Dennis B. Hooper
@dennisbhooper.bsky.social
tall gay nerd. he/him. advanced degrees in height, gayness, nerdness.
reality show editor, work seen on a&e, bravo, quibi. maker of goofy photoshops and questionable victorian detective satire.
writing, etc: https://linktr.ee/dennisbhooper
reality show editor, work seen on a&e, bravo, quibi. maker of goofy photoshops and questionable victorian detective satire.
writing, etc: https://linktr.ee/dennisbhooper
Pinned
ANNOUNCEMENT: So for the last few months i’ve been hard at work on a novel, and therefore don’t have anything new in the way of detective stories, or anything else.
But I wanted to put *something* out there, so this is a quick little 5 minute humor piece.
But I wanted to put *something* out there, so this is a quick little 5 minute humor piece.
Hi everyone, I’m a reality show editor who also writes things for fun. You can find examples of my work in this thread. The first is a quick and deeply silly piece of flash fiction in the style of a Hollywood memoir:
Reposted by Dennis B. Hooper
CHOTINER: And the pizza place, what’s it called?
ME: Dominos.
CHOTINER: Right. And you can order from your laptop?
ME: Yeah. Well, I can also use my phone. Sometimes that’s quicker.
CHOTINER: And all the food in your fridge and pantry. When do you eat that?
ME: Now hang on a second,
ME: Dominos.
CHOTINER: Right. And you can order from your laptop?
ME: Yeah. Well, I can also use my phone. Sometimes that’s quicker.
CHOTINER: And all the food in your fridge and pantry. When do you eat that?
ME: Now hang on a second,
September 23, 2025 at 10:17 PM
CHOTINER: And the pizza place, what’s it called?
ME: Dominos.
CHOTINER: Right. And you can order from your laptop?
ME: Yeah. Well, I can also use my phone. Sometimes that’s quicker.
CHOTINER: And all the food in your fridge and pantry. When do you eat that?
ME: Now hang on a second,
ME: Dominos.
CHOTINER: Right. And you can order from your laptop?
ME: Yeah. Well, I can also use my phone. Sometimes that’s quicker.
CHOTINER: And all the food in your fridge and pantry. When do you eat that?
ME: Now hang on a second,
Did Bill Maher have her on the show? I’m almost afraid to look it up…
February 2, 2026 at 3:40 AM
Did Bill Maher have her on the show? I’m almost afraid to look it up…
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all paintings should be called Apple Family II
February 1, 2026 at 1:16 PM
all paintings should be called Apple Family II
Reposted by Dennis B. Hooper
I think if you had to auction not to have dinner with them it would go for more bsky.app/profile/mari...
Bari Weiss attended a fundraiser last night in NYC, attendee tells me. There was an auction item for dinner with her and wife Nellie Bowles. Several people cheered in approval, many others said after how gross it was. Bari shouted out “And you can make out with Nellie!” It ultimately sold for $55k.
February 1, 2026 at 8:46 PM
I think if you had to auction not to have dinner with them it would go for more bsky.app/profile/mari...
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February 1, 2026 at 11:17 PM
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What's amazing about this is that Trump genuinely could've become beloved and popular if he had instead just did nothing - continue all of Biden's policies and take credit for the economic "soft landing" already occurring Instead he went with tariffs and jackboots and everyone hates him!
After numerous artists said they would no longer perform there and ticket sales plummeted, Trump says he is closing the Kennedy Center for at least two years.
February 1, 2026 at 11:49 PM
What's amazing about this is that Trump genuinely could've become beloved and popular if he had instead just did nothing - continue all of Biden's policies and take credit for the economic "soft landing" already occurring Instead he went with tariffs and jackboots and everyone hates him!
Reposted by Dennis B. Hooper
Reposted by Dennis B. Hooper
![Simon Maloy @SimonMaloy
WAITER: fresh-ground pepper?
DAVID BROOKS: [to no one] THIS IS NORMAL. HE IS ASKING IF WE
WOULD LIKE PEPPER, A SPICE, ON
OUR FOOD](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:k5zurjvwdwxqwpvd4ggk3w76/bafkreibt2dxsddwke2x3swkjtrybiemnckogzsju3cmcsl5xrecm2nolra@jpeg)
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I think a $46 million opening for a $90 million movie is better than an $8 million opening for a $40 million movie, and yet
February 1, 2026 at 12:58 AM
I think a $46 million opening for a $90 million movie is better than an $8 million opening for a $40 million movie, and yet
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they won't rest until our kids are dead.
The surgeon general of Florida announced that ALL vaccine mandates in Florida will be ended.
February 1, 2026 at 7:19 PM
they won't rest until our kids are dead.
