Rachel Page
@rachelpagecomedy.bsky.social
I will make jokes. You have been warned.
Without downloading any new pics, describe your vibe for today using an image from your gallery
December 5, 2025 at 12:04 PM
Without downloading any new pics, describe your vibe for today using an image from your gallery
Reposted by Rachel Page
The BBC are accidentally running the subtitles to Mrs Marple over the Mercury Prize, and it’s rather wonderful. A few of lines could plausibly have been written by Jarvis.
October 16, 2025 at 8:58 PM
The BBC are accidentally running the subtitles to Mrs Marple over the Mercury Prize, and it’s rather wonderful. A few of lines could plausibly have been written by Jarvis.
Reposted by Rachel Page
🧵Spotted While Cafe Writing in Aotearoa New Zealand:
A man (60s?) carefully fixes a wobbly table before producing a newspaper and pen.
Moments later, his wife joins him.
Talking softly with heads bowed together as they do the crossword, laughing at each other's silly guesses. (1)
A man (60s?) carefully fixes a wobbly table before producing a newspaper and pen.
Moments later, his wife joins him.
Talking softly with heads bowed together as they do the crossword, laughing at each other's silly guesses. (1)
October 14, 2025 at 11:07 PM
🧵Spotted While Cafe Writing in Aotearoa New Zealand:
A man (60s?) carefully fixes a wobbly table before producing a newspaper and pen.
Moments later, his wife joins him.
Talking softly with heads bowed together as they do the crossword, laughing at each other's silly guesses. (1)
A man (60s?) carefully fixes a wobbly table before producing a newspaper and pen.
Moments later, his wife joins him.
Talking softly with heads bowed together as they do the crossword, laughing at each other's silly guesses. (1)
October 11, 2025 at 8:38 PM
Tom, that is too much cleavage for a funeral #CelebrityTraitors
October 9, 2025 at 9:02 PM
Tom, that is too much cleavage for a funeral #CelebrityTraitors
Excited to know nothing about what is going on in the world for a few weeks because my mind only has space for #CelebrityTraitors chat
October 8, 2025 at 10:13 PM
Excited to know nothing about what is going on in the world for a few weeks because my mind only has space for #CelebrityTraitors chat
Waiting for Eurostar and playing British or Parisian. It is pretty easy. The Parisians look chic and bored. The British have pints
September 26, 2025 at 8:05 AM
Waiting for Eurostar and playing British or Parisian. It is pretty easy. The Parisians look chic and bored. The British have pints
Arrived in London to find my mother is staging a coup at her local croquet club
September 25, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Arrived in London to find my mother is staging a coup at her local croquet club
What movie do you consider "perfect"?
September 21, 2025 at 8:00 AM
What movie do you consider "perfect"?
My shower broke, so I am having to wash in a bath. Anyone who does this on a regular basis is a psychopath.
Psychobath, if you will
Psychobath, if you will
September 19, 2025 at 7:45 AM
My shower broke, so I am having to wash in a bath. Anyone who does this on a regular basis is a psychopath.
Psychobath, if you will
Psychobath, if you will
Reposted by Rachel Page
not an exaggeration to say I am WEEPING with laughter at this reply from someone who hadn't seen that Robert Redford died today
September 16, 2025 at 12:53 PM
not an exaggeration to say I am WEEPING with laughter at this reply from someone who hadn't seen that Robert Redford died today
Reposted by Rachel Page
Happy 28th anniversary to the day my parents were rudely awakened by me complaining that there were no cartoons on because some Princess had died
August 31, 2025 at 9:01 AM
Happy 28th anniversary to the day my parents were rudely awakened by me complaining that there were no cartoons on because some Princess had died
Why don't they like me? 😭
Trump calls RFK Jr ‘three of four times a week’ with the same question
Trump calls RFK Jr ‘three or four times a week’ with the same question
www.independent.co.uk
August 6, 2025 at 7:08 AM
Why don't they like me? 😭
Reposted by Rachel Page
This is... Perfection. Truly.
August 1, 2025 at 12:59 PM
This is... Perfection. Truly.
My Spotify keeps suggesting Coldplay songs at the minute. Anyone know why?
July 20, 2025 at 10:09 AM
My Spotify keeps suggesting Coldplay songs at the minute. Anyone know why?
Happy Premium Bonds day to all that celebrate
July 2, 2025 at 8:46 AM
Happy Premium Bonds day to all that celebrate
My neighbour's dog absolutely loves their cat. The cat does not feel the same way. He keeps jumping the fence to avoid the dog... I am waiting for the day the dog follows
June 29, 2025 at 9:37 PM
My neighbour's dog absolutely loves their cat. The cat does not feel the same way. He keeps jumping the fence to avoid the dog... I am waiting for the day the dog follows
My Cousin Vinny walked, so Legally Blonde could run
June 20, 2025 at 8:33 PM
My Cousin Vinny walked, so Legally Blonde could run
I have been in London for three hours and I am yet to make eye contact with someone. Bliss
June 14, 2025 at 3:51 PM
I have been in London for three hours and I am yet to make eye contact with someone. Bliss
My partner paints warhammer while we watch TV, so I have to do this whenever anything interesting is on screen.
Horse!
Fight!
Tits!
Horse!
Fight!
Tits!
See it (a horse)
Say it ("horse!")
Sorted (everyone else now has the opportunity to behold the horse)
Say it ("horse!")
Sorted (everyone else now has the opportunity to behold the horse)
June 11, 2025 at 2:25 PM
My partner paints warhammer while we watch TV, so I have to do this whenever anything interesting is on screen.
Horse!
Fight!
Tits!
Horse!
Fight!
Tits!
I'm going to sleep now. If there aren't mad things for me to read tomorrow morning, I'm going to be furious
June 5, 2025 at 11:09 PM
I'm going to sleep now. If there aren't mad things for me to read tomorrow morning, I'm going to be furious
I avoided social media until I had watched Doctor Who, now I feel like I missed the boat on seeing people's opinions. Probably for the best
June 2, 2025 at 7:07 PM
I avoided social media until I had watched Doctor Who, now I feel like I missed the boat on seeing people's opinions. Probably for the best
You think you have grown up and then you find yourself being really pleased that your favourite pokemon has been deemed sound...
May 29, 2025 at 9:48 PM
You think you have grown up and then you find yourself being really pleased that your favourite pokemon has been deemed sound...
Finally watching Succession and doing it while eating leftover Easter egg. As nature intended.
May 29, 2025 at 7:45 PM
Finally watching Succession and doing it while eating leftover Easter egg. As nature intended.