Randy Tayler
@randytayler.com
Former orphan
https://exfish.us/1
https://exfish.us/1
Doing some self-psychoanalyzing. When people say they don't care what other people think of them... that's bullcrap, right? I mean, good goal and all, but people don't REALLY feel that way, do they?
December 29, 2025 at 9:10 PM
Doing some self-psychoanalyzing. When people say they don't care what other people think of them... that's bullcrap, right? I mean, good goal and all, but people don't REALLY feel that way, do they?
Reposted by Randy Tayler
They say imitation crab is the sincerest form of crab
December 27, 2025 at 1:56 PM
They say imitation crab is the sincerest form of crab
Reposted by Randy Tayler
Sun-Maid Announces Girl In Logo Has Always Been Sentient Raisin Disguising Self In Human Flesh https://theonion.com/sun-maid-announces-girl-in-logo-has-always-been-sentient-raisin-disguising-self-in-human-flesh/
December 28, 2025 at 8:30 PM
Sun-Maid Announces Girl In Logo Has Always Been Sentient Raisin Disguising Self In Human Flesh https://theonion.com/sun-maid-announces-girl-in-logo-has-always-been-sentient-raisin-disguising-self-in-human-flesh/
My 19yo daughter is using Comic Sans for her Sonic the Hedgehog fan fiction, and I don't know how to stop her. I can't ground her - she's an adult!
I just feel like I've failed as a parent.
I just feel like I've failed as a parent.
December 28, 2025 at 8:21 PM
My 19yo daughter is using Comic Sans for her Sonic the Hedgehog fan fiction, and I don't know how to stop her. I can't ground her - she's an adult!
I just feel like I've failed as a parent.
I just feel like I've failed as a parent.
Reposted by Randy Tayler
I used to get really angry anytime I played sports. It was inevitable - I'd screw up (I'm TERRIBLE at sports, yes all of them) and get frothingly mad.
So I stopped playing sports.
But the tendency is still there, I saw today. Playing video games can enrage me.
I hate myself for it. What is that?
So I stopped playing sports.
But the tendency is still there, I saw today. Playing video games can enrage me.
I hate myself for it. What is that?
December 28, 2025 at 2:59 AM
I used to get really angry anytime I played sports. It was inevitable - I'd screw up (I'm TERRIBLE at sports, yes all of them) and get frothingly mad.
So I stopped playing sports.
But the tendency is still there, I saw today. Playing video games can enrage me.
I hate myself for it. What is that?
So I stopped playing sports.
But the tendency is still there, I saw today. Playing video games can enrage me.
I hate myself for it. What is that?
What if instead of copying all my old files to my new computer every time I upgrade, like I've done for the last THIRTY YEARS, I just... started fresh? No documents, videos, abandoned projects. Is that a thing?
December 27, 2025 at 8:53 PM
What if instead of copying all my old files to my new computer every time I upgrade, like I've done for the last THIRTY YEARS, I just... started fresh? No documents, videos, abandoned projects. Is that a thing?
HER: I cut and sold my hair so I could afford a chain for your pocket watch
ME: Oh no! I sold my pocket watch to buy you a scrunchy
HER: Uh, scrunchies aren't that expensive
ME: I also went to the track
ME: Oh no! I sold my pocket watch to buy you a scrunchy
HER: Uh, scrunchies aren't that expensive
ME: I also went to the track
December 27, 2025 at 8:12 PM
HER: I cut and sold my hair so I could afford a chain for your pocket watch
ME: Oh no! I sold my pocket watch to buy you a scrunchy
HER: Uh, scrunchies aren't that expensive
ME: I also went to the track
ME: Oh no! I sold my pocket watch to buy you a scrunchy
HER: Uh, scrunchies aren't that expensive
ME: I also went to the track
This audiobook needs subtitles
December 27, 2025 at 7:50 PM
This audiobook needs subtitles
Are there any quotable lines from any of the AVATAR movies? I'm fairly confident there are not - I know more lines from KINDERGARTEN COP, and I saw that just once, thirty-five years ago.
December 27, 2025 at 3:18 AM
Are there any quotable lines from any of the AVATAR movies? I'm fairly confident there are not - I know more lines from KINDERGARTEN COP, and I saw that just once, thirty-five years ago.
"What's today, my fine fellow?" said Scrooge.
"Today?" replied the boy. "Why, it's BOXING DAY!"
"Oh. Huh. Well, shit."
"Today?" replied the boy. "Why, it's BOXING DAY!"
"Oh. Huh. Well, shit."
December 27, 2025 at 2:25 AM
"What's today, my fine fellow?" said Scrooge.
"Today?" replied the boy. "Why, it's BOXING DAY!"
"Oh. Huh. Well, shit."
"Today?" replied the boy. "Why, it's BOXING DAY!"
"Oh. Huh. Well, shit."
The lost epilogue to A CHRISTMAS CAROL had the three Christmas spirits unveil themselves, revealing that they're actually devils, and the whole thing with Scrooge was all about saving the life of Tiny Tim, for he was the Devil's spawn, the antichrist, come to reign when he came of age. Dark!
December 24, 2025 at 5:53 PM
The lost epilogue to A CHRISTMAS CAROL had the three Christmas spirits unveil themselves, revealing that they're actually devils, and the whole thing with Scrooge was all about saving the life of Tiny Tim, for he was the Devil's spawn, the antichrist, come to reign when he came of age. Dark!
