Nuclear Winter
@4slars.bsky.social
Ameri-strayan' from SF located Downunder. I also lived in the UK. She/her
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7lq6uxpoi7g7665lv3znvmbi/feed/aaaczlulk5zf6
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7lq6uxpoi7g7665lv3znvmbi/feed/aaaczlulk5zf6
Pinned
Nuclear Winter
@4slars.bsky.social
· Sep 15
Let me at least have a sip of arsenic before more unprecedented reveals.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
Before getting involved with someone, ask yourself: Is this a person I can visualize cropping out of pictures one day?
November 6, 2025 at 9:42 PM
Before getting involved with someone, ask yourself: Is this a person I can visualize cropping out of pictures one day?
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
no one asked for an extra hour of life. read the room.
November 2, 2025 at 5:40 PM
no one asked for an extra hour of life. read the room.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
movies used to start with the FBI threatening to send you to jail, but not anymore due to woke
November 3, 2025 at 4:34 AM
movies used to start with the FBI threatening to send you to jail, but not anymore due to woke
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
MY SISTER (looking at the full moon): wowww it’s so big! it’s like pulsating, do you see that?
ME: I think that’s your astigmatism
ME: I think that’s your astigmatism
November 6, 2025 at 7:47 PM
MY SISTER (looking at the full moon): wowww it’s so big! it’s like pulsating, do you see that?
ME: I think that’s your astigmatism
ME: I think that’s your astigmatism
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
so what if I want to become so successful I haunt everyone who has ever wronged me after they make it their life's goal to escape me? it's called ambition
November 7, 2025 at 2:38 AM
so what if I want to become so successful I haunt everyone who has ever wronged me after they make it their life's goal to escape me? it's called ambition
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
at my divorce hearing they said we could change our names to whatever we wanted but it had to be decided before we adjourned
your honor, you gotta give me a friggen heads up
your honor, you gotta give me a friggen heads up
November 7, 2025 at 3:38 AM
at my divorce hearing they said we could change our names to whatever we wanted but it had to be decided before we adjourned
your honor, you gotta give me a friggen heads up
your honor, you gotta give me a friggen heads up
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
I wish when it gets crazy crowded and backed up at check out, they’d get on the intercom and ask, “Do we have any former cashiers in the store?” Because I would fully take a crack at it.
October 30, 2025 at 9:34 PM
I wish when it gets crazy crowded and backed up at check out, they’d get on the intercom and ask, “Do we have any former cashiers in the store?” Because I would fully take a crack at it.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
For Halloween in college, I wore a long zippered bathrobe, cold cream, pink foam rollers and carried my roommate’s frying pan, which everyone put their cigarettes out in all night, don’t tell her.
November 2, 2025 at 5:38 PM
For Halloween in college, I wore a long zippered bathrobe, cold cream, pink foam rollers and carried my roommate’s frying pan, which everyone put their cigarettes out in all night, don’t tell her.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
In the comments, a person very accusatorially asked the poster why they would do that thing that way when the outcome could’ve been something else. And the poster took the time to respond, “Because it did not occur to me.” Which, like, yeah.
November 3, 2025 at 12:02 AM
In the comments, a person very accusatorially asked the poster why they would do that thing that way when the outcome could’ve been something else. And the poster took the time to respond, “Because it did not occur to me.” Which, like, yeah.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
my smart fridge just alerted me that in five billion years the sun will expand to the size of a red giant & incinerate the first three planets, including the earth, & also that i’m out of orange juice.
October 28, 2025 at 1:40 PM
my smart fridge just alerted me that in five billion years the sun will expand to the size of a red giant & incinerate the first three planets, including the earth, & also that i’m out of orange juice.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
my life coach: what’s standing in the way of your success & happiness?
me: {i show him a drawing i did of a dog with several rows of shark teeth}
me: {i show him a drawing i did of a dog with several rows of shark teeth}
October 28, 2025 at 4:14 PM
my life coach: what’s standing in the way of your success & happiness?
me: {i show him a drawing i did of a dog with several rows of shark teeth}
me: {i show him a drawing i did of a dog with several rows of shark teeth}
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
the two primary qualifications for being a squirrel is 90% belligerent drunk guy at a bar attitude & 10% top tier safe cracker who knows how to expertly break into a pine cone.
