chris balser 🖤
@doomfunk.bsky.social
systems designer. artist. writer. doer of silly voices. salmiakki advocate. worked on ESO, Starfield, Diablo 4, Cyberpunk 2.
Pinned
chris balser 🖤
@doomfunk.bsky.social
· Jul 5
Hi, I'm Chris! And I'm currently out of work and seeking employment. I am a career game designer, having done primarily RPG systems work but also quest/narrative and combat/encounter content. I am also a visual artist, writer, and voice actor. If you could use someone like me, hit my DMs.
quote with your fan art
November 16, 2025 at 10:11 PM
quote with your fan art
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
Do You Know Squarepusher?
I forgot how good squarepusher is, I won’t do it again though
November 16, 2025 at 8:24 PM
Do You Know Squarepusher?
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
usually a game doesn't want or need this so it's not worth doing. however, a game where you're totally comfortable burdening the player with incredibly foul vibes and reminding them constantly that they've fucked this whole situation up by killing everyone? there's some juice there.
Hive mind.. whats the general thoughts on allowing players to brick their games by letting them kill NPCs? Are folk ok with that? any smart examples where it is recoverable?
November 15, 2025 at 11:31 PM
usually a game doesn't want or need this so it's not worth doing. however, a game where you're totally comfortable burdening the player with incredibly foul vibes and reminding them constantly that they've fucked this whole situation up by killing everyone? there's some juice there.
oh my god the force of this barf
For #FossilFriday & in honor of @alinemghilardi.bsky.social & colleagues' fantastic discovery of a new Cretaceous pterosaur in Brazil in a dinosaur regurgitalite ("fossil vomit"), here's a diagram I made for my book 'Dinosaurs Without Bones' (2014) showing the physics of a puking brachiosaur. 🧪🦕🤮🪨
November 14, 2025 at 11:23 PM
oh my god the force of this barf
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
if this shit were easy, we wouldn't be in year 45 of the Posters Vs Mods war
November 14, 2025 at 3:53 PM
if this shit were easy, we wouldn't be in year 45 of the Posters Vs Mods war
German folk and fairytales are pretty fun. one I'm pretty fond of is this one, which is basically about a juvenile soulslike protagonist trying to learn normal human reactions. there's even a patches figure in it!
www.grimmstories.com/en/grimm_fai...
www.grimmstories.com/en/grimm_fai...
November 14, 2025 at 12:58 PM
German folk and fairytales are pretty fun. one I'm pretty fond of is this one, which is basically about a juvenile soulslike protagonist trying to learn normal human reactions. there's even a patches figure in it!
www.grimmstories.com/en/grimm_fai...
www.grimmstories.com/en/grimm_fai...
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
it's on miro. it's literally on figma. you have to log into okta. it's in jira. it's on zoom. it's on pureref. it's on flow. it's on perforce. it's on slack. you can find it on slack. you can go to slack and find it. log onto slack right now. you can slack it. slack has it for you. it's on slack.
November 12, 2025 at 10:15 PM
it's on miro. it's literally on figma. you have to log into okta. it's in jira. it's on zoom. it's on pureref. it's on flow. it's on perforce. it's on slack. you can find it on slack. you can go to slack and find it. log onto slack right now. you can slack it. slack has it for you. it's on slack.
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
ONE WEEK! UNTIL DEMONSCHOOL!!!! store.steampowered.com/app/1900250/...
November 12, 2025 at 6:32 PM
ONE WEEK! UNTIL DEMONSCHOOL!!!! store.steampowered.com/app/1900250/...
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
Finally, Gabecube
Steam Frame, Steam Controller, Steam Machine announcement is expected soon, here's a first look!
November 12, 2025 at 5:26 PM
Finally, Gabecube
poison swamp. already got one? make it ten
November 11, 2025 at 7:06 PM
poison swamp. already got one? make it ten
I'm liminally performant. I do not impact the client in any meaningful way as long as I'm not near the crosshair.
I'm liminally performative: maybe THIS is the post that will go viral. Maybe not?
I'm performatively liminal, which means I'm standing on a cliff going "OOOOH MAYBE I'LL JUMP, MAYBE I'M A REPRESENTATION OF CROSSING A THRESHOLD THAT CANNOT BE UNCROSSED, OOOOOOH"
November 10, 2025 at 10:20 PM
I'm liminally performant. I do not impact the client in any meaningful way as long as I'm not near the crosshair.
okay Mr. Laurence Fishburne as Emiel Regis is some incredible casting, costuming, and delivery. he's a delight. I love Regis, always have, and Fishburne is just captivating in the role.
November 10, 2025 at 8:35 PM
okay Mr. Laurence Fishburne as Emiel Regis is some incredible casting, costuming, and delivery. he's a delight. I love Regis, always have, and Fishburne is just captivating in the role.
