Spag 🙃
@yesmissmurphy.bsky.social
Staying delulu is the solulu 💡
My hairdresser has just announced he’s moving back to New Zealand and I’m devastated. It takes SO LONG to find a good hairdresser and he was the one. He knows all my secrets. We’ve been through so much. The history. I am bereft 💔
February 1, 2026 at 9:59 AM
My hairdresser has just announced he’s moving back to New Zealand and I’m devastated. It takes SO LONG to find a good hairdresser and he was the one. He knows all my secrets. We’ve been through so much. The history. I am bereft 💔
I was sold a working golden retriever but I got the intern
January 31, 2026 at 9:04 PM
I was sold a working golden retriever but I got the intern
Nobody knows what it means but it’s provocative
Daily Express: NOW YOU MUST GIVE BRITAIN A PROPER BREXIT #TomorrowsPapersToday
January 31, 2026 at 8:30 PM
Nobody knows what it means but it’s provocative
If this was my brother and I was the King I would order all my guards to kick him all the way down the driveway of Frogspawn Cottage, cut tit holes in all his clothes, and then force him on a plane.
PUSSYOOOOLES the lot of them
www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/cv...
PUSSYOOOOLES the lot of them
www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/cv...
Epstein files live updates: Starmer suggests Andrew should testify to US Congress, after new photos in Epstein files
More than three million documents have been released, including thousands of videos and images related to the late sex offender Jeffrey Epstein.
www.bbc.co.uk
January 31, 2026 at 8:28 PM
If this was my brother and I was the King I would order all my guards to kick him all the way down the driveway of Frogspawn Cottage, cut tit holes in all his clothes, and then force him on a plane.
PUSSYOOOOLES the lot of them
www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/cv...
PUSSYOOOOLES the lot of them
www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/cv...
There is a woman in the park who is a guide puppy trainer and I’ve now seen her with around 5 over the past 2 years.
All I’ll say is pray for the blind cos all these puppies except one have been entirely feral 🙏
All I’ll say is pray for the blind cos all these puppies except one have been entirely feral 🙏
January 31, 2026 at 7:43 PM
There is a woman in the park who is a guide puppy trainer and I’ve now seen her with around 5 over the past 2 years.
All I’ll say is pray for the blind cos all these puppies except one have been entirely feral 🙏
All I’ll say is pray for the blind cos all these puppies except one have been entirely feral 🙏
Reposted by Spag 🙃
Imagine being so annoying & off-putting that even a cartoonishly evil mega-paedo with an actual nonce island brushes you off to his handler with this
January 31, 2026 at 12:26 PM
Imagine being so annoying & off-putting that even a cartoonishly evil mega-paedo with an actual nonce island brushes you off to his handler with this
Reposted by Spag 🙃
Dear Jeff yes hello from my work email. Can’t wait to see u at Sexcriminalboat ,,
January 31, 2026 at 3:04 AM
Dear Jeff yes hello from my work email. Can’t wait to see u at Sexcriminalboat ,,
Reposted by Spag 🙃
Is it because they used Apple’s magic mouse charging port?
Tesla Just Killed the Most Important Car of the 21st Century — The Atlantic
The Model S deserved better than this.
apple.news
January 30, 2026 at 9:46 AM
Is it because they used Apple’s magic mouse charging port?
Reposted by Spag 🙃
The true difference between USA and UK
The headline: HE HAD TWO MAGAZINES WITH HIM
USA: armed and dangerous!
UK: ooh which ones?
The headline: HE HAD TWO MAGAZINES WITH HIM
USA: armed and dangerous!
UK: ooh which ones?
January 31, 2026 at 1:21 AM
The true difference between USA and UK
The headline: HE HAD TWO MAGAZINES WITH HIM
USA: armed and dangerous!
UK: ooh which ones?
The headline: HE HAD TWO MAGAZINES WITH HIM
USA: armed and dangerous!
UK: ooh which ones?
I had really thick cheese on toast for supper
Is it sitting? Yes
Is it digesting? Not even slightly
Would I do it again? One step ahead of you
Is it sitting? Yes
Is it digesting? Not even slightly
Would I do it again? One step ahead of you
January 31, 2026 at 1:27 AM
I had really thick cheese on toast for supper
Is it sitting? Yes
Is it digesting? Not even slightly
Would I do it again? One step ahead of you
Is it sitting? Yes
Is it digesting? Not even slightly
Would I do it again? One step ahead of you
The true difference between USA and UK
The headline: HE HAD TWO MAGAZINES WITH HIM
USA: armed and dangerous!
