aRealHumanBartender
@alltomato1717.bsky.social
genX/human/OFMD nerd/real estate novelist/potato/idiot 🏴☠️
she/her
https://archiveofourown.org/users/aRealHumanBartender
she/her
https://archiveofourown.org/users/aRealHumanBartender
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen
(too hard)
- Dean Johnson!
- Anais Mitchell
- Suitcase Junket
- Lemonheads
- Dinosaur Jr
(&the big guys: u2, jane’s, beasties, billy joel but that was a lifetime ago)
(too hard)
- Dean Johnson!
- Anais Mitchell
- Suitcase Junket
- Lemonheads
- Dinosaur Jr
(&the big guys: u2, jane’s, beasties, billy joel but that was a lifetime ago)
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you've seen
Madness
Pulp (also a solo Jarvis Cocker tour)
Jello Biafra
Laura Jane Grace & the Devouring Mothers (supported by Murder by Death - the last gig I saw before the pandemic began)
The Porkers (probly the band I've seen live the most)
Madness
Pulp (also a solo Jarvis Cocker tour)
Jello Biafra
Laura Jane Grace & the Devouring Mothers (supported by Murder by Death - the last gig I saw before the pandemic began)
The Porkers (probly the band I've seen live the most)
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen
Foo Fighters
Oasis
Crowded House
Pearl Jam
Bastille
Foo Fighters
Oasis
Crowded House
Pearl Jam
Bastille
November 29, 2025 at 11:03 PM
Introduce yourself with 5 concerts you’ve seen
(too hard)
- Dean Johnson!
- Anais Mitchell
- Suitcase Junket
- Lemonheads
- Dinosaur Jr
(&the big guys: u2, jane’s, beasties, billy joel but that was a lifetime ago)
(too hard)
- Dean Johnson!
- Anais Mitchell
- Suitcase Junket
- Lemonheads
- Dinosaur Jr
(&the big guys: u2, jane’s, beasties, billy joel but that was a lifetime ago)
all of the ways
I was naive and blind
she was my girl
but I shouldn’t say mine
I was naive and blind
she was my girl
but I shouldn’t say mine
November 29, 2025 at 2:16 PM
all of the ways
I was naive and blind
she was my girl
but I shouldn’t say mine
I was naive and blind
she was my girl
but I shouldn’t say mine
one bed trope ftw
November 28, 2025 at 10:05 PM
one bed trope ftw
love when this happens! Cracked into the new collection by Charles Rafferty (Appendectomy Grin) and there is my beloved Troy dam! The Troy dam is the furthermost point of saltwater Hudson, and a million other things💓💓💓
November 28, 2025 at 8:51 PM
love when this happens! Cracked into the new collection by Charles Rafferty (Appendectomy Grin) and there is my beloved Troy dam! The Troy dam is the furthermost point of saltwater Hudson, and a million other things💓💓💓
Reposted by aRealHumanBartender
that one Thanksgiving I was working retail and got the flu from kissing my co-worker in Washington Park
New Old Friend
archiveofourown.org/works/55060894
New Old Friend
archiveofourown.org/works/55060894
New Session | Archive of Our Own
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
archiveofourown.org
November 28, 2025 at 2:31 PM
that one Thanksgiving I was working retail and got the flu from kissing my co-worker in Washington Park
New Old Friend
archiveofourown.org/works/55060894
New Old Friend
archiveofourown.org/works/55060894
Reposted by aRealHumanBartender
James Bond, GI Joe, and most of the western news media of my childhood tried to convince me/us that the US & UK were the western epitome of free speech and liberty, fending off a censorious, repressive east that banned dissident ideas.
They lied.
They lied.
If you’re going to shop today, buy a Sally Rooney novel while you still can. www.bbc.com/news/article...
Sally Rooney books may be withdrawn from UK sale over Palestine Action ban, court told
Rooney has said she intended to use royalties from her work "to go on supporting Palestine Action."
www.bbc.com
November 28, 2025 at 12:43 PM
James Bond, GI Joe, and most of the western news media of my childhood tried to convince me/us that the US & UK were the western epitome of free speech and liberty, fending off a censorious, repressive east that banned dissident ideas.
They lied.
