Patrick Damp
@synonymforwet.bsky.social
Writer in Pittsburgh. Co-host of Locked On Penguins. Purveyor of nonsense who speaks only for himself. I yell about sports and WWE too much.
Pinned
Online comedians with the most followers are the most nihilistic people I’ve ever heard in my life
They sound like walking SI symptoms, and people love it — because they understand a similar misery
They sound like walking SI symptoms, and people love it — because they understand a similar misery
Genuinely don’t like the fact that one of the most sure fire ways to go viral or get validation in this modern era is to be cynical.
You give up the game before it even starts, you lose.
You don’t have to irrationally optimistic but “lol nothing matters” isn’t better.
You give up the game before it even starts, you lose.
You don’t have to irrationally optimistic but “lol nothing matters” isn’t better.
Reposted by Patrick Damp
but enough about brock purdy
everyone on the tv wants you to know that this is good actually
January 4, 2026 at 1:41 AM
but enough about brock purdy
Fine, I’ll say it, these 49ers uniforms are CRISP
January 4, 2026 at 1:13 AM
Fine, I’ll say it, these 49ers uniforms are CRISP
Reposted by Patrick Damp
Does that mean that Kuhn's would be Gabe's?
January 3, 2026 at 9:43 PM
Does that mean that Kuhn's would be Gabe's?
Shawn understands.
Would that make Foodland the Hills of Pittsburgh grocery stores?
January 3, 2026 at 9:31 PM
Shawn understands.
Shop ‘n Save is functionally the K-Mart of Pittsburgh grocery stores.
I will not explain further.
I will not explain further.
January 3, 2026 at 9:26 PM
Shop ‘n Save is functionally the K-Mart of Pittsburgh grocery stores.
I will not explain further.
I will not explain further.
Reposted by Patrick Damp
today has been a functional existence proof of this statement
I swear Trump could start a war unilaterally and Bluesky would be more angry about what Hakeem Jefferies and Chuck Schumer have to say about it than the actual war itself.
January 3, 2026 at 8:28 PM
today has been a functional existence proof of this statement
Second time I can use this today re: this website and democrats!
January 3, 2026 at 8:44 PM
Second time I can use this today re: this website and democrats!
Reposted by Patrick Damp
If the Democrats don't do something they would need the political power I refused to help them get to do, I will make sure they never get the political power they need to do the things I demand they do. I am very smart.
January 3, 2026 at 6:42 PM
If the Democrats don't do something they would need the political power I refused to help them get to do, I will make sure they never get the political power they need to do the things I demand they do. I am very smart.
Reposted by Patrick Damp
But they’re conditioned to do it and it doesn’t matter. Don’t make this what you are focusing on. This is what folks always do Republicans do terrible shit and Dems don’t respond perfectly
WHICH IS TEN TIMES WORSE
WHICH IS TEN TIMES WORSE
you simply do not have to preface your statements about this with “but Maduro sucks”
whether or not Maduro sucks is entirely beside the point - we invaded another country and grabbed their leader with no justification other than “we wanted to”
don’t give them cover on it
whether or not Maduro sucks is entirely beside the point - we invaded another country and grabbed their leader with no justification other than “we wanted to”
don’t give them cover on it
January 3, 2026 at 8:32 PM
But they’re conditioned to do it and it doesn’t matter. Don’t make this what you are focusing on. This is what folks always do Republicans do terrible shit and Dems don’t respond perfectly
WHICH IS TEN TIMES WORSE
WHICH IS TEN TIMES WORSE
Scrubs has a new season next month, America’s about to launch into an illegal war for oil, Sidney Crosby’s on pace for ~100 points, I’m seeing Yellowcard on tour this summer.
2005, welcome back. Can you resurrect my dad, next?
2005, welcome back. Can you resurrect my dad, next?
January 3, 2026 at 8:32 PM
Scrubs has a new season next month, America’s about to launch into an illegal war for oil, Sidney Crosby’s on pace for ~100 points, I’m seeing Yellowcard on tour this summer.
2005, welcome back. Can you resurrect my dad, next?
2005, welcome back. Can you resurrect my dad, next?
Wrote about USA Hockey learning all the wrong lessons from maybe the most innovative team in its history.
Check it out: patrickdamp.substack.com/p/the-mythol...
Check it out: patrickdamp.substack.com/p/the-mythol...
January 3, 2026 at 7:20 PM
Wrote about USA Hockey learning all the wrong lessons from maybe the most innovative team in its history.
Check it out: patrickdamp.substack.com/p/the-mythol...
Check it out: patrickdamp.substack.com/p/the-mythol...
Reposted by Patrick Damp
scary moment for our priors this morning but I think we got through it
January 3, 2026 at 7:02 PM
scary moment for our priors this morning but I think we got through it
Reposted by Patrick Damp
Basically the Dem statements I’ve seen are trying to head off the “so you think Maduro is good?” lines of attack that will come from the right and be amplified by the press.
And these are being used by folks that hate Dems more than Republicans to attack Dems as usual.
And these are being used by folks that hate Dems more than Republicans to attack Dems as usual.
January 3, 2026 at 6:29 PM
Basically the Dem statements I’ve seen are trying to head off the “so you think Maduro is good?” lines of attack that will come from the right and be amplified by the press.
And these are being used by folks that hate Dems more than Republicans to attack Dems as usual.
And these are being used by folks that hate Dems more than Republicans to attack Dems as usual.
Reposted by Patrick Damp
Republicans killed 2 different pieces of legislation in the House less than 2 weeks ago to reign in this bs w/ Venezuela. People being adamant about needing to be ignorant isn’t on the party in the minority when Republicans they enable found time for this while letting healthcare premiums skyrocket.