The number of strangers involved with my leaky basement problem is now above twenty.
The leak specialist is now wearing headphones and listening for the leak outside with his special magic tool. Reminds me of a beachcomber with a metal detector, only he's looking for the source of all watery evil.
The leak specialist is now wearing headphones and listening for the leak outside with his special magic tool. Reminds me of a beachcomber with a metal detector, only he's looking for the source of all watery evil.
December 23, 2025 at 9:15 PM
The number of strangers involved with my leaky basement problem is now above twenty.
The leak specialist is now wearing headphones and listening for the leak outside with his special magic tool. Reminds me of a beachcomber with a metal detector, only he's looking for the source of all watery evil.
The leak specialist is now wearing headphones and listening for the leak outside with his special magic tool. Reminds me of a beachcomber with a metal detector, only he's looking for the source of all watery evil.
How do you say "Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra" in French, I wonder sometimes when I'm on Ambien
December 23, 2025 at 5:32 PM
How do you say "Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra" in French, I wonder sometimes when I'm on Ambien
Reposted by Randy Tayler
The full spiked 60 Minutes CECOT package, clean & subtitled. 1/5
December 23, 2025 at 1:28 AM
The full spiked 60 Minutes CECOT package, clean & subtitled. 1/5
Reposted by Randy Tayler
why did they redact this
December 20, 2025 at 8:19 PM
why did they redact this
Reposted by Randy Tayler
The Epstein file is the only thing Trump has ever taken his name off of
🚨 "The Justice Department redacted the names and identifiers of victims. Fox News Digital has learned that the same redaction standards were applied to politically exposed individuals and government officials. "
h/t @kleinmatic.bsky.social
h/t @kleinmatic.bsky.social
Epstein files explode open as DOJ details discovery of powerful figures and more than 1,200 victims
EXCLUSIVE: More than a dozen people and government officials' names appear in the hundreds of thousands of pages of Jeffrey Epstein files made public Friday, sources said.
www.foxnews.com
December 19, 2025 at 11:20 PM
The Epstein file is the only thing Trump has ever taken his name off of
The framing for this photo of the sign change at the Kennedy Center is *chef's kiss*
Memorial, huh? That's a glimmer of hope right there.
Memorial, huh? That's a glimmer of hope right there.
December 20, 2025 at 12:47 AM
The framing for this photo of the sign change at the Kennedy Center is *chef's kiss*
Memorial, huh? That's a glimmer of hope right there.
Memorial, huh? That's a glimmer of hope right there.
Reposted by Randy Tayler
MARY: i’m exhausted
JOSEPH: he’s finally asleep
LITTLE DRUMMER BOY: hold my myrrh
JOSEPH: he’s finally asleep
LITTLE DRUMMER BOY: hold my myrrh
December 19, 2025 at 4:35 PM
MARY: i’m exhausted
JOSEPH: he’s finally asleep
LITTLE DRUMMER BOY: hold my myrrh
JOSEPH: he’s finally asleep
LITTLE DRUMMER BOY: hold my myrrh
Carols that make demands (like "bring us some figgy pudding, we won't leave until we get some") should be called Karens.
December 19, 2025 at 2:09 PM
Carols that make demands (like "bring us some figgy pudding, we won't leave until we get some") should be called Karens.
The mailman for my complex always stops before he gets to our collection of boxes, then stares at his phone for five minutes before driving the remaining fifty feet and distributing the mail to the boxes.
I feel ya, brother.
I feel ya, brother.
December 18, 2025 at 9:07 PM
The mailman for my complex always stops before he gets to our collection of boxes, then stares at his phone for five minutes before driving the remaining fifty feet and distributing the mail to the boxes.
I feel ya, brother.
I feel ya, brother.
Reposted by Randy Tayler
I fell off the diet wagon while at the grocery store. I then proceeded to throw rocks at the wagon's wheels until I broke enough spokes that it collapsed. I then set fire to it.
I'm stress eating to deal with my flooded basement. Fringe benefit: fat floats.
I'm stress eating to deal with my flooded basement. Fringe benefit: fat floats.
December 17, 2025 at 11:22 PM
I fell off the diet wagon while at the grocery store. I then proceeded to throw rocks at the wagon's wheels until I broke enough spokes that it collapsed. I then set fire to it.
I'm stress eating to deal with my flooded basement. Fringe benefit: fat floats.
I'm stress eating to deal with my flooded basement. Fringe benefit: fat floats.
Elf on a Shelf has been around long enough now that we have adults who were kids at its inception.
What do you think of it now, looking back? Was it creepy or fun?
What do you think of it now, looking back? Was it creepy or fun?
December 16, 2025 at 3:10 PM
Elf on a Shelf has been around long enough now that we have adults who were kids at its inception.
What do you think of it now, looking back? Was it creepy or fun?
What do you think of it now, looking back? Was it creepy or fun?
Reposted by Randy Tayler
Cackling Referee Declares Penalty For Pass Interference Shall Be 10,000 Years Of Winter https://theonion.com/cackling-referee-declares-penalty-for-pass-interference-shall-be-10000-years-of-winter/
December 16, 2025 at 1:40 AM
Cackling Referee Declares Penalty For Pass Interference Shall Be 10,000 Years Of Winter https://theonion.com/cackling-referee-declares-penalty-for-pass-interference-shall-be-10000-years-of-winter/