Lord Emp
@emperorgoblin.bsky.social
(he/him) Raised by hyenas.
Pinned
Lord Emp
@emperorgoblin.bsky.social
· Jun 30
For anyone checking out my profile because of an immigration thread, I was an immigration services officer with USCIS specializing in children's citizenship issues and was widely considered the national expert on such while I was there. I later wrote policy for the department. I know my shit.
I always find the beeping.
Happy International Men’s Day to the guys juggling jobs, families, and random mystery household noises they’re expected to identify on command. You’re doing great, even if you don’t know where the beeping is coming from.
November 20, 2025 at 2:48 PM
I always find the beeping.
I traveled in Spain a while back with a vegetarian fellow named Thom. He explained to a cook at a restaurant that he didn't eat meat and asked what they have on the menu that didn't include meat. The cook thought for a moment and replied, in all seriousness, 'we have chicken.'
"I've made a vegetable risotto," my mum announced, "with chorizo and kabanos"
November 20, 2025 at 12:40 PM
I traveled in Spain a while back with a vegetarian fellow named Thom. He explained to a cook at a restaurant that he didn't eat meat and asked what they have on the menu that didn't include meat. The cook thought for a moment and replied, in all seriousness, 'we have chicken.'
The algorithm has once again determined I am a Very Specific Way and also Grossly Enthusiastic about that.
November 18, 2025 at 12:28 PM
The algorithm has once again determined I am a Very Specific Way and also Grossly Enthusiastic about that.
Getting ready to search myself on WeChat
November 16, 2025 at 11:34 PM
Getting ready to search myself on WeChat
*screaming*
November 16, 2025 at 3:49 PM
*screaming*
I told a friend once, people who like music like Tears for Fears.
(Kind of an emphasis on 'music'. Not exactly a Capital M music, but something there)
Listening to 'Sowing the Seeds of Love' and still convinced this is true.
(Kind of an emphasis on 'music'. Not exactly a Capital M music, but something there)
Listening to 'Sowing the Seeds of Love' and still convinced this is true.
November 16, 2025 at 3:28 AM
I told a friend once, people who like music like Tears for Fears.
(Kind of an emphasis on 'music'. Not exactly a Capital M music, but something there)
Listening to 'Sowing the Seeds of Love' and still convinced this is true.
(Kind of an emphasis on 'music'. Not exactly a Capital M music, but something there)
Listening to 'Sowing the Seeds of Love' and still convinced this is true.
The songs I'm hearing on this flight:
The Big Bamboozle - Barry Admission
This is a lurid and off-putting piece. Bourbon-soaked jazz while Quentin Tarantino fast forwards through vintage laser disc editions of noir films.
The Big Bamboozle - Barry Admission
This is a lurid and off-putting piece. Bourbon-soaked jazz while Quentin Tarantino fast forwards through vintage laser disc editions of noir films.
November 16, 2025 at 1:28 AM
The songs I'm hearing on this flight:
The Big Bamboozle - Barry Admission
This is a lurid and off-putting piece. Bourbon-soaked jazz while Quentin Tarantino fast forwards through vintage laser disc editions of noir films.
The Big Bamboozle - Barry Admission
This is a lurid and off-putting piece. Bourbon-soaked jazz while Quentin Tarantino fast forwards through vintage laser disc editions of noir films.
After a week of hanging out with lawyers I just need a pile of music to consume.
Hit me with your recommendations or current obsessions.
Hit me with your recommendations or current obsessions.
November 15, 2025 at 11:22 PM
After a week of hanging out with lawyers I just need a pile of music to consume.
Hit me with your recommendations or current obsessions.
Hit me with your recommendations or current obsessions.
Sponge was a totally underrated act. The song 'Plowed' has been following me around a bit. It's currently playing in the airport bar in Denver.
Their later record, Wax Ecstatic was on heavy rotation for me for years. 'Drag Queens of Memphis' lives for cheap rent in my head most of the time.
Their later record, Wax Ecstatic was on heavy rotation for me for years. 'Drag Queens of Memphis' lives for cheap rent in my head most of the time.
Sponge - Plowed
YouTube video by HQ Rare Music Videos
youtu.be
November 15, 2025 at 11:19 PM
Sponge was a totally underrated act. The song 'Plowed' has been following me around a bit. It's currently playing in the airport bar in Denver.
Their later record, Wax Ecstatic was on heavy rotation for me for years. 'Drag Queens of Memphis' lives for cheap rent in my head most of the time.
Their later record, Wax Ecstatic was on heavy rotation for me for years. 'Drag Queens of Memphis' lives for cheap rent in my head most of the time.
This should be litigated and it will fail. Extremely bad interpretation.
www.axios.com/2025/11/13/s...
www.axios.com/2025/11/13/s...
State Department says visas can be denied over diabetes, obesity: reports
The guidance gives officers more reasons to turn away applicants.
www.axios.com
November 15, 2025 at 8:10 PM
This should be litigated and it will fail. Extremely bad interpretation.
www.axios.com/2025/11/13/s...
www.axios.com/2025/11/13/s...
Reposted by Lord Emp
Woody Guthrie~ All You Fascists Bound To Lose
YouTube video by UnAmericanBandstand
www.youtube.com
November 15, 2025 at 5:00 AM
At an immigration lawyer conference and man, this is ground zero for AuDHD
November 14, 2025 at 4:57 PM
At an immigration lawyer conference and man, this is ground zero for AuDHD
Reposted by Lord Emp
NEW: The first two years of Massachusetts' millionaire tax has raised $3 billion more than expected.