Members of Congress: stop posting online and APPEAR, PHYSICALLY on the steps of the Capitol to decry this unconstitutional violation of domestic & international law. SHOW THE PEOPLE the level of danger we are facing as a country.
@housedemocrats.bsky.social
@senatedemocrats.bsky.social
@housedemocrats.bsky.social
@senatedemocrats.bsky.social
January 3, 2026 at 6:20 PM
Republicans killed 2 different pieces of legislation in the House less than 2 weeks ago to reign in this bs w/ Venezuela. People being adamant about needing to be ignorant isn’t on the party in the minority when Republicans they enable found time for this while letting healthcare premiums skyrocket.
Reposted by Patrick Damp
a lot going on right now, but it's worth noting that Kara Swisher is having to keep tap-dancing closer and closer to the truth about her central role in enabling the rise of the technology brothers, specifically elon musk
January 3, 2026 at 6:12 PM
a lot going on right now, but it's worth noting that Kara Swisher is having to keep tap-dancing closer and closer to the truth about her central role in enabling the rise of the technology brothers, specifically elon musk
Reposted by Patrick Damp
Is see we're doing posting as politics again.
January 3, 2026 at 5:38 PM
Is see we're doing posting as politics again.
Reposted by Patrick Damp
To summarize:
1.) Kidnap Maduro
2.) Declare we're occupying the country and taking the oil.
3.) ??????? Where are the troops? The oil is too expensive??
4.) ??????
5.) GREAT FASCIST VICTORY FOR GENERALIISSAMO TRUMP
1.) Kidnap Maduro
2.) Declare we're occupying the country and taking the oil.
3.) ??????? Where are the troops? The oil is too expensive??
4.) ??????
5.) GREAT FASCIST VICTORY FOR GENERALIISSAMO TRUMP
January 3, 2026 at 5:50 PM
To summarize:
1.) Kidnap Maduro
2.) Declare we're occupying the country and taking the oil.
3.) ??????? Where are the troops? The oil is too expensive??
4.) ??????
5.) GREAT FASCIST VICTORY FOR GENERALIISSAMO TRUMP
1.) Kidnap Maduro
2.) Declare we're occupying the country and taking the oil.
3.) ??????? Where are the troops? The oil is too expensive??
4.) ??????
5.) GREAT FASCIST VICTORY FOR GENERALIISSAMO TRUMP
Pittsburgh Penguins, imo
January 3, 2026 at 4:56 PM
Pittsburgh Penguins, imo
Reposted by Patrick Damp
I've noticed this a lot too and its crazy how much these sorts of ppl act like 9/11 occurred in some vacuum vis a vis initial public opinion on Iraq/Afghanistan and that 2002 might not actually be the normative way most avg voters view the prospect of long term US military intervention somewhere
One thing every new FP crisis makes very clear is that millennials and zoomers have adopted some very weird theories of how foreign policy intersects with public opinion as a result of the Iraq War and stories about it thereafter
January 3, 2026 at 3:17 PM
I've noticed this a lot too and its crazy how much these sorts of ppl act like 9/11 occurred in some vacuum vis a vis initial public opinion on Iraq/Afghanistan and that 2002 might not actually be the normative way most avg voters view the prospect of long term US military intervention somewhere
I dunno man, this feels like a column written for and inspired by comment sections and social media and not real life.
They cheered Renegade two weeks later. Sell the team chants have been happening for a while.
Pens attendance is a shade under 90%.
City needs better sports media.
They cheered Renegade two weeks later. Sell the team chants have been happening for a while.
Pens attendance is a shade under 90%.
City needs better sports media.
January 3, 2026 at 3:00 PM
I dunno man, this feels like a column written for and inspired by comment sections and social media and not real life.
They cheered Renegade two weeks later. Sell the team chants have been happening for a while.
Pens attendance is a shade under 90%.
City needs better sports media.
They cheered Renegade two weeks later. Sell the team chants have been happening for a while.
Pens attendance is a shade under 90%.
City needs better sports media.
Lotta people on this here website are really ascribing some all-knowing, super secret master planning to this administration when they have shown us over and over their SOP is “ready, fire, aim.”
You know, it’s plausible that this was done without a plan for what comes after because the only real goal was to get video of US troops looking cool arresting Marudo so it can be posted Online. It seems to be the only thing that matters to this administration.
January 3, 2026 at 2:42 PM
Lotta people on this here website are really ascribing some all-knowing, super secret master planning to this administration when they have shown us over and over their SOP is “ready, fire, aim.”
Reposted by Patrick Damp
The Ukrainian air defenses, same thing that was stopping them before
January 3, 2026 at 2:28 PM
The Ukrainian air defenses, same thing that was stopping them before
Reposted by Patrick Damp
Trump will not even have the full support of his own party in congress on this—and theres a high chance congress wasnt even properly informed before it happened—let alone the support of much of the country. Its an obvious bad decision thatll go badly but doomers on this site cant help themselves.
If you’re going to do God Damn America posting about this, it seems like America agrees with you so maybe hold off on that
January 3, 2026 at 2:07 PM
Trump will not even have the full support of his own party in congress on this—and theres a high chance congress wasnt even properly informed before it happened—let alone the support of much of the country. Its an obvious bad decision thatll go badly but doomers on this site cant help themselves.
Reposted by Patrick Damp
Its not like a Republican administration doing a flashy lightning strike against a large country w a huge population that the president & his top advisors have a grudge against without a plan for how to keep a lid on the place afterwards has ever come back to bite them. I'm sure this will be fine.
January 3, 2026 at 1:52 PM
Its not like a Republican administration doing a flashy lightning strike against a large country w a huge population that the president & his top advisors have a grudge against without a plan for how to keep a lid on the place afterwards has ever come back to bite them. I'm sure this will be fine.