Craig Deeley
@craiguito.bsky.social
I do stand-up and post silly things. I also did a podcast https://www.podbean.com/pi/pbblog-zf537-286755
Who called them therapists and not baggage handlers
January 5, 2026 at 11:38 AM
Who called them therapists and not baggage handlers
“This is the best thing since sliced bread!”
- first person to use toilet paper
- first person to use toilet paper
January 3, 2026 at 10:39 AM
“This is the best thing since sliced bread!”
- first person to use toilet paper
- first person to use toilet paper
That’s the last time I do an online personality test. I came out as neurotic. Had to go back and change all my answers
January 3, 2026 at 10:32 AM
That’s the last time I do an online personality test. I came out as neurotic. Had to go back and change all my answers
With all the doom and gloom around, newsreaders ought to wear those glasses with eyeballs that pop out on springs for a bit of light relief
January 3, 2026 at 10:27 AM
With all the doom and gloom around, newsreaders ought to wear those glasses with eyeballs that pop out on springs for a bit of light relief
Don’t want to brag but I got dry January out of the way yesterday
January 2, 2026 at 12:38 PM
Don’t want to brag but I got dry January out of the way yesterday
I suppose the phrase ‘blink and you’ll miss it’ is literally true for Dozey Don
January 2, 2026 at 8:25 AM
I suppose the phrase ‘blink and you’ll miss it’ is literally true for Dozey Don
The inventor of sarcasm has died. His last words were, "Wow. Comfy bed"
January 2, 2026 at 8:18 AM
The inventor of sarcasm has died. His last words were, "Wow. Comfy bed"
“Go Downtown, see if I care”
- Petulant Clark
- Petulant Clark
December 30, 2025 at 9:43 AM
“Go Downtown, see if I care”
- Petulant Clark
- Petulant Clark
Reposted by Craig Deeley
Sarah Cooper is back. 👏
December 30, 2025 at 12:12 AM
Sarah Cooper is back. 👏
Reposted by Craig Deeley
What was Jesus in for?
Tommy Robinson says he found Jesus in prison. Churches disagree about how to respond
Tommy Robinson says he found Jesus in prison. Churches disagree about how to respond
C of E faces dilemma as far right claims Christianity to push agenda that often clashes with gospel message
www.theguardian.com
December 28, 2025 at 1:02 PM
What was Jesus in for?
One of my favourite pieces of music is Thomas Tallis' Spem in Alium, because it is aurally stunning, but also sounds like something you could order in a fancy restaurant
December 28, 2025 at 10:23 AM
One of my favourite pieces of music is Thomas Tallis' Spem in Alium, because it is aurally stunning, but also sounds like something you could order in a fancy restaurant
Reposted by Craig Deeley
Scooby Doo’s favourite pantomime.
December 27, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Scooby Doo’s favourite pantomime.
The problem with nougat is you’re never really sure if you’re eating some of the wrapper too
December 27, 2025 at 9:40 AM
The problem with nougat is you’re never really sure if you’re eating some of the wrapper too
"I couldn't eat another thing"
*eats all the other things*
*eats all the other things*
December 25, 2025 at 11:42 PM
"I couldn't eat another thing"
*eats all the other things*
*eats all the other things*
Reposted by Craig Deeley
Happy 7th anniversary of Piers Morgan blocking me on Twitter for saying that he was the bird lady in Home Alone 2.
December 25, 2025 at 8:39 AM
Happy 7th anniversary of Piers Morgan blocking me on Twitter for saying that he was the bird lady in Home Alone 2.
Once again this year instead of sending Christmas cards I’ll be making a donation. To Bargain Booze. In exchange for booze
December 24, 2025 at 10:07 AM
Once again this year instead of sending Christmas cards I’ll be making a donation. To Bargain Booze. In exchange for booze
BRIDE TO BE: Did you pick up the centrepiece like I asked?
GROOM: YES. I'M NOT AN IDIOT
*kicks box of centipedes under sofa*
GROOM: YES. I'M NOT AN IDIOT
*kicks box of centipedes under sofa*
December 22, 2025 at 8:04 PM
BRIDE TO BE: Did you pick up the centrepiece like I asked?
GROOM: YES. I'M NOT AN IDIOT
*kicks box of centipedes under sofa*
GROOM: YES. I'M NOT AN IDIOT
*kicks box of centipedes under sofa*
I’m one of those people who rushes round a petrol station on Christmas Eve to find last-minute presents. Luckily, my family all love petrol.
December 22, 2025 at 7:55 PM
I’m one of those people who rushes round a petrol station on Christmas Eve to find last-minute presents. Luckily, my family all love petrol.
Wine for breakfast, salty snacks all day, not knowing what day it is. And it's Christmas too!
December 22, 2025 at 7:32 PM
Wine for breakfast, salty snacks all day, not knowing what day it is. And it's Christmas too!
Reposted by Craig Deeley
Last-minute gig idea! A knock-off VHS that looks a bit like a classic Disney cartoon:
December 22, 2025 at 10:07 AM
Last-minute gig idea! A knock-off VHS that looks a bit like a classic Disney cartoon:
Reposted by Craig Deeley
My favourite Chris Rea song is the one about driving home for Christmas: The Road To Hell
December 3, 2025 at 9:06 AM
My favourite Chris Rea song is the one about driving home for Christmas: The Road To Hell
Reposted by Craig Deeley
What idiot called that little narc Elf on the Shelf and not Police Navidad?
November 15, 2023 at 9:55 PM
What idiot called that little narc Elf on the Shelf and not Police Navidad?