jordan, but spooky 👻🦇🎃
@jbythekilowatt.bsky.social
| 🫶 | she/her |
🗺📍dc
"the darkness do be encroaching, tho"
🗺📍dc
"the darkness do be encroaching, tho"
This does make me curious, tho!
Tell me about a holiday where you ended up not being able to do the traditional food fare, whether by choice or calamity lol
What did you do instead??
Tell me about a holiday where you ended up not being able to do the traditional food fare, whether by choice or calamity lol
What did you do instead??
If your turkey is over 10 pounds, it's too late to safely get it from frozen to cook-ready before Thanksgiving dinner
Start developing your Plan B, beloved
Start developing your Plan B, beloved
November 25, 2025 at 6:18 PM
This does make me curious, tho!
Tell me about a holiday where you ended up not being able to do the traditional food fare, whether by choice or calamity lol
What did you do instead??
Tell me about a holiday where you ended up not being able to do the traditional food fare, whether by choice or calamity lol
What did you do instead??
If your turkey is over 10 pounds, it's too late to safely get it from frozen to cook-ready before Thanksgiving dinner
Start developing your Plan B, beloved
Start developing your Plan B, beloved
November 25, 2025 at 5:32 PM
If your turkey is over 10 pounds, it's too late to safely get it from frozen to cook-ready before Thanksgiving dinner
Start developing your Plan B, beloved
Start developing your Plan B, beloved
The internet is theorizing that Steve Harrington is going to die in the final season of Stranger Things and let me tell youuuuuu
If that happens I'm logging off for 3-5 business weeks to CRY
If that happens I'm logging off for 3-5 business weeks to CRY
November 25, 2025 at 4:03 PM
The internet is theorizing that Steve Harrington is going to die in the final season of Stranger Things and let me tell youuuuuu
If that happens I'm logging off for 3-5 business weeks to CRY
If that happens I'm logging off for 3-5 business weeks to CRY
"I still think that should be the thing for which he's the most famous.
It should be brought up every time he's mentioned.
In any news article, any interview, any history book.
'Elon Musk, who was offered a chance to end world hunger and turned it down.'
Put it on his fucking gravestone."
It should be brought up every time he's mentioned.
In any news article, any interview, any history book.
'Elon Musk, who was offered a chance to end world hunger and turned it down.'
Put it on his fucking gravestone."
November 25, 2025 at 3:23 PM
"I still think that should be the thing for which he's the most famous.
It should be brought up every time he's mentioned.
In any news article, any interview, any history book.
'Elon Musk, who was offered a chance to end world hunger and turned it down.'
Put it on his fucking gravestone."
It should be brought up every time he's mentioned.
In any news article, any interview, any history book.
'Elon Musk, who was offered a chance to end world hunger and turned it down.'
Put it on his fucking gravestone."
I spent Thanksgiving with my half-sister and her family a few yrs ago.
Halfway through the meal, her brother's girlfriend's kid's dad and HIS gf showed up to pick up said kid
Stayed for an HOUR making small talk with sister & BIL while the rest of us tried to decide if it was rude to keep eating
Halfway through the meal, her brother's girlfriend's kid's dad and HIS gf showed up to pick up said kid
Stayed for an HOUR making small talk with sister & BIL while the rest of us tried to decide if it was rude to keep eating
yes, hello, I would like to place an order for everyone’s funniest stories of holiday food-related family grudges / drama / chaotic incidents / lore
I feel like we need this
I feel like we need this
November 25, 2025 at 3:31 AM
I spent Thanksgiving with my half-sister and her family a few yrs ago.
Halfway through the meal, her brother's girlfriend's kid's dad and HIS gf showed up to pick up said kid
Stayed for an HOUR making small talk with sister & BIL while the rest of us tried to decide if it was rude to keep eating
Halfway through the meal, her brother's girlfriend's kid's dad and HIS gf showed up to pick up said kid
Stayed for an HOUR making small talk with sister & BIL while the rest of us tried to decide if it was rude to keep eating
Reposted by jordan, but spooky 👻🦇🎃
In Hollywood boys are allowed to be monsters as a challenge they can heroically overcome but girl monsters are usually only allowed to exist in relation to how dangerous they are to boys
November 24, 2025 at 2:48 AM
In Hollywood boys are allowed to be monsters as a challenge they can heroically overcome but girl monsters are usually only allowed to exist in relation to how dangerous they are to boys
This is actually my largest legitimate gripe with the work of GDT
Has this pairing ever been flipped? Where a man falls in love with a monster?