They lied.
sorry sorry ARealHumanBartender piece is a hot mess, no quotation marks, little to no smut bc I don’t know how, using specific, real locations and abusing the soundtrack sorry sorry
Recurring tragicallynerdy things: pining while fucking, over use of the words 'soft' 'tender' 'lovely', Jim can't cook, injuries and angst :) , Canadian spelling, very detailed smut, 0 descriptions of place/space, all the italics, Jim rare ships, queering religon
Thank you Abs for a fun lil meme!!!
Thank you Abs for a fun lil meme!!!
recurring abs fic things: oatmilk, stede gets nose kisses, dolphin hatred, men crying, no sex at the climax even if its rated E, no caps on proper nouns, “this rocks”, repeating homonyms or two words spelled the same that mean something different, hm tell me if i missed any or quote w ur own!
November 28, 2025 at 12:21 AM
sorry sorry ARealHumanBartender piece is a hot mess, no quotation marks, little to no smut bc I don’t know how, using specific, real locations and abusing the soundtrack sorry sorry
oh hahahahahaha
November 27, 2025 at 2:39 PM
oh hahahahahaha
How boring everything would be without you all! Thankful for you every day💓
November 27, 2025 at 12:08 PM
How boring everything would be without you all! Thankful for you every day💓
Reposted by aRealHumanBartender
Saw this comic and had to make it about Stede
November 27, 2025 at 11:56 AM
Saw this comic and had to make it about Stede
all the kids are home and out shouting one another and my
daughter has her friends here to watch Stranger Things and it’s so loud the dog’s ears are twitching
daughter has her friends here to watch Stranger Things and it’s so loud the dog’s ears are twitching
November 27, 2025 at 12:11 AM
all the kids are home and out shouting one another and my
daughter has her friends here to watch Stranger Things and it’s so loud the dog’s ears are twitching
daughter has her friends here to watch Stranger Things and it’s so loud the dog’s ears are twitching
Duchess potatoes ✅
November 26, 2025 at 5:14 PM
Duchess potatoes ✅
so much dumb domestic shit to do today but let me tell you I’ll be turning over this insane story idea I had last night while I do most of it🤣
November 26, 2025 at 1:04 PM
so much dumb domestic shit to do today but let me tell you I’ll be turning over this insane story idea I had last night while I do most of it🤣
Reposted by aRealHumanBartender
in your 40s there will be a flag and it’s very important to know that is means death
November 25, 2025 at 7:30 PM
in your 40s there will be a flag and it’s very important to know that is means death
Reposted by aRealHumanBartender
Random shuffle tryin to kill me here
November 25, 2025 at 2:09 PM
Random shuffle tryin to kill me here
The mom in me is so strong that seeing Rhys’ insta at all those places in Vegas I’m not like omg he’s so cute, I’m like omg Rhysie don’t get the flu🙄🤣😷
November 25, 2025 at 12:57 PM
The mom in me is so strong that seeing Rhys’ insta at all those places in Vegas I’m not like omg he’s so cute, I’m like omg Rhysie don’t get the flu🙄🤣😷
Reposted by aRealHumanBartender
November 25, 2025 at 4:48 AM
November 24, 2025 at 6:56 PM
I have an hour to write but my brain is couscous from heavy duty antibiotics etc. - are there November prompts circulating?
November 24, 2025 at 2:47 PM
I have an hour to write but my brain is couscous from heavy duty antibiotics etc. - are there November prompts circulating?
I think we should have a party. Idk how. But it’s been a YEAR and everyone still
standing should get to cheers-my-dears the night away with fellow lovers of fine things. I will make punch.
standing should get to cheers-my-dears the night away with fellow lovers of fine things. I will make punch.
November 24, 2025 at 1:01 PM
I think we should have a party. Idk how. But it’s been a YEAR and everyone still
standing should get to cheers-my-dears the night away with fellow lovers of fine things. I will make punch.
standing should get to cheers-my-dears the night away with fellow lovers of fine things. I will make punch.
What fictional creature traumatized you as a child?
fucking Madame
(I really really don’t like puppets)
fucking Madame
(I really really don’t like puppets)
November 23, 2025 at 11:20 PM
What fictional creature traumatized you as a child?
fucking Madame
(I really really don’t like puppets)
fucking Madame
(I really really don’t like puppets)
look at my pretty little grandmother and her beautiful sisters💓
(she is the baby, all the way to the left)
(she is the baby, all the way to the left)
November 23, 2025 at 2:14 PM
look at my pretty little grandmother and her beautiful sisters💓
(she is the baby, all the way to the left)
(she is the baby, all the way to the left)
