Rick Aaron
@rickaaron.bsky.social
Artist lover, reader, avid dog
Reposted by Rick Aaron
All hammered up on wassail
December 26, 2025 at 3:16 AM
All hammered up on wassail
These 237 Amazon boxes and I will be having a breakdown soon.
December 25, 2025 at 9:06 PM
These 237 Amazon boxes and I will be having a breakdown soon.
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“Can you tell us what you do?”
“Mostly just loaf around.”
“Wow, that was terrible.”
“Well, it killed at our Christmas party.”
“Mostly just loaf around.”
“Wow, that was terrible.”
“Well, it killed at our Christmas party.”
December 25, 2025 at 4:55 PM
“Can you tell us what you do?”
“Mostly just loaf around.”
“Wow, that was terrible.”
“Well, it killed at our Christmas party.”
“Mostly just loaf around.”
“Wow, that was terrible.”
“Well, it killed at our Christmas party.”
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Hostage Negotiator: What do we have, cap?
Police Captain: It's another figgy pudding situation.
Hostage Negotiator: Again!?
Police Captain: It's another figgy pudding situation.
Hostage Negotiator: Again!?
December 25, 2024 at 3:58 PM
Hostage Negotiator: What do we have, cap?
Police Captain: It's another figgy pudding situation.
Hostage Negotiator: Again!?
Police Captain: It's another figgy pudding situation.
Hostage Negotiator: Again!?
Reposted by Rick Aaron
Me: [gets a hippopotamus for Christmas]
My cat (staring at his litter box): wtaf
My cat (staring at his litter box): wtaf
December 25, 2025 at 5:06 PM
Me: [gets a hippopotamus for Christmas]
My cat (staring at his litter box): wtaf
My cat (staring at his litter box): wtaf
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idk, i think it’s eggnog
December 25, 2025 at 2:04 PM
idk, i think it’s eggnog
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Imagine having a super tough shift down at Nakatomi Plaza then having to go home to chase Urkel off your daughter
December 24, 2025 at 10:14 PM
Imagine having a super tough shift down at Nakatomi Plaza then having to go home to chase Urkel off your daughter
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Grandpa: I was at Normandy.
Dad: I was at the Battle of Khe Sanh.
Me: I once went to Kohl’s on Christmas Eve.
Everyone: *gasps*
Dad: I was at the Battle of Khe Sanh.
Me: I once went to Kohl’s on Christmas Eve.
Everyone: *gasps*
December 24, 2025 at 6:48 PM
Grandpa: I was at Normandy.
Dad: I was at the Battle of Khe Sanh.
Me: I once went to Kohl’s on Christmas Eve.
Everyone: *gasps*
Dad: I was at the Battle of Khe Sanh.
Me: I once went to Kohl’s on Christmas Eve.
Everyone: *gasps*
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Another Brick in the Wall is my least favourite song about my driving
December 24, 2025 at 6:06 PM
Another Brick in the Wall is my least favourite song about my driving
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Lonely are the brave, I say to Alexa as I recall the time I told my girlfriend I wasn’t taking her to see Grease.
December 24, 2025 at 5:46 PM
Lonely are the brave, I say to Alexa as I recall the time I told my girlfriend I wasn’t taking her to see Grease.
When Pete Hegseth suspects there’s fentanyl on the sleigh
December 24, 2025 at 4:23 PM
When Pete Hegseth suspects there’s fentanyl on the sleigh
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- Housebroken
- Great with kids and adults
- Thrice-divorced
- Masters in English Literature
- Marxist
- Loves to cuddle
- Great with kids and adults
- Thrice-divorced
- Masters in English Literature
- Marxist
- Loves to cuddle
December 24, 2025 at 2:45 PM
- Housebroken
- Great with kids and adults
- Thrice-divorced
- Masters in English Literature
- Marxist
- Loves to cuddle
- Great with kids and adults
- Thrice-divorced
- Masters in English Literature
- Marxist
- Loves to cuddle
Reposted by Rick Aaron
People out here griping about their 40s and they haven't even reached the Age of Polyps & Ointments
December 24, 2025 at 5:22 AM
People out here griping about their 40s and they haven't even reached the Age of Polyps & Ointments
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Dec. 1: I should start shopping now so I’ll have the perfect Christmas presents for the family get-together.
