How much longer before the Congressional Amendment requiring all citizens to go see Melania?

When anyone from SCTV dies it’s like 30 people have died. Every character they created was as alive as anyone else you’ve ever met.

Black coffee and a bowl of cereal is a good sanity reset

CBS paid the president of the United States millions in bribe money and now they censor news reports so it does not annoy him. I don’t know how much plainer we can put this.

I'm old enough to remember when they started playing commercials before trailers in theaters. People older than me were offended by it, I didn't think it was a big deal, but I should have listened. We should have held the line. I should have listened.

It REALLY doesn't help that both of these teams have the same f*****g color scheme.

#WorldSeries #Dodgers

Most of the "MAHA" movement is just insane religious extremism.

This aspect of it isn't blue enough racketmn.com/what-i-saw-a...

But what about MAGA on MAGA crime? Nobody's talking about the REAL problems in America and someone needs to.

"Common Sense: Hasty Musings on Tyranny & Democracy Held In The Brief Window Between Consumption of Carne Asada Bowl with All the Fixings (Including Guac) and Expelling The Shame And Regret in The Lavoratory (After the Cashier Gives You the Bathroom Code, Of Course)"

By Thomas Paine

I wish myself the same miracle recovery that Gavin Newsom has experienced from ole-white-male-patterned late-onset podcast syndrome.

Been in L.A. for two years and I still miss New York, but I will admit that when someone in L.A. says they had a magical experience it’s like locking eyes with a coyote under a full moon and when someone in New York says it they mean they witnessed a guy dressed as Ant-Man get kicked by a cop horse.

If John Mayer was singing about your body, what word would he use to describe it?

Caught this funny and moving one-man show at Skylight Theatre in Los Feliz last night. Congratulations to author/performer Mason McCulley and director Cameron Watson.

#LATheatre #SkylightTheatre #LosFeliz

When they start rounding up the artists for the firing squads, I can only help I'm relevant enough to be considered.

Knock Knock

There's always so much pressure to open with a quippy, tone-setting inaugural post. So I'm gonna save the juice for my second one.