the wizard elwood
@thewizardelwood.bsky.social
he/him
home maker, sage, private detective, grand chancellor of antifa
I like ttrpgs, food culture, and deconstructing western culture norms with an eye towards smashing patriarchy and fascism
I have friends everywhere
home maker, sage, private detective, grand chancellor of antifa
I like ttrpgs, food culture, and deconstructing western culture norms with an eye towards smashing patriarchy and fascism
I have friends everywhere
Pinned
Can't spell RESIST without ERIS!
make it weird pls
make it weird pls
Reposted by the wizard elwood
What's from Chicago, hates Illinois Nazis, and is holy as fuck?
It's the Pope in 1982.
It's the Pope in 1982.
November 13, 2025 at 1:37 AM
What's from Chicago, hates Illinois Nazis, and is holy as fuck?
It's the Pope in 1982.
It's the Pope in 1982.
Reposted by the wizard elwood
it's not that i ever doubted that being a barista was a skilled position, but my year-long effort to try to produce a half-decent latte at home has convinced me that a good barista is easily more skilled than virtually every c-suite executive on the planet
November 11, 2025 at 3:58 PM
it's not that i ever doubted that being a barista was a skilled position, but my year-long effort to try to produce a half-decent latte at home has convinced me that a good barista is easily more skilled than virtually every c-suite executive on the planet
Reposted by the wizard elwood
Reposted by the wizard elwood
Remember that time Dick Cheney shot a guy in the face and then the guy had to go on TV and apologise for how being shot in the face made Dick Cheny look bad?
November 4, 2025 at 12:13 PM
Remember that time Dick Cheney shot a guy in the face and then the guy had to go on TV and apologise for how being shot in the face made Dick Cheny look bad?
Newsflash: Less Than 10% of New Yorkers are Pretty Racist.
Nearly a million New Yorkers ready to flee NYC if Mamdani becomes mayor — possibly igniting mass exodus: poll
Nearly a million New Yorkers ready to flee NYC if Mamdani becomes mayor — possibly igniting mass exodus: poll
Hundreds of thousands of New Yorkers are prepared to bolt from the Big Apple if socialist candidate Zohran Mamdani wins Tuesday's mayoral race — potentially setting the stage for the largest population flight in US history, a new poll warns.
nypost.com
November 3, 2025 at 1:30 PM
Newsflash: Less Than 10% of New Yorkers are Pretty Racist.
Reposted by the wizard elwood
How do we feel about double mustache. The hot new style? The peak of manhood?
November 2, 2025 at 8:53 PM
How do we feel about double mustache. The hot new style? The peak of manhood?
Remember that part at the beginning of A New Hope where they mention that Palpatine has dissolved the Senate?
October 31, 2025 at 2:44 PM
Remember that part at the beginning of A New Hope where they mention that Palpatine has dissolved the Senate?
Reposted by the wizard elwood
Happy Saturday everyone! I have a glass jewelry and cabochon store at nora.jewelry and I’d love to sell you something beautiful!
Here’s the holiday calendars: nora.jewelry/search?q=day...
#bsnm
Here’s the holiday calendars: nora.jewelry/search?q=day...
#bsnm
October 25, 2025 at 4:46 PM
Happy Saturday everyone! I have a glass jewelry and cabochon store at nora.jewelry and I’d love to sell you something beautiful!
Here’s the holiday calendars: nora.jewelry/search?q=day...
#bsnm
Here’s the holiday calendars: nora.jewelry/search?q=day...
#bsnm
Biannual reposting of my most important contribution to society
October 15, 2025 at 2:43 PM
Biannual reposting of my most important contribution to society
Normalize stating exactly who/what you are talking about in your opening text, for fucks' sake
October 15, 2025 at 2:28 PM
Normalize stating exactly who/what you are talking about in your opening text, for fucks' sake
Nigiri,
Conan the Barbarian,
Everything in its Right Place
Conan the Barbarian,
Everything in its Right Place
Introduce yourself with:
A food you will always eat;
A film you'll always want to see; and a song you will always stop to listen to.
A food you will always eat;
A film you'll always want to see; and a song you will always stop to listen to.
October 13, 2025 at 12:09 PM
Nigiri,
Conan the Barbarian,
Everything in its Right Place
Conan the Barbarian,
Everything in its Right Place
Reposted by the wizard elwood
Reposted by the wizard elwood
Ahem.
