peach
@peachy.bsky.social
getting people drunk for a living since ‘08. please don’t fall in love with me.
I just said “back off, bucko” out loud in the car because somebody was following me too close. my transformation into my mother is nearly complete.
August 2, 2025 at 12:38 AM
I just said “back off, bucko” out loud in the car because somebody was following me too close. my transformation into my mother is nearly complete.
I just experienced the Insane Clown Posse’s “Miracles” music video for the first time and oh my GOD
April 1, 2025 at 4:34 AM
I just experienced the Insane Clown Posse’s “Miracles” music video for the first time and oh my GOD
going to pennsylvania tomorrow. first stop: PIEROGI
March 27, 2025 at 5:02 AM
going to pennsylvania tomorrow. first stop: PIEROGI
me, at work: *busy as hell*
guy who just stared longingly into my eyes 2 minutes ago and asked, “how are you? 🥹”: *staring longingly into my eyes* how are you? 🥹
guy who just stared longingly into my eyes 2 minutes ago and asked, “how are you? 🥹”: *staring longingly into my eyes* how are you? 🥹
March 10, 2025 at 5:02 AM
me, at work: *busy as hell*
guy who just stared longingly into my eyes 2 minutes ago and asked, “how are you? 🥹”: *staring longingly into my eyes* how are you? 🥹
guy who just stared longingly into my eyes 2 minutes ago and asked, “how are you? 🥹”: *staring longingly into my eyes* how are you? 🥹
Reposted by peach
hey could everyone please boycott the costco down the street from me for about an hour starting in the next eleven minutes
March 8, 2025 at 3:20 PM
hey could everyone please boycott the costco down the street from me for about an hour starting in the next eleven minutes
tonight this woman ordered a 7&7 and then was like “is it well? I wanted well” uh, no, it’s Seagram’s 7. That’s one of the 7’s in a 7&7. literally what the fuck. I’m still mad about this hours later lmao
March 8, 2025 at 7:48 AM
tonight this woman ordered a 7&7 and then was like “is it well? I wanted well” uh, no, it’s Seagram’s 7. That’s one of the 7’s in a 7&7. literally what the fuck. I’m still mad about this hours later lmao
Reposted by peach
*discovery of potatoes*
1st person: What should we do with these?
2nd person: *clenches fist* EVERYTHING.
1st person: What should we do with these?
2nd person: *clenches fist* EVERYTHING.
January 5, 2025 at 10:19 AM
*discovery of potatoes*
1st person: What should we do with these?
2nd person: *clenches fist* EVERYTHING.
1st person: What should we do with these?
2nd person: *clenches fist* EVERYTHING.
Reposted by peach
Whenever I play anything against my sister I always start with, "You seem a decent fellow, I hate to kill you," and she always responds, "You seem a decent fellow, I hate to die." That's family.
March 7, 2025 at 7:23 AM
Whenever I play anything against my sister I always start with, "You seem a decent fellow, I hate to kill you," and she always responds, "You seem a decent fellow, I hate to die." That's family.
Reposted by peach
I WILL cry!
“you’ll cry if what?”
no I just will
“you’ll cry if what?”
no I just will
November 14, 2024 at 7:28 PM
I WILL cry!
“you’ll cry if what?”
no I just will
“you’ll cry if what?”
no I just will
Reposted by peach
I’m always thinking of grocery list items when I’m in the shower, so
November 20, 2024 at 7:16 PM
I’m always thinking of grocery list items when I’m in the shower, so
Reposted by peach
ME: do you even understand what lent is?
THEM: i give up
ME: oh so you get it
THEM: i give up
ME: oh so you get it
March 7, 2025 at 5:38 AM
ME: do you even understand what lent is?
THEM: i give up
ME: oh so you get it
THEM: i give up
ME: oh so you get it
I had a dream last night Luigi was HERE and I was like “omg you need a candle” but I had given all the perfect ones away and only had the fucked up one left 😭😭
March 7, 2025 at 5:40 AM
I had a dream last night Luigi was HERE and I was like “omg you need a candle” but I had given all the perfect ones away and only had the fucked up one left 😭😭
Reposted by peach
omg look what my new comrade @peachy.bsky.social sent me!!
💀😍😍😍
💀😍😍😍
February 25, 2025 at 3:44 AM
omg look what my new comrade @peachy.bsky.social sent me!!
💀😍😍😍
💀😍😍😍
I love my 30’s! my friend BAKED ME A LOAF OF HOMEMADE BREAD FOR MY BIRTHDAY. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!!!
February 19, 2025 at 6:49 AM
I love my 30’s! my friend BAKED ME A LOAF OF HOMEMADE BREAD FOR MY BIRTHDAY. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!!!
My favorite part of bartending is when I’m in the middle of doing something and somebody calls me over so I can watch them and their friends decide what they want to drink
February 16, 2025 at 10:44 PM
My favorite part of bartending is when I’m in the middle of doing something and somebody calls me over so I can watch them and their friends decide what they want to drink
Reposted by peach
This post is only for bartenders in Arizona who made a whole random online group of people feel like family during the pandemic: *raises eyebrows seductively* hey Paige
February 15, 2025 at 8:23 AM
This post is only for bartenders in Arizona who made a whole random online group of people feel like family during the pandemic: *raises eyebrows seductively* hey Paige
Reposted by peach
I don't want AI. I want a microwave that never beeps
February 13, 2025 at 4:51 PM
I don't want AI. I want a microwave that never beeps
Reposted by peach
Can’t even throw eggs at Eric Adams like he deserves because they’re too expensive now
February 14, 2025 at 12:46 AM
Can’t even throw eggs at Eric Adams like he deserves because they’re too expensive now
Has anybody considered that Trump brought back freedom and a lot of pilots just 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 crashing planes, and now they finally can?
February 13, 2025 at 8:36 PM
Has anybody considered that Trump brought back freedom and a lot of pilots just 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 crashing planes, and now they finally can?
are we trying to break a plane crash record or something because what the heck
February 7, 2025 at 2:38 PM
are we trying to break a plane crash record or something because what the heck
eating candy on my way to a spin class didn’t enhance my performance
?????
?????
February 5, 2025 at 2:16 AM
eating candy on my way to a spin class didn’t enhance my performance
?????
?????
just saw a post from an insane party girl friend where she wrote “very much in my self-improvement era” and I’m dying to reply “so are you gonna stop drinking and driving every night? 🤗”
February 4, 2025 at 3:27 PM
just saw a post from an insane party girl friend where she wrote “very much in my self-improvement era” and I’m dying to reply “so are you gonna stop drinking and driving every night? 🤗”
the most offensive thing to me about this fit is the flip flop heels
February 4, 2025 at 7:36 AM
the most offensive thing to me about this fit is the flip flop heels
Reposted by peach
Seems like not sinning would be pretty disrespectful considering Jesus died so we could.
February 1, 2025 at 5:26 AM
Seems like not sinning would be pretty disrespectful considering Jesus died so we could.