November 24, 2025 at 8:14 PM
This is actually my largest legitimate gripe with the work of GDT
I keep seeing people saying "DOGE failed, it was a spectacular failure" etc
No, it did exactly what was intended
No, it did exactly what was intended
November 24, 2025 at 3:48 PM
I keep seeing people saying "DOGE failed, it was a spectacular failure" etc
No, it did exactly what was intended
No, it did exactly what was intended
Also if you haven't watched Haunted Hotel on Netflix what are you even doing
It's only 8 episodes and all of them are hilarious & charming
Voice acting cast is 🤌🤌🤌
It's only 8 episodes and all of them are hilarious & charming
Voice acting cast is 🤌🤌🤌
I'm afraid that rather than narrowing next year's Halloween choices down, I've added another option 🫣🫣
Really just need someone to pay me to do this full-time so I don't have to choose
Really just need someone to pay me to do this full-time so I don't have to choose
November 23, 2025 at 9:25 PM
Also if you haven't watched Haunted Hotel on Netflix what are you even doing
It's only 8 episodes and all of them are hilarious & charming
Voice acting cast is 🤌🤌🤌
It's only 8 episodes and all of them are hilarious & charming
Voice acting cast is 🤌🤌🤌
I used to think turkey was difficult to cook well until I dry bribed and spatchcocked my turkey one year
Everyone should spatchcock their turkey, it is truly a game changer
Everyone should spatchcock their turkey, it is truly a game changer
I think this is unfair to turkey. turkey is good but hard to cook well because it is so damn big. turkey *parts* are great but lack the esthetic appeal of a centerpiece bird.
it is tired to the point of cliche to say if turkey was good, people would make it more than once a year. but it is understated that at least one American explodes every Thanksgiving in a brave attempt to make the main dish more palatable
November 23, 2025 at 8:40 PM
I used to think turkey was difficult to cook well until I dry bribed and spatchcocked my turkey one year
Everyone should spatchcock their turkey, it is truly a game changer
Everyone should spatchcock their turkey, it is truly a game changer
Reposted by jordan, but spooky 👻🦇🎃
Just a friendly reminder as we go into the holidays:
Folks don't have to explain to you why they don't drink.
If you offer them a drink and they decline, don't ask them why. It's not your business.
Just offer them something without alcohol to drink instead. And move on.
Folks don't have to explain to you why they don't drink.
If you offer them a drink and they decline, don't ask them why. It's not your business.
Just offer them something without alcohol to drink instead. And move on.
November 23, 2025 at 8:04 PM
Just a friendly reminder as we go into the holidays:
Folks don't have to explain to you why they don't drink.
If you offer them a drink and they decline, don't ask them why. It's not your business.
Just offer them something without alcohol to drink instead. And move on.
Folks don't have to explain to you why they don't drink.
If you offer them a drink and they decline, don't ask them why. It's not your business.
Just offer them something without alcohol to drink instead. And move on.