Bluesky: what’s the greatest example of someone naming something (animal, landmark, whatever) after a famous person not just because the person is famous but also because the thing is clearly somehow representative of the person?
Nick Saban now has an ancient crab named after him.
October 3, 2025 at 3:51 PM
Ahem.
Reposted by the wizard elwood
"I thought you were the party of peace" is their way of saying "you're supposed to take our abuse without fighting back"
October 2, 2025 at 11:28 AM
"I thought you were the party of peace" is their way of saying "you're supposed to take our abuse without fighting back"
Reposted by the wizard elwood
"Dems will get blamed for a shutdown" as opposed to what, all the friendly coverage and positive credit they'd get for caving yet again? This whole premise is built on a delusion about what the alternative is. There's no cowering in the corner and being so inoffensive they won't still attack you.
September 30, 2025 at 1:56 AM
"Dems will get blamed for a shutdown" as opposed to what, all the friendly coverage and positive credit they'd get for caving yet again? This whole premise is built on a delusion about what the alternative is. There's no cowering in the corner and being so inoffensive they won't still attack you.
The science is actually very clear. Tylenol is not the cause of autism.
The science on Tylenol and autism isn't clear, despite President Trump's claims. Here's what parents need to know to make their own decisions about acetaminophen.
When it comes to Tylenol, what are parents to do?
The science on Tylenol and autism isn't clear, despite President Trump's claims. Here's what parents need to know to make their own decisions about acetaminophen.
n.pr
September 24, 2025 at 12:56 PM
The science is actually very clear. Tylenol is not the cause of autism.
Reposted by the wizard elwood
me telling my grandkids what it was like to have vaccines
September 22, 2025 at 8:55 PM
me telling my grandkids what it was like to have vaccines
Reposted by the wizard elwood
1/
I rise from the grave not to mourn but to laugh, to jab the ribs of tyrants even when they’ve gone stiff and cold. This is not cruelty—it’s hygiene. Call me The Ghost of Mark Twain, and consider this thread a disinfectant for sanctimony.
I rise from the grave not to mourn but to laugh, to jab the ribs of tyrants even when they’ve gone stiff and cold. This is not cruelty—it’s hygiene. Call me The Ghost of Mark Twain, and consider this thread a disinfectant for sanctimony.
September 19, 2025 at 2:41 PM
1/
I rise from the grave not to mourn but to laugh, to jab the ribs of tyrants even when they’ve gone stiff and cold. This is not cruelty—it’s hygiene. Call me The Ghost of Mark Twain, and consider this thread a disinfectant for sanctimony.
I rise from the grave not to mourn but to laugh, to jab the ribs of tyrants even when they’ve gone stiff and cold. This is not cruelty—it’s hygiene. Call me The Ghost of Mark Twain, and consider this thread a disinfectant for sanctimony.
Reposted by the wizard elwood
BE SO BRILLIANT NONE OF YOUR ENEMIES WOULD DARE LOOK AT YOU.
September 16, 2025 at 11:20 AM
BE SO BRILLIANT NONE OF YOUR ENEMIES WOULD DARE LOOK AT YOU.
Reposted by the wizard elwood
EMPATHY - He was confused when he died. Confused and alone, most likely. Overcome with the awful surprise of it all.
September 12, 2025 at 10:19 AM
EMPATHY - He was confused when he died. Confused and alone, most likely. Overcome with the awful surprise of it all.
Is this how we find out magic is real
September 10, 2025 at 8:59 PM
Is this how we find out magic is real
Reposted by the wizard elwood
I heard they’re still struggling to get the president to master the line “putting on the ritz!”
September 2, 2025 at 6:37 PM
I heard they’re still struggling to get the president to master the line “putting on the ritz!”
Who else is curious to hear the other 3/4 of the Giuliani crash story?
My bet is "chased/crashed by pimp".
My bet is "chased/crashed by pimp".
September 1, 2025 at 10:02 PM
Who else is curious to hear the other 3/4 of the Giuliani crash story?
My bet is "chased/crashed by pimp".
My bet is "chased/crashed by pimp".
Reposted by the wizard elwood
You see, it's not the absence of the lowest common denominator that oppresses them, it's the existence of anything else
August 31, 2025 at 9:28 AM
You see, it's not the absence of the lowest common denominator that oppresses them, it's the existence of anything else