UK: ooh which ones?
The headline: HE HAD TWO MAGAZINES WITH HIM
USA: armed and dangerous!
UK: ooh which ones?
January 31, 2026 at 1:21 AM
The true difference between USA and UK
The headline: HE HAD TWO MAGAZINES WITH HIM
USA: armed and dangerous!
UK: ooh which ones?
The headline: HE HAD TWO MAGAZINES WITH HIM
USA: armed and dangerous!
UK: ooh which ones?
“Appearing in the Epstein files isn’t itself a sign of wrongdoing”
January 31, 2026 at 12:23 AM
“Appearing in the Epstein files isn’t itself a sign of wrongdoing”
Reposted by Spag 🙃
I consider owning a tesla to be a moral failing at this point
January 30, 2026 at 11:20 AM
I consider owning a tesla to be a moral failing at this point
Reposted by Spag 🙃
Who among us who have seen Schitt’s Creek don’t say ‘bebeh’ instead of ‘baby’? A masterful comic decision
January 30, 2026 at 6:44 PM
Who among us who have seen Schitt’s Creek don’t say ‘bebeh’ instead of ‘baby’? A masterful comic decision
Reposted by Spag 🙃
Macaulay Culkin pays tribute to his on-screen mother Catherine O’Hara:
“Mama. I thought we had time. I wanted more. I wanted to sit in a chair next to you. I heard you. But I had so much to say. I love you. I'll see you later.”
“Mama. I thought we had time. I wanted more. I wanted to sit in a chair next to you. I heard you. But I had so much to say. I love you. I'll see you later.”
January 30, 2026 at 7:26 PM
Macaulay Culkin pays tribute to his on-screen mother Catherine O’Hara:
“Mama. I thought we had time. I wanted more. I wanted to sit in a chair next to you. I heard you. But I had so much to say. I love you. I'll see you later.”
“Mama. I thought we had time. I wanted more. I wanted to sit in a chair next to you. I heard you. But I had so much to say. I love you. I'll see you later.”
I have done a lot of exercise this week and now I’m aching and have a headache
January 30, 2026 at 8:27 PM
I have done a lot of exercise this week and now I’m aching and have a headache
When you are setting up and building ads on Meta, it gives you the option of advantage+ creatives with all kinds of variables created by AI
You are *supposed* to check through them for quality assurance.
This company did not do that.
You are *supposed* to check through them for quality assurance.
This company did not do that.
January 30, 2026 at 8:10 PM
When you are setting up and building ads on Meta, it gives you the option of advantage+ creatives with all kinds of variables created by AI
You are *supposed* to check through them for quality assurance.
This company did not do that.
You are *supposed* to check through them for quality assurance.
This company did not do that.
An incredibly GOOD series is Steal on Amazon Prime. FUCKING HELL. I have not known a moment’s peace.
January 30, 2026 at 7:04 PM
An incredibly GOOD series is Steal on Amazon Prime. FUCKING HELL. I have not known a moment’s peace.
NOOOOOOOOO I am gutted 😭 news.sky.com/story/cather...
Catherine O'Hara, who starred in Home Alone and Schitt's Creek, has died
Actress Catherine O'Hara has died.
news.sky.com
January 30, 2026 at 6:35 PM
NOOOOOOOOO I am gutted 😭 news.sky.com/story/cather...
Sending this to Jeremy Vine
January 30, 2026 at 11:56 AM
Sending this to Jeremy Vine
Hey babe I got you a digital drawing of a Tiffany bracelet for Valentine’s Day 💖
January 30, 2026 at 10:15 AM
Hey babe I got you a digital drawing of a Tiffany bracelet for Valentine’s Day 💖
Do you think I would get a day off work if London goes underwater?
January 29, 2026 at 4:06 PM
Do you think I would get a day off work if London goes underwater?
I’m also a bit like… what’s the point? I can’t afford sandbags. Just let it be Venice. I have a paddleboard. I’ll use that to go to the office and do my PowerPoint presentations.
In other news: The UK is doing a big drill with South Korea in the doomsday glacier today (the glacier which would cause irreversible and deadly sea level rise if it melts) to see how fast it is melting (hint: it is fast) 💖
January 29, 2026 at 4:06 PM
I’m also a bit like… what’s the point? I can’t afford sandbags. Just let it be Venice. I have a paddleboard. I’ll use that to go to the office and do my PowerPoint presentations.