finally finished downloading my limewire wrapped after 20 years

My favorite part in the current hit video of United Healthcare CEO Brian Thompson being shot and killed is the witness standing there with a drink who runs away but is careful not to spill their drink, very relatable energy there

Hey Jude

You don’t have to put on the red light

Fucking. Ghouls.

this is like being an insane clown posse groupie for 20 years and then acting surprised to discover you’re hanging out with people in face paint

For example, they’ll see like, Kamala Harris say her pronouns & see right thru it like the performative bullshit it is, but even though they can identify that as manipulating a social issue for political points, they cant identify the larger cause because they already came into it hating trans ppl

she jerkin on my beetle till i juice… nah hmm. she TUGGIN on my beetle till i juice? no… she PULLIN on my beetle till i juice-

beetlejuice: hey u call?

me: well a state rep was groping her date at the musical about u &-

beetlejuice: GROSS! they made a musical about me? hope the guy came, at least

Speculated in a group chat last night that NYT would use the phrase “heavy petting” to describe the Boebert incident, but it turns out that wasn’t nearly prim enough. They went with “touching and carrying on.” www.nytimes.com/2023/09/16/u...

The closest parallel to Drew Barrymore being a scab is Matt Damon doing those Crypto commercials. You’re rich and beloved, all you have to do is not fuck it up by doing the dumbest thing anyone has ever heard of for absolutely no reason.

explaining to some teens on this boat that 'poop deck' is not funny it comes from the Latin word 'puppis' has backfired as they are now calling me Dr. PooPiss

based on the law where i live, i can be arrested for doing a poetry reading anywhere that isn’t exclusively 18+. i had to quit my job leading a local book club at a bookstore. i don’t think people realize how surreal things are becoming for trans people on the level of day-to-day life. crazy shit.

Worth noting that the reason Elon Musk bought twitter is because he had $10B in cash.
A wealth tax would have prevented this.

I think what I love most about cats is their quiet dignity

careful when you say "SMH"..... it means "Stalin, Mao, Hitler"

there were like 2 years when american internet culture was obsessed with bacon and at the time we thought that was as bad as it could get

Yep, turns out that Musk went off the deep end because one of his kids turned out to be trans. www.wsj.com/tech/elon-mu...