Martin W
@dmartw.bsky.social
Muddling through life trying to be nice. Somewhere oop north.
Looks like someone's nan off to the bingo in Benidorm.
November 11, 2025 at 3:09 PM
Looks like someone's nan off to the bingo in Benidorm.
Reposted by Martin W
After our 7th failed round of IVF, I decided that I didn't want kids. Didn't want to upset my wife so kept my mouth shut and paid another round expecting it to fail. Daughters just turned one and is the absolute love of my life. Thank god I'm a conflict avoider
November 10, 2025 at 8:20 PM
After our 7th failed round of IVF, I decided that I didn't want kids. Didn't want to upset my wife so kept my mouth shut and paid another round expecting it to fail. Daughters just turned one and is the absolute love of my life. Thank god I'm a conflict avoider
Turn up uninvited at my house and you'll be warmly welcomed, but expected to fuck off after thirty minutes max. Tell me you're coming and you can stay as long as you like. It's all about expectation.
As an adult you should have sugar, tea, coffee and milk in your house regardless of whether you use them. Basic hosting.
November 11, 2025 at 8:16 AM
Turn up uninvited at my house and you'll be warmly welcomed, but expected to fuck off after thirty minutes max. Tell me you're coming and you can stay as long as you like. It's all about expectation.
All streaming services try to get you to go ad-free by placing the shittiest adverts at the worst possible moments in the shows.
"You're emotionally wrecked after that reveal are you? Here's a gambling ad!"
Fuck off!
"You're emotionally wrecked after that reveal are you? Here's a gambling ad!"
Fuck off!
November 10, 2025 at 4:08 PM
All streaming services try to get you to go ad-free by placing the shittiest adverts at the worst possible moments in the shows.
"You're emotionally wrecked after that reveal are you? Here's a gambling ad!"
Fuck off!
"You're emotionally wrecked after that reveal are you? Here's a gambling ad!"
Fuck off!
Reposted by Martin W
We used to have an Eastern European cleaner, took her ages to hoover the house.
Turns out she was a Slovak 👍🏼👍🏼
Turns out she was a Slovak 👍🏼👍🏼
November 10, 2025 at 12:12 PM
We used to have an Eastern European cleaner, took her ages to hoover the house.
Turns out she was a Slovak 👍🏼👍🏼
Turns out she was a Slovak 👍🏼👍🏼
Reposted by Martin W
all this, in my opinion, began when they cancelled bonekickers
November 10, 2025 at 1:04 PM
all this, in my opinion, began when they cancelled bonekickers
Today is my first physio appointment to get the old ticker up and running properly. Aversion to exercise is probably one of the causes of my current predicament.
November 10, 2025 at 9:57 AM
Today is my first physio appointment to get the old ticker up and running properly. Aversion to exercise is probably one of the causes of my current predicament.
Reposted by Martin W
“And what time do you call this to be rolling in? Look at your mother, she’s been worried sick”
November 9, 2025 at 7:46 PM
“And what time do you call this to be rolling in? Look at your mother, she’s been worried sick”
Back to work tonight for the first time in two months. It's going to feel strange due to the death of a much loved friend and colleague earlier this week.
November 7, 2025 at 8:55 PM
Back to work tonight for the first time in two months. It's going to feel strange due to the death of a much loved friend and colleague earlier this week.
Stand Up For Your Love Rights beats The Only Way Is Up hands down, particularly this version. #TOTP
youtu.be/1cmaukck1r8?...
youtu.be/1cmaukck1r8?...
Yazz – Stand Up For Your Love Rights (The Stadium Disco Mix)
YouTube video by Broeibak Records
youtu.be
November 7, 2025 at 8:49 PM
Stand Up For Your Love Rights beats The Only Way Is Up hands down, particularly this version. #TOTP
youtu.be/1cmaukck1r8?...
youtu.be/1cmaukck1r8?...
I couldn't stand Stock, Aitken and fucking Waterman and turned off the radio whenever the songs came on, yet I know every word of Je Ne Sais Pas Porquois. How does that work? #TOTP
November 7, 2025 at 8:46 PM
I couldn't stand Stock, Aitken and fucking Waterman and turned off the radio whenever the songs came on, yet I know every word of Je Ne Sais Pas Porquois. How does that work? #TOTP
November 7, 2025 at 8:32 PM
Why is there no snow on the hills? Is Emmerdale actually in a snow globe, like St. Elsewhere was?
Enchanted by the publishing micro-genre "Christmas novelisations of TV soaps but also it's wartime for some reason".
November 7, 2025 at 9:59 AM
Why is there no snow on the hills? Is Emmerdale actually in a snow globe, like St. Elsewhere was?
Reposted by Martin W
Enjoy a representative video of my cat. Happy birthday Sierra!
November 5, 2025 at 5:11 AM
Enjoy a representative video of my cat. Happy birthday Sierra!
Explain a film plot badly:
Two young ladies misuse a crockery item.
Two young ladies misuse a crockery item.
Explain a film plot badly:
Two detectives fail to catch a biblical serial killer & one of the detectives doesn’t need a divorce at the end.
Two detectives fail to catch a biblical serial killer & one of the detectives doesn’t need a divorce at the end.
Explain a film plot badly:
Bunch of reporters fail to discover name of a sled.
Bunch of reporters fail to discover name of a sled.
November 6, 2025 at 6:56 PM
Explain a film plot badly:
Two young ladies misuse a crockery item.
Two young ladies misuse a crockery item.
I've just watched the trailer and I haven't laughed as much in ages. So bad it's bad.
Is Kim Kardashian’s legal drama All’s Fair really the worst TV show of all time?
Is Kim Kardashian’s legal drama All’s Fair really the worst TV show of all time?
Ryan Murphy’s glossy, star-packed new show has received some of the most shocking reviews we’ve seen for a long time, including many zero star takes
www.theguardian.com
November 6, 2025 at 11:45 AM
I've just watched the trailer and I haven't laughed as much in ages. So bad it's bad.
Reposted by Martin W
At least they won't have to clean their clothes.
November 6, 2025 at 10:27 AM
At least they won't have to clean their clothes.
Just found out a friend of mine has died of cardiac arrest. She was the same age as me. There for the grace of God and all that. Getting old fucking sucks.
November 5, 2025 at 9:34 PM
Just found out a friend of mine has died of cardiac arrest. She was the same age as me. There for the grace of God and all that. Getting old fucking sucks.
Reposted by Martin W
Bloody Hell, no wonder K-9 and Company didn’t get picked up.
November 5, 2025 at 3:36 PM
Bloody Hell, no wonder K-9 and Company didn’t get picked up.