This was actually helpful, ty 🫶
There was a vendor at the art market yesterday selling vintage rosaries and I couldn't articulate why it weirded me out haha
There was a vendor at the art market yesterday selling vintage rosaries and I couldn't articulate why it weirded me out haha
Hello cradle Catholics,
I am conducting a very scientific poll;
would you purchase a vintage rosary or do you think it's likely to be haunted and/or have bad juju
I am conducting a very scientific poll;
would you purchase a vintage rosary or do you think it's likely to be haunted and/or have bad juju
November 23, 2025 at 8:21 PM
This was actually helpful, ty 🫶
There was a vendor at the art market yesterday selling vintage rosaries and I couldn't articulate why it weirded me out haha
There was a vendor at the art market yesterday selling vintage rosaries and I couldn't articulate why it weirded me out haha
I'm afraid that rather than narrowing next year's Halloween choices down, I've added another option 🫣🫣
Really just need someone to pay me to do this full-time so I don't have to choose
Really just need someone to pay me to do this full-time so I don't have to choose
November 23, 2025 at 6:07 PM
I'm afraid that rather than narrowing next year's Halloween choices down, I've added another option 🫣🫣
Really just need someone to pay me to do this full-time so I don't have to choose
Really just need someone to pay me to do this full-time so I don't have to choose
I did look at what it would cost me to fly first class to Japan when I go (hopefully next year 🤞) and uhhhh yeah, economy is the life for me I guess 🫠
I would probably dress nicer when I fly if I didn't have to take half of it off to get through security, and if the seating situation on the plane didn't make me feel like a sardine in a can
Duffy: "Trump talks about the golden age of transportation. But the golden age in transportation truly begins with you ... People dress up like they're going to bed when they fly ... so we want to push people as we come into a really busy travel season: Help people out, be in a good mood, dress up"
November 23, 2025 at 4:10 PM
I did look at what it would cost me to fly first class to Japan when I go (hopefully next year 🤞) and uhhhh yeah, economy is the life for me I guess 🫠
I would probably dress nicer when I fly if I didn't have to take half of it off to get through security, and if the seating situation on the plane didn't make me feel like a sardine in a can
Duffy: "Trump talks about the golden age of transportation. But the golden age in transportation truly begins with you ... People dress up like they're going to bed when they fly ... so we want to push people as we come into a really busy travel season: Help people out, be in a good mood, dress up"
November 23, 2025 at 2:46 PM
I would probably dress nicer when I fly if I didn't have to take half of it off to get through security, and if the seating situation on the plane didn't make me feel like a sardine in a can
Hello cradle Catholics,
I am conducting a very scientific poll;
would you purchase a vintage rosary or do you think it's likely to be haunted and/or have bad juju
I am conducting a very scientific poll;
would you purchase a vintage rosary or do you think it's likely to be haunted and/or have bad juju
November 23, 2025 at 1:16 AM
Hello cradle Catholics,
I am conducting a very scientific poll;
would you purchase a vintage rosary or do you think it's likely to be haunted and/or have bad juju
I am conducting a very scientific poll;
would you purchase a vintage rosary or do you think it's likely to be haunted and/or have bad juju
I regret to inform you that NatureMade made a spiritual sequel to that coffee commercial where the brother and sister want to bone
November 22, 2025 at 10:44 PM
I regret to inform you that NatureMade made a spiritual sequel to that coffee commercial where the brother and sister want to bone
Went to a "punk rock flea market" in dc today :)
November 22, 2025 at 9:50 PM
Went to a "punk rock flea market" in dc today :)
It doesn't matter how queer or how leftist the space you're in is, a cis man is going to bump into you and not apologize
November 22, 2025 at 9:40 PM
It doesn't matter how queer or how leftist the space you're in is, a cis man is going to bump into you and not apologize
Reposted by jordan, but spooky 👻🦇🎃
ATTENTION: today is the day to take your turkey from the freezer and put it in the fridge for thawing
November 22, 2025 at 4:04 PM
ATTENTION: today is the day to take your turkey from the freezer and put it in the fridge for thawing
Everything I've learned about Olivia Nuzzi has been against my will
And then I finally see a photo of her today and learn that all this hubbub is over a woman who's well and truly busted??
Let me log off
And then I finally see a photo of her today and learn that all this hubbub is over a woman who's well and truly busted??
Let me log off
November 22, 2025 at 2:25 PM
Everything I've learned about Olivia Nuzzi has been against my will
And then I finally see a photo of her today and learn that all this hubbub is over a woman who's well and truly busted??
Let me log off
And then I finally see a photo of her today and learn that all this hubbub is over a woman who's well and truly busted??
Let me log off
First game of the regular season 🥹
November 22, 2025 at 2:45 AM
First game of the regular season 🥹
I am sorry to say this but this resembles how the cancer kids look at John Cena when he does make a wish outreach
November 22, 2025 at 12:00 AM
I am sorry to say this but this resembles how the cancer kids look at John Cena when he does make a wish outreach