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
Sorry one more
November 9, 2025 at 4:23 PM
Sorry one more
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
also if you guys enjoyed gdt’s frankenstein please watch crimson peak. one of his best movies that got absolutely slept on bc there was like no marketing.
November 7, 2025 at 7:12 PM
also if you guys enjoyed gdt’s frankenstein please watch crimson peak. one of his best movies that got absolutely slept on bc there was like no marketing.
I know this is making waves but these exact requirements were expectations in a training video I was shown when I was hired at target a long, long time ago. they've always wanted the team to be like this.
"Store employees are now required to smile if they are within 10 feet of a shopper.
They also must make eye contact with and wave to or greet the customer.
If they’re within four feet, the employee should ask how the customer’s day is going or if they need help."
🙄 Won't stop the boycott, y'all.
They also must make eye contact with and wave to or greet the customer.
If they’re within four feet, the employee should ask how the customer’s day is going or if they need help."
🙄 Won't stop the boycott, y'all.
Target is now requiring its employees to smile more
As the holiday season fast approaches, Target is urging its employees to add a little more “jolly” to their work routine.
www.wilx.com
November 8, 2025 at 8:45 PM
I know this is making waves but these exact requirements were expectations in a training video I was shown when I was hired at target a long, long time ago. they've always wanted the team to be like this.
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
warner brothers trickster figures explained
November 8, 2025 at 3:23 AM
warner brothers trickster figures explained
sipping my tea, staring out a window,
leaves fall from the trees
it's time to face a dread task
cleaning out my purse
leaves fall from the trees
it's time to face a dread task
cleaning out my purse
November 8, 2025 at 4:17 PM
sipping my tea, staring out a window,
leaves fall from the trees
it's time to face a dread task
cleaning out my purse
leaves fall from the trees
it's time to face a dread task
cleaning out my purse
oh shit
Hey, do you like violent video games? Because the alpha demo playtest of MÖRK BORG Heresy Supreme is now LIVE on Steam.
store.steampowered.com/app/3216800/...
store.steampowered.com/app/3216800/...
MÖRK BORG Heresy Supreme on Steam
MÖRK BORG Heresy Supreme is a doom-metal action RPG set in the world of MÖRK BORG. Wretched antiheroes explore a side-scrolling, semi-procedural grimdark fantasy world, searching for a way to prevent ...
store.steampowered.com
November 6, 2025 at 2:13 PM
oh shit
no matter what lexa says about the game it's great. strong rec from me
fucking uuugh the game is on fucking sale I have no energy to promote it anymore it's more than a year old it should be taken for a walk behind a shed and shot in the back of its fucking head please retweet
November 6, 2025 at 1:58 PM
no matter what lexa says about the game it's great. strong rec from me
Reposted by chris balser 🖤
TWO WEEKS UNTIL DEMONSCHOOL
November 5, 2025 at 5:59 PM
TWO WEEKS UNTIL DEMONSCHOOL
step 1: start a pot of water, a bit of salt, and a bit of oil boiling. once it rolls add your rice, reduce, cover til moist and fluffy. usually 1.5 cups water to 1 cup rice for the jasmine rice I buy.
step 2: black beans or lentils, a little tomato paste, diced onion, a little water to get it mixed.
step 2: black beans or lentils, a little tomato paste, diced onion, a little water to get it mixed.
IT IS TIME FOR BLUESKY RECIPE POSTING
do you have a cheap, healthy, low-cost recipe? post it here! or quote tweet this post. or dunk on me for something I don't care just post easy meals that people can make right now.
do you have a cheap, healthy, low-cost recipe? post it here! or quote tweet this post. or dunk on me for something I don't care just post easy meals that people can make right now.
November 4, 2025 at 3:11 AM
step 1: start a pot of water, a bit of salt, and a bit of oil boiling. once it rolls add your rice, reduce, cover til moist and fluffy. usually 1.5 cups water to 1 cup rice for the jasmine rice I buy.
step 2: black beans or lentils, a little tomato paste, diced onion, a little water to get it mixed.
step 2: black beans or lentils, a little tomato paste, diced onion, a little water to get it mixed.
I've offhandedly mentioned this elsewhere but my first exposure to John Cleese was the Schweppes ads on the VHS releases of James Bond movies and when I finally got into Monty Python I had a big "oh I see" about him.
ages later he was Cadwell on ESO, so
...
ages later he was Cadwell on ESO, so
...
I think everybody has a “Wallace Shawn from Young Sheldon” — my first one would probably be “Vincent Price, the guy who did the voice of Ratigan in The Great Mouse Detective”
November 3, 2025 at 9:07 PM
I've offhandedly mentioned this elsewhere but my first exposure to John Cleese was the Schweppes ads on the VHS releases of James Bond movies and when I finally got into Monty Python I had a big "oh I see" about him.
ages later he was Cadwell on ESO, so
...
ages later he was Cadwell on ESO, so
...