Dec. 15: I’d better get on that gift shopping soon.
Dec. 23: I think there’s a Love’s Travel Stop on the way.
Dec. 15: I’d better get on that gift shopping soon.
Dec. 23: I think there’s a Love’s Travel Stop on the way.
December 24, 2025 at 12:09 AM
Dec. 1: I should start shopping now so I’ll have the perfect Christmas presents for the family get-together.
Dec. 15: I’d better get on that gift shopping soon.
Dec. 23: I think there’s a Love’s Travel Stop on the way.
Dec. 15: I’d better get on that gift shopping soon.
Dec. 23: I think there’s a Love’s Travel Stop on the way.
Reposted by Rick Aaron
[blind date]
Her, texting: I’m at the bar. Where r u?
Him: I’m at a table, in a suit.
Her: Nice. Wait, I can’t see you
Him: *𝘪𝘯 𝘨𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺*
Her, texting: I’m at the bar. Where r u?
Him: I’m at a table, in a suit.
Her: Nice. Wait, I can’t see you
Him: *𝘪𝘯 𝘨𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺*
December 23, 2025 at 8:21 PM
[blind date]
Her, texting: I’m at the bar. Where r u?
Him: I’m at a table, in a suit.
Her: Nice. Wait, I can’t see you
Him: *𝘪𝘯 𝘨𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺*
Her, texting: I’m at the bar. Where r u?
Him: I’m at a table, in a suit.
Her: Nice. Wait, I can’t see you
Him: *𝘪𝘯 𝘨𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺*
Reposted by Rick Aaron
When Canadian Girl Scouts come to sell you cookies, you goddamn buy cookies.
December 23, 2025 at 7:17 PM
When Canadian Girl Scouts come to sell you cookies, you goddamn buy cookies.
Reposted by Rick Aaron
don’t wrap presents on the floor without a plan on how to get back up
December 23, 2025 at 8:29 PM
don’t wrap presents on the floor without a plan on how to get back up
Reposted by Rick Aaron
I'm living the dream. Unfortunately, it's the dream where I forget to wear pants to work.
December 22, 2025 at 11:14 PM
I'm living the dream. Unfortunately, it's the dream where I forget to wear pants to work.
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Her: Your profile said you were a special kind of dom.
Me: Boredom.
Me: Boredom.
December 22, 2025 at 3:52 PM
Her: Your profile said you were a special kind of dom.
Me: Boredom.
Me: Boredom.
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sometimes i’ll suggest to my wife that we stay up past eleven and watch one more episode because i want her to know there’s still a little of the bad boy in me
December 22, 2025 at 9:14 PM
sometimes i’ll suggest to my wife that we stay up past eleven and watch one more episode because i want her to know there’s still a little of the bad boy in me
Reposted by Rick Aaron
Wear a fanny pack with your cargo pants to be prepared for any eventuality except the sex.
December 22, 2025 at 6:01 PM
Wear a fanny pack with your cargo pants to be prepared for any eventuality except the sex.
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if social media has taught me anything... i’m unaware of it
December 22, 2025 at 4:15 PM
if social media has taught me anything... i’m unaware of it
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Went to a party last night and there were 5 dogs there and I have an idea for a new law that will actually be good
December 22, 2025 at 2:52 PM
Went to a party last night and there were 5 dogs there and I have an idea for a new law that will actually be good
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me, the moment it says “out for delivery”
December 22, 2025 at 1:32 PM
me, the moment it says “out for delivery”
Reposted by Rick Aaron
Hard work may not kill me but it's not a risk I'm prepared to take.
December 22, 2025 at 2:10 PM
Hard work may not kill me but it's not a risk I'm prepared to take.