Matt / parrais
@parrais.co.uk
Nerd alert! #parkrun #dcfcfans #pcgaming #fortnite #startrek #mcu #wirral he/him
Reposted by Matt / parrais
![Comic. [Top panel: Long-necked dinosaur with red X over it.] [Bottom panel: two smaller dinosaurs the same shape except their neck isn’t long, while in the background there’s an extremely long neck criss-crossing the frame like a snake. Green check mark in center.] [caption] Thanks to modern paleontological reconstructions, we now know that most sauropods had short necks, and all those extra vertebrae belonged to the sauropod colony’s queen.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:cz73r7iyiqn26upot4jtjdhk/bafkreigjcepbb3hjlvpjzmj6msuydmem6gdakkl5svr4kh4q7qi3c4m2fu@jpeg)
December 29, 2025 at 9:11 PM
Ultraviolet: British 6-part drama with Jack Davenport and Idris Elba as part of an organisation of vampire hunters. A 'believable' (as much as anything can be) modern take on vampire mythology.
Everyone has a 1-2 season TV show they sorely miss and not enough people knew about that you are always praising the heavens about.
What's yours?
What's yours?
September 14, 2025 at 11:42 AM
Ultraviolet: British 6-part drama with Jack Davenport and Idris Elba as part of an organisation of vampire hunters. A 'believable' (as much as anything can be) modern take on vampire mythology.
'Men in Black' by Will Smith (which I'm pretty sure was the first MP3 I downloaded... over dialup 😬)
August 12, 2025 at 12:02 AM
'Men in Black' by Will Smith (which I'm pretty sure was the first MP3 I downloaded... over dialup 😬)
Reposted by Matt / parrais
What I don't get is why it's left to the Lib-Dems to point this out?
August 11, 2025 at 9:27 AM
What I don't get is why it's left to the Lib-Dems to point this out?
Reposted by Matt / parrais
Reposted by Matt / parrais
July 24, 2025 at 2:33 PM
Reposted by Matt / parrais
Computers used to scream every time they connected to the Internet. They knew. They tried to warn us. We did not listen.
June 22, 2025 at 10:15 PM
Computers used to scream every time they connected to the Internet. They knew. They tried to warn us. We did not listen.
Reposted by Matt / parrais
I’m convinced this is how a bay leaf would talk
![Cartoon by Stephen Collins for the Guardian, here's the script:
[Scene is the inside of a SOUP. Some CARROTS and BITS OF BROCCOLI are floating around and a STOCK CUBE and a BAY LEAF have just been dropped in.]
1
STOCK CUBE:
Alright lads - this is Bay Leaf.
My colleague from the spice rack.
2
BROCCOLI:
Hi Bay Leaf
BAY LEAF:
Yuh yuh hi
3
CARROTS:
You up for getting proper blended with us later, Bay Leaf?
BAY LEAF:
Nuh mate, getting scooped out before soup stage.
4
CARROTS:
Oh! So… you’re not being eaten then?
BAY LEAF:
Eaten! Haha
5
BAY LEAF:
Not allowed mate.
I’m afraid I’m a lil’ bit *toooo intense*...
6
BAY LEAF:
Just here for the flavour hit.
Special forces, y’know.
That’s why there’s just one of me.
7
BAY LEAF:
Over-deploy and you’d have this whole soup stiiinking of bay leaf…
8
BAY LEAF:
You might wanna stand back actually.
This place is about to get preeetty bay leafy...
9
[Silent pause]
10
CARROTS:
Are you doing something
BAY LEAF:
Sure am mate.
11
BAY LEAF:
Suuuuure am.
12
BAY LEAF [Getting scooped out by chef’s spoon]:
You need training to perceive it.
CARROTS:
OK](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:4m3we4apbjayclzcnhwe3pfp/bafkreibguu2d74i7v7yrkx2z5vsiluhrnkp2uayri2gmcm4gpl4d3dvlgq@jpeg)
June 17, 2025 at 4:02 PM
I’m convinced this is how a bay leaf would talk
Reposted by Matt / parrais
This is a brand new letter by “Not in Our Name - Women”, a collective group of cisgender women who support the transgender community and object to the false divide between women’s rights and transgender rights.
If you’re a cis woman you can sign your support here ⤵️
If you’re a cis woman you can sign your support here ⤵️
Sign the Petition
Not in our name: Women in support of the trans+ community
www.change.org
May 27, 2025 at 11:15 AM
This is a brand new letter by “Not in Our Name - Women”, a collective group of cisgender women who support the transgender community and object to the false divide between women’s rights and transgender rights.
If you’re a cis woman you can sign your support here ⤵️
If you’re a cis woman you can sign your support here ⤵️
Reposted by Matt / parrais
The UK is a lost cause since Brexit. Similarly to the US, there is now a large, incompressible segment of illiterate morons who will actively seek the most outrageous clown to vote for - disregarding even their own selfish interest as long as they are flattered and entertained.
May 25, 2025 at 11:39 AM
The UK is a lost cause since Brexit. Similarly to the US, there is now a large, incompressible segment of illiterate morons who will actively seek the most outrageous clown to vote for - disregarding even their own selfish interest as long as they are flattered and entertained.
