected my Up sequel Down. Carl tying boulders to his house to drag it underground so he can rescue Ellie from hell “didn’t make sense” according to the suits. “Why is Ellie in hell? She didn’t commit any sins.” Yes she did, hubris
It's really too bad they're never going to find that guy huh...
December 5, 2024 at 8:13 PM
It's really too bad they're never going to find that guy huh...
Oh to beat a motherfucker's ass in the manner of a swan...
December 5, 2024 at 8:05 PM
Oh to beat a motherfucker's ass in the manner of a swan...
A clue! But to what...
#splorgthoughts
#splorgthoughts
December 5, 2024 at 7:18 PM
A clue! But to what...
#splorgthoughts
#splorgthoughts
Duolingo Owl's less successful brother, Monosyllable Owl
December 5, 2024 at 6:55 PM
Duolingo Owl's less successful brother, Monosyllable Owl
Beautiful scammers pls stop following me. I am stupid and horny, but I am also very poor.
December 4, 2024 at 11:41 PM
Beautiful scammers pls stop following me. I am stupid and horny, but I am also very poor.
Reposted
Last winter you put a little pillow on top of the radiator for me. Last year you loved me more I guess, that’s ok it’s totally fine. I’m fine
December 3, 2024 at 8:19 PM
Last winter you put a little pillow on top of the radiator for me. Last year you loved me more I guess, that’s ok it’s totally fine. I’m fine
Reposted
if she’s squeamish about getting her hands and face sticky eating ribs she probably won’t do that thing you like
December 1, 2024 at 4:44 PM
if she’s squeamish about getting her hands and face sticky eating ribs she probably won’t do that thing you like
Reposted
Reposted
More men need to tell us they've never been a fan of The Beatles. It shows an independence of thought but also profound intellectual insight; a refusal to run with the herd. I especially like to see it in response to someone expressing their love of the group. It's outspoken, contrary and brave.
December 1, 2024 at 8:48 PM
More men need to tell us they've never been a fan of The Beatles. It shows an independence of thought but also profound intellectual insight; a refusal to run with the herd. I especially like to see it in response to someone expressing their love of the group. It's outspoken, contrary and brave.