And rather than driving the rich away, IPS researchers found that the number of millionaires has *increased.*
Tax the rich. Greg Ryan in @bloomberg.com:
And rather than driving the rich away, IPS researchers found that the number of millionaires has *increased.*
Tax the rich. Greg Ryan in @bloomberg.com:
Millionaire Tax That Inspired Mamdani Fuels $5.7 Billion Haul in Massachusetts
A millionaire levy in Massachusetts that New York City mayoral frontrunner Zohran Mamdani holds up as a model for taxing the rich has generated $3 billion more in revenue than expected without forcing...
www.bloomberg.com
November 12, 2025 at 4:01 PM
NEW: The first two years of Massachusetts' millionaire tax has raised $3 billion more than expected.
And rather than driving the rich away, IPS researchers found that the number of millionaires has *increased.*
Tax the rich. Greg Ryan in @bloomberg.com:
And rather than driving the rich away, IPS researchers found that the number of millionaires has *increased.*
Tax the rich. Greg Ryan in @bloomberg.com:
People standing around applauding the president signing the 2 month stopgap spending bill is like cheering when a constipated toddler shits his pants, knowing that he was constipated because he consciously refused to shit for a week.
(Parents know this one)
(Parents know this one)
November 13, 2025 at 1:25 PM
People standing around applauding the president signing the 2 month stopgap spending bill is like cheering when a constipated toddler shits his pants, knowing that he was constipated because he consciously refused to shit for a week.
(Parents know this one)
(Parents know this one)
Half of Bsky: SEX PESTS ARE RUINING EVERYTHING
Other half: SKY PRETTY!!!!
Other half: SKY PRETTY!!!!
November 13, 2025 at 1:53 AM
Half of Bsky: SEX PESTS ARE RUINING EVERYTHING
Other half: SKY PRETTY!!!!
Other half: SKY PRETTY!!!!
THAT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!
(Narrator: It was, in fact, much worse.)
(Narrator: It was, in fact, much worse.)
November 13, 2025 at 1:43 AM
THAT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!
(Narrator: It was, in fact, much worse.)
(Narrator: It was, in fact, much worse.)
Greetings. From Irvine.
November 13, 2025 at 1:33 AM
Greetings. From Irvine.
'Don't criticize the Democrats, it is a chess game and they're looking two moves ahead, sometimes you have to sacrifice a piece to advance and win the game.'
(The sacrificed pieces are real people who will starve)
(Republicans are playing rugby and also cheating at that)
(The sacrificed pieces are real people who will starve)
(Republicans are playing rugby and also cheating at that)
November 11, 2025 at 7:56 PM
'Don't criticize the Democrats, it is a chess game and they're looking two moves ahead, sometimes you have to sacrifice a piece to advance and win the game.'
(The sacrificed pieces are real people who will starve)
(Republicans are playing rugby and also cheating at that)
(The sacrificed pieces are real people who will starve)
(Republicans are playing rugby and also cheating at that)
I hope people remember that our Veterans Day in the US is the same as Armistice Day elsewhere. We created this holiday to honor the end of war, the retirement of soldiers, and the acceptance of peacetime. It's an ideal and a dream but it's an important one.
November 11, 2025 at 1:30 PM
I hope people remember that our Veterans Day in the US is the same as Armistice Day elsewhere. We created this holiday to honor the end of war, the retirement of soldiers, and the acceptance of peacetime. It's an ideal and a dream but it's an important one.
The struggle with being a cynic is that you know that things could always be better. You know this, because you know that things are often at their worst. Still, we can be disappointed. We are disappointed.
November 10, 2025 at 2:28 AM
The struggle with being a cynic is that you know that things could always be better. You know this, because you know that things are often at their worst. Still, we can be disappointed. We are disappointed.
'Weapons' was just grand.
November 10, 2025 at 1:47 AM
'Weapons' was just grand.
My sourdough bread can be used as a stylus for a touchscreen device. Explain.
November 9, 2025 at 11:01 PM
My sourdough bread can be used as a stylus for a touchscreen device. Explain.
To the dad at Target with the large pack of maxipads and a giant bag of peanut m&ms: bless you sir.
November 9, 2025 at 6:33 PM
To the dad at Target with the large pack of maxipads and a giant bag of peanut m&ms: bless you sir.
12,400 pennies.
I deeply hate this advertisement-article bullshit headline trend. It doesn't fall to 'pennies'. It's like a 15% discount. It's fine. Don't cream your jeans man.
I deeply hate this advertisement-article bullshit headline trend. It doesn't fall to 'pennies'. It's like a 15% discount. It's fine. Don't cream your jeans man.
Shokz OpenRun Pro Bone Conduction Headphones Fall to Pennies, Cheaper Than a Single Month at the Gym
Bone conduction headphones deliver 10-hour battery life and premium bass for runners, and it's at a new record low for early Black Friday.
gizmodo.com
November 8, 2025 at 11:25 PM
12,400 pennies.
I deeply hate this advertisement-article bullshit headline trend. It doesn't fall to 'pennies'. It's like a 15% discount. It's fine. Don't cream your jeans man.
I deeply hate this advertisement-article bullshit headline trend. It doesn't fall to 'pennies'. It's like a 15% discount. It's fine. Don't cream your jeans man.