AlohaPedro
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alohapedro.bsky.social
AlohaPedro
@alohapedro.bsky.social
Eater/breather/lover/fighter
Please help me fulfill my dream of casting spells on children who infiltrate my future cottage in the woods
Reposted by AlohaPedro
When we invented cricket around 911 CE, about 400 years before the English, we had unruly matches that sadly ended in several brawls & murders. The Icelandic Sagas documented the lot. Since we introduced our Code of Conduct in 2020, the number of deaths in play has dropped a lot.
September 19, 2025 at 12:22 PM
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[everybody suddenly remembering why they called him The Prince of Darkness, but somehow not seeing that this calls their own judgment into question]
@hackneyabbott.bsky.social : "Peter Mandelson apparently is very bitter and twisted. He thinks the prime ministers failed him, and a bitter and twisted Pater Mandelson who knows stuff is not a Peter Mandelson you want out there" #GMB
September 15, 2025 at 7:07 AM
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So you’re telling me the Wizard of Oz presented itself as a towering force of overwhelming technology, only to be unmasked as just some guy, off-screen?
So apparently, it may turn out that The Wizard of Oz at the Las Vegas Sphere wasn’t entirely made in AI and Google threw the VFX crew under the bus by claiming it was all done by artificial intelligence.

If true, then fucking yikes.
August 5, 2025 at 3:02 PM
I'm catching up on the Sewing Bee, I'm gutted Peter left! I wanted to see more of his construction garms!
August 3, 2025 at 1:24 PM
Someone in my block has been playing bangers all day, and currently listening to Luther Vandross 'Stop to love'
July 25, 2025 at 4:41 PM
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Ghislaine Maxwell Can’t Help But Notice Interview Room Covered In Plastic Sheeting
Ghislaine Maxwell Can’t Help But Notice Interview Room Covered In Plastic Sheeting
TALLAHASSEE, FL—Perplexed that the Department of Justice had chosen a setting with such strange decor to ask her about Jeffrey Epstein’s co-conspirators, Ghislaine Maxwell confirmed Thursday that she ...
theonion.com
July 24, 2025 at 7:31 PM
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I’m no expert but I would’ve got a person to do it.
July 9, 2025 at 12:39 PM
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Marjorie Taylor Greene doesn't want you to know the name of her opponent but will try every desperate attempt to save her seat.

My name is Shawn Harris. I am a Democrat, husband, father, Retired Brigadier General, farmer, and I'm running against MTG. Can you spread the word?
June 30, 2025 at 11:24 PM
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why is the president the only person testing the limits of his power? everyone should see what they can get away with. what if zookeepers gave helicopters to gorillas? nobody has tried this
June 10, 2025 at 2:50 AM
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It’s the happiest day of Elon Musk’s life because he finally posted something people actually want to read
June 5, 2025 at 8:12 PM
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Does he not realize this is making Ireland sound like the only sane country in Europe? Nobody is even debating anymore that Israel is committing genocide
June 4, 2025 at 12:17 PM
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hello! i'm selling some original watercolor paintings. they're all about 4x6" postcard size. i take venmo, zelle, or paypal. let me know in the comments if you're interested and keep your dm open or leave your email so i can get in touch-- i plan to ship in the next week or so. price incl shipping
May 21, 2025 at 1:20 AM
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i actually don't care if people call it genocide, but if you spent several months angrily tut-tutting people about their disagreeable language while denying what was actually happening and then you just went silent, well....
BREAKING: The Israeli military has issued forced evacuation orders for Khan Younis, Gaza’s second-largest city, warning there will be an “unprecedented attack”.

🔴 LIVE updates: aje.io/7w6uku
May 19, 2025 at 10:12 AM
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oops, looks like someone's been caught using their massive propaganda machine to do south african white genocide propaganda.
May 15, 2025 at 8:40 AM
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hahahah
May 14, 2025 at 2:26 PM
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jazz is about the notes you don't play. the very best jazz musicians have never touched an instrument at all
May 10, 2025 at 11:09 PM
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I’m an alpha male I tell myself before nervously answering a phone call from my dentist
May 3, 2025 at 6:47 PM
Saw Sinners... the rest of my weekend is now filled with watching people's breakdowns of the themes 🎉🎂
April 26, 2025 at 5:45 PM
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*reading your palm* see this line here, that one means i’m going to kill if you you don’t stop chewing with your mouth open
April 24, 2025 at 11:00 AM
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and of course an all-time demolition a few posts down from that one
April 22, 2025 at 2:31 AM
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Attending church without good works is absolutely a sin.
St. Paul got exactly one thing right: praying in public is an affront to God.
Performed religion does the opposite of what religion is supposed to do.
Worship can be a vessel we drink from but it's not the water. God abides in smaller things.
April 17, 2025 at 1:04 PM
I think everyone should start saying that Trump is too weak to bring Garcia home, and that it can't be done. The orange moron will try to do it immediately (if he's still alive)
April 13, 2025 at 4:43 PM
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🧵 I'd like to summarize Jeremiah's errors visually, since his constant arguing muddied the waters.

1. He claimed that since the sound of ס /s/ and צ /sˤ/ are similar, they're interchangeable. As any student of Biblical Hebrew knows, this is colossally incorrect.
December 26, 2024 at 10:51 PM
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Received another email from the local council asking me to refrain from doling out riddles and stay away from all nearby bridges 🙄
April 13, 2025 at 6:21 AM
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Luka Doncic was tearing up during the Mavs' tribute video to him 💔
April 9, 2025 at 11:45 PM