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Can I have your attention:
esnupi
esnupi
February 1, 2026 at 6:50 PM
Can I have your attention:
esnupi
esnupi
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thank you for the intrusive thought i needed to crappily photoshop
January 31, 2026 at 11:21 PM
thank you for the intrusive thought i needed to crappily photoshop
Reposted by Dennis B. Hooper
Reposted by Dennis B. Hooper
Sure libs can win in commie places like Fort Worth but what does real America think
February 1, 2026 at 4:53 AM
Sure libs can win in commie places like Fort Worth but what does real America think
Reposted by Dennis B. Hooper
you know what film rules when you use it in just the right light with just the right colors? kodak ektar. just scanned this negative. would you believe it is 35mm? it looks incredible.
February 1, 2026 at 4:57 AM
you know what film rules when you use it in just the right light with just the right colors? kodak ektar. just scanned this negative. would you believe it is 35mm? it looks incredible.
Reposted by Dennis B. Hooper
My 5 year old nephew explaining what Daft Punk is to my 5 year old daughter: "It's robot music! It's music that's made by robots!"
February 1, 2026 at 3:59 AM
My 5 year old nephew explaining what Daft Punk is to my 5 year old daughter: "It's robot music! It's music that's made by robots!"
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Woke 2 has claimed its first victim ahead of schedule
February 1, 2026 at 3:55 AM
Woke 2 has claimed its first victim ahead of schedule
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NGL this description of Bsky in Vulture cracked me up
January 31, 2026 at 2:02 PM
NGL this description of Bsky in Vulture cracked me up
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TURN IT UUUUP
January 31, 2026 at 4:06 PM
TURN IT UUUUP
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given that all these people have had, you know, at LEAST seven years to prepare a vigorous and well-argued defense for appearing in the epstein files, it’s remarkable how much flailing is happening in public
February 1, 2026 at 2:12 AM
given that all these people have had, you know, at LEAST seven years to prepare a vigorous and well-argued defense for appearing in the epstein files, it’s remarkable how much flailing is happening in public
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Wait, what the hell is this? Bullet holes in the front windshield, rear windshield blown out, tires blown out, still running with money in the cup holder? Did ICE or CBP murder someone and take the body? This is nuts.
Activists responding to reports of an ICE abduction in Minneapolis found an abandoned car with flat tires, riddled with bullet holes (1/30/26)
January 31, 2026 at 10:46 PM
Wait, what the hell is this? Bullet holes in the front windshield, rear windshield blown out, tires blown out, still running with money in the cup holder? Did ICE or CBP murder someone and take the body? This is nuts.
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January 31, 2026 at 5:37 PM
Reposted by Dennis B. Hooper
Holy crap. Minnesota police chief tracks down ICE agents in his car and de-arrests a woman who lives in his town.
"MPR News has learned that the police chief in the small southern Minnesota city of St. Peter intervened Thursday afternoon to prevent federal immigration agents from arresting a local resident" who had been observing federal agents. www.mprnews.org/story/2026/0...
St. Peter police chief intervenes, prevents federal agents from arresting resident
The police chief of St. Peter intervened to prevent federal agents from taking a local resident who was observing ICE enforcement actions into custody. It is believed to the first time local police in...
www.mprnews.org
January 31, 2026 at 4:00 PM
Holy crap. Minnesota police chief tracks down ICE agents in his car and de-arrests a woman who lives in his town.
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In 2017, six actresses told the LA Times that a prominent Hollywood director was sexually violent toward them.
They were talking about Brett Ratner, who stood next to Melania Trump to celebrate the premiere of Melania, his eponymous documentary about the First Lady.
They were talking about Brett Ratner, who stood next to Melania Trump to celebrate the premiere of Melania, his eponymous documentary about the First Lady.
What women said "Melania" director Brett Ratner did to them
The First Lady’s documentary premiere marks the return of a director accused of sexual violence by six actresses in 2017.
www.motherjones.com
January 31, 2026 at 9:00 PM
In 2017, six actresses told the LA Times that a prominent Hollywood director was sexually violent toward them.
They were talking about Brett Ratner, who stood next to Melania Trump to celebrate the premiere of Melania, his eponymous documentary about the First Lady.
They were talking about Brett Ratner, who stood next to Melania Trump to celebrate the premiere of Melania, his eponymous documentary about the First Lady.
Torn because I genuinely think my life is better and that I am less substantively stupid because of the internet and my access to Every Possible Smart Opinion and not just the ones fit for cable television, but my attention span is measurably worse and a battle I fight every day
January 31, 2026 at 9:43 PM
Torn because I genuinely think my life is better and that I am less substantively stupid because of the internet and my access to Every Possible Smart Opinion and not just the ones fit for cable television, but my attention span is measurably worse and a battle I fight every day