Richard Stone
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richardstone21.bsky.social
Richard Stone
@richardstone21.bsky.social
1.6K followers 1.1K following 160 posts
Ex financial programmer, economics, the 3Rs, humour and puns, walking, nature, music, photography, board games.
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richardstone21.bsky.social
Richard Stone @richardstone21.bsky.social · Nov 21
What did the policeman first say when he went over to Bluesky?

ELO ELO ELO.
Reposted by Richard Stone
maxharvey79.bsky.social
Elvis once proposed renting a German supermarket.

He wanted a Lidl lease conversation.

#LunchPun
March 20, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Reposted by Richard Stone
richardpulsford.bsky.social
I used to be a heavy smoker but since going on the diet I've become a lighter smoker

#LunchPun
March 20, 2025 at 12:00 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
I think I'm going to have a week off.
Aye, well, you better get the lozenges in then.

#LunchPun
March 20, 2025 at 12:12 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
I don't like eczema, per tickly.

#LunchPun
March 17, 2025 at 12:01 PM
Reposted by Richard Stone
berniebanter.bsky.social
‘Excuse me, Miss, do you know what’s best for getting red wine out of a carpet?’

‘Ammonia cleaner, Sir.’

‘Oh I’m sorry, I thought you worked here.’

#LunchPun
March 13, 2025 at 12:22 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
I was going to make a rude, tasteless joke about my neighbour's flooding garden but it's before the watershed.

#LunchPun
March 13, 2025 at 12:02 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
In the silly costume marathon I stuffed a load of insulation materials down my trousers and now I'm lagging behind.

#LunchPun
March 11, 2025 at 12:01 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
I've just seen the charge of the light brigade.
What, you mean the film?
No, I've just got a bill from my electricians.
March 9, 2025 at 7:48 AM
Reposted by Richard Stone
richardpulsford.bsky.social
Staff at the local store are not allowed to talk about my plans now I've taken it over as they've all signed a Londis closure agreement

#LunchPun
March 4, 2025 at 12:01 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
I'm afraid she couldn't turn back time, in any cher poor form.

#LunchPun
March 4, 2025 at 12:05 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
They say that plankton is good for you to eat - but that's not always the case is it?
No, indeed, you make a very soylent point.

#LunchPun
March 3, 2025 at 12:02 PM
Reposted by Richard Stone
bridiepowers.bsky.social
My sifter is coming apart, and no matter how hard I try, it never stays in my grasp. It’s quite a loose sieve.

#LunchPun
February 28, 2025 at 12:05 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
Someone thought they saw the Loch Ness monster in their lavatory - that's loo Nessie!

#LunchPun
February 28, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Reposted by Richard Stone
maxharvey79.bsky.social
I don't know how many teas I've made, to be brew tally honest.

#LunchPun
February 27, 2025 at 12:00 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
"Look Eeyore, I know what that bear is doing in the woods!" said Piglet, but Eeyore pooh pooed the idea.

#LunchPun
February 27, 2025 at 12:01 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
There's a new vampire film out today - I've just heard some sound bites.

#LunchPun
February 26, 2025 at 12:02 PM
Reposted by Richard Stone
rabc.bsky.social
I've started a new job today as a airport baggage handler, it isn't as easy as it sounds. There's a lot to take on board.
#lunchpun
February 25, 2025 at 12:00 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
I've decided to make another college slasher horror movie, in order to meet my die varsity targets.

#LunchPun
February 25, 2025 at 12:01 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
He tried to hide from the animals on the ark - to Noah veil.

#LunchPun
February 24, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Reposted by Richard Stone
mnsharpe.bsky.social
Novak Djokovic loves venison terrine on a bed of puréed potato. Game, set on mash.

#LunchPun
February 21, 2025 at 12:01 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
When our office cleaner failed to turn up one morning I was happy to step in and fill the vacuum.

#LunchPun
February 21, 2025 at 12:02 PM
Reposted by Richard Stone
eggforbread.bsky.social
If you open the window, all those bees will get in.

Swarm in here?

I'll open the window then.

#Lunchpun
February 20, 2025 at 12:01 PM
richardstone21.bsky.social
I went to the doctor with a stomach pain, and was told that I had swallowed a large flat fish, according to the x-ray.

#LunchPun
February 20, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Reposted by Richard Stone
richardpulsford.bsky.social
I go to Weightwatchers because I want control over my own density

#LunchPun
February 18, 2025 at 12:00 PM