October 30, 2025 at 12:05 AM
the two primary qualifications for being a squirrel is 90% belligerent drunk guy at a bar attitude & 10% top tier safe cracker who knows how to expertly break into a pine cone.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
“this podcaster i listen to said that, actually, we’re all living in a simulation!” i shout to the horrified skydiving instructor as i free-fall through the air without a parachute.
October 31, 2025 at 8:13 PM
“this podcaster i listen to said that, actually, we’re all living in a simulation!” i shout to the horrified skydiving instructor as i free-fall through the air without a parachute.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
One reason growing up in the ‘80s and ‘90s was so wild was that we had the D.A.R.E. program and some of the lamest people to ever walk the earth telling us to not do drugs while some of the greatest musicians in recorded history sang us some of the best songs of all time about being on said drugs
July 26, 2025 at 5:46 AM
One reason growing up in the ‘80s and ‘90s was so wild was that we had the D.A.R.E. program and some of the lamest people to ever walk the earth telling us to not do drugs while some of the greatest musicians in recorded history sang us some of the best songs of all time about being on said drugs
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
Accidentally pushing a pull door at first is a completely understandable mistake. It’s that second, angrier push that tells the world who you really are
July 26, 2025 at 6:06 AM
Accidentally pushing a pull door at first is a completely understandable mistake. It’s that second, angrier push that tells the world who you really are
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
I read a NASA space screwdriver costs $35K and I just made one for, I'm guessing, 85 cents.
November 2, 2025 at 12:03 AM
I read a NASA space screwdriver costs $35K and I just made one for, I'm guessing, 85 cents.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
*slapping forehead* Oh, yeah... time moves forward and not backwards. I feel so silly.
In the comments, a person very accusatorially asked the poster why they would do that thing that way when the outcome could’ve been something else. And the poster took the time to respond, “Because it did not occur to me.” Which, like, yeah.
November 3, 2025 at 6:38 AM
*slapping forehead* Oh, yeah... time moves forward and not backwards. I feel so silly.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
When the police take you into custody call them "dirty coppers"! They'll find you adorable and might not smash your head too hard into the doorframe of their cruiser.
November 4, 2025 at 11:41 PM
When the police take you into custody call them "dirty coppers"! They'll find you adorable and might not smash your head too hard into the doorframe of their cruiser.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
The native Americans had never seen a European belt before but they still laughed at the pilgrims for buckling their hats.
November 5, 2025 at 2:19 PM
The native Americans had never seen a European belt before but they still laughed at the pilgrims for buckling their hats.
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
Should have never quit my job as a fence post in Nebraska
November 6, 2025 at 1:40 PM
Should have never quit my job as a fence post in Nebraska
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
Of course I don’t post selfies. Like normal people my age I grew up hating the way I looked
November 6, 2025 at 2:00 PM
Of course I don’t post selfies. Like normal people my age I grew up hating the way I looked
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
Someone on the old site once posted ‘have you ever owned a vinyl record?’ and instead of replying I withdrew to my horseless carriage and drove to the dry goods store to purchase a box of powdered milk
November 6, 2025 at 3:05 PM
Someone on the old site once posted ‘have you ever owned a vinyl record?’ and instead of replying I withdrew to my horseless carriage and drove to the dry goods store to purchase a box of powdered milk
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
Got my turkey in the microwave. Get on my level
November 6, 2025 at 11:49 PM
Got my turkey in the microwave. Get on my level
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
sometimes i miss the job i quit
and then i remember the time i asked my coworker to stop loudly arguing about whether ranch dressing was good or not and he sent me a very long email apologizing and explaining how he was trying to grow as a person and strengthen his relationship with Jesus
and then i remember the time i asked my coworker to stop loudly arguing about whether ranch dressing was good or not and he sent me a very long email apologizing and explaining how he was trying to grow as a person and strengthen his relationship with Jesus
November 5, 2025 at 11:50 PM
sometimes i miss the job i quit
and then i remember the time i asked my coworker to stop loudly arguing about whether ranch dressing was good or not and he sent me a very long email apologizing and explaining how he was trying to grow as a person and strengthen his relationship with Jesus
and then i remember the time i asked my coworker to stop loudly arguing about whether ranch dressing was good or not and he sent me a very long email apologizing and explaining how he was trying to grow as a person and strengthen his relationship with Jesus
Reposted by Nuclear Winter
This stained glass at the Sanctuary of St. Don Bosco in Brazil looks like a jeweled curtain of light.
November 5, 2025 at 12:49 PM
This stained glass at the Sanctuary of St. Don Bosco in Brazil looks like a jeweled curtain of light.