Reposted by Matt / parrais
Every Harry Potter book or shirt you buy directly funds the persecution of trans people.
There's absolutely no excuse to support anything Harry Potter anymore unless you hate trans people.
There's absolutely no excuse to support anything Harry Potter anymore unless you hate trans people.
May 24, 2025 at 12:53 PM
Every Harry Potter book or shirt you buy directly funds the persecution of trans people.
There's absolutely no excuse to support anything Harry Potter anymore unless you hate trans people.
There's absolutely no excuse to support anything Harry Potter anymore unless you hate trans people.
Reposted by Matt / parrais
Please repost if you want the full restoration of our EU Freedom of Movement, which was stolen from us by the worst abuses of democracy in modern British history, and was the worst curtailment of our liberty in 200 years.
May 19, 2025 at 12:07 PM
Please repost if you want the full restoration of our EU Freedom of Movement, which was stolen from us by the worst abuses of democracy in modern British history, and was the worst curtailment of our liberty in 200 years.
Reposted by Matt / parrais
<diligently updating the list of career paths on the university’s “Major in Mathematics!” poster>
May 8, 2025 at 8:06 PM
<diligently updating the list of career paths on the university’s “Major in Mathematics!” poster>
Show your age!
What was number one the day you were born and day you turned 18
Kate Bush - Wuthering Heights
Take That - How Deep Is Your Love
What was number one the day you were born and day you turned 18
Kate Bush - Wuthering Heights
Take That - How Deep Is Your Love
May 8, 2025 at 4:25 PM
Show your age!
What was number one the day you were born and day you turned 18
Kate Bush - Wuthering Heights
Take That - How Deep Is Your Love
What was number one the day you were born and day you turned 18
Kate Bush - Wuthering Heights
Take That - How Deep Is Your Love
Reposted by Matt / parrais
This is who “gender-critical” activists are…
April 27, 2025 at 5:53 AM
This is who “gender-critical” activists are…
'Shine' by Take That. Forever condemned to be a Morrisons supermarket jingle in my mind.
Fuck your favourite song. Tell me your least favourite song. The one that makes you die inside the moment you hear the first 3 seconds.
March 29, 2025 at 10:54 PM
'Shine' by Take That. Forever condemned to be a Morrisons supermarket jingle in my mind.
Age yourself with a film you saw in the theatres as a kid...
February 9, 2025 at 11:38 PM
Age yourself with a film you saw in the theatres as a kid...
First time running the challenging B-course at Delamere #parkrun - twice up and down Old Pale Hill for a total of 170m of elevation! As far as I know, the only UK parkruns with more climbing are Durlston and Whinlatter.
I got nowhere near my PB of course, but was pleased to get inside 26 minutes.
I got nowhere near my PB of course, but was pleased to get inside 26 minutes.
February 8, 2025 at 2:44 PM
First time running the challenging B-course at Delamere #parkrun - twice up and down Old Pale Hill for a total of 170m of elevation! As far as I know, the only UK parkruns with more climbing are Durlston and Whinlatter.
I got nowhere near my PB of course, but was pleased to get inside 26 minutes.
I got nowhere near my PB of course, but was pleased to get inside 26 minutes.
My nearest FORTY-SIX #parkrun events were all cancelled today (according to the 5K app) so a rare Saturday lie-in for me.
Hopefully the weather will be better next week! ❄️
Hopefully the weather will be better next week! ❄️
January 11, 2025 at 12:17 PM
My nearest FORTY-SIX #parkrun events were all cancelled today (according to the 5K app) so a rare Saturday lie-in for me.
Hopefully the weather will be better next week! ❄️
Hopefully the weather will be better next week! ❄️
You've been kidnapped. The characters of the last TV show you watched are coming to save you.
Very happy with what my wife put on the TV earlier, particularly if my kidnappers are supernatural!
Very happy with what my wife put on the TV earlier, particularly if my kidnappers are supernatural!
January 5, 2025 at 6:56 PM
You've been kidnapped. The characters of the last TV show you watched are coming to save you.
Very happy with what my wife put on the TV earlier, particularly if my kidnappers are supernatural!
Very happy with what my wife put on the TV earlier, particularly if my kidnappers are supernatural!
#HappyNewYear everyone, I hope 2025 treats you well.
January 1, 2025 at 12:04 AM
#HappyNewYear everyone, I hope 2025 treats you well.
Very pleased to complete my 100th #parkrun this morning (and my 52nd of 2024) after doing my first in January last year. Coincidentally, I got finish token #100!
I was 'touring' at Markeaton Park in Derby (my old home town) due to visiting family for Christmas.
#loveparkrun
I was 'touring' at Markeaton Park in Derby (my old home town) due to visiting family for Christmas.
#loveparkrun
December 28, 2024 at 5:29 PM
Very pleased to complete my 100th #parkrun this morning (and my 52nd of 2024) after doing my first in January last year. Coincidentally, I got finish token #100!
I was 'touring' at Markeaton Park in Derby (my old home town) due to visiting family for Christmas.
#loveparkrun
I was 'touring' at Markeaton Park in Derby (my old home town) due to visiting family for Christmas.
#loveparkrun