Johnson
@moarhops.bsky.social
Unretired keg farmer, Piper's Pub forever
Me after working the 4th Saturday in a row full of obnoxious out of town sports bros:
lol last night was a rerun
“NBC's Seth Meyers is suffering from an incurable case of Trump Derangement Syndrome (TDS). He was viewed last night in an uncontrollable rage…”
November 16, 2025 at 12:59 PM
Me after working the 4th Saturday in a row full of obnoxious out of town sports bros:
@adef187.bsky.social one for your scrapbook
November 16, 2025 at 12:58 AM
@adef187.bsky.social one for your scrapbook
November 15, first *Paddy of the season, gonna be a great Irish Christmas this year
November 15, 2025 at 6:12 AM
November 15, first *Paddy of the season, gonna be a great Irish Christmas this year
I think we've hit the crossover, the exact moment when "Simpsons predicted it" becomes "South Park predicted it"
November 15, 2025 at 4:52 AM
I think we've hit the crossover, the exact moment when "Simpsons predicted it" becomes "South Park predicted it"
A tremendous day to be an enjoyer of memes, I'll tell you hwat
November 15, 2025 at 3:52 AM
A tremendous day to be an enjoyer of memes, I'll tell you hwat
Reposted by Johnson
Today is just like yesterday, except now your daily bullshit happens in a world in which several U.S. Presidents have apparently excanged fluids.
Thanks for enjoying [violent retching]
Thanks for enjoying [violent retching]
November 15, 2025 at 12:35 AM
Today is just like yesterday, except now your daily bullshit happens in a world in which several U.S. Presidents have apparently excanged fluids.
Thanks for enjoying [violent retching]
Thanks for enjoying [violent retching]
Reposted by Johnson
True comedy is watching Dave Portnay trying to use a hammer
November 14, 2025 at 5:42 AM
True comedy is watching Dave Portnay trying to use a hammer
Reposted by Johnson
why are there so many
posts about emails
posts about emails
November 13, 2025 at 4:56 AM
why are there so many
posts about emails
posts about emails
The absolute horse fuckery of using AI to generate this sack of pig shit for an IG story. Get in the fuckin Mon, I don't care how good your burrata is.
November 13, 2025 at 4:40 AM
The absolute horse fuckery of using AI to generate this sack of pig shit for an IG story. Get in the fuckin Mon, I don't care how good your burrata is.
"everything I don't like is AI" #CookQuotes
November 10, 2025 at 6:20 PM
"everything I don't like is AI" #CookQuotes
Exhausted all the David Attenborough nature films for my boy and put on Grizzly Man now we're all having Werner Herzog sized Sunday scaries
November 10, 2025 at 5:49 AM
Exhausted all the David Attenborough nature films for my boy and put on Grizzly Man now we're all having Werner Herzog sized Sunday scaries
"Billy Strings is just bluegrass Rush for millennials" #CookQuotes
November 8, 2025 at 4:23 PM
"Billy Strings is just bluegrass Rush for millennials" #CookQuotes
The little bunny that decided to borrow down in the shrub next to where the dogs poop needs to sort its fucking life out
November 8, 2025 at 5:14 AM
The little bunny that decided to borrow down in the shrub next to where the dogs poop needs to sort its fucking life out
Reposted by Johnson
My wife, shit-faced, insisting on staying up for the end of the movie...which she won't remember.
November 7, 2025 at 7:43 PM
My wife, shit-faced, insisting on staying up for the end of the movie...which she won't remember.
Reposted by Johnson
get it right
November 7, 2025 at 7:33 PM
get it right
Reposted by Johnson
"did you even read the article???? the headline is bad but the article is good!!!" buddy if I see a restaurant called Dan's Fecal Stew i am not gonna go in there to see if maybe they printed the sign wrong
September 5, 2025 at 12:51 AM
"did you even read the article???? the headline is bad but the article is good!!!" buddy if I see a restaurant called Dan's Fecal Stew i am not gonna go in there to see if maybe they printed the sign wrong
The dogs were very good today, please clap
November 6, 2025 at 4:25 AM
The dogs were very good today, please clap
Reposted by Johnson
"it's not my girlfriend's weed, it's my bae leaf" #CookQuotes
November 5, 2025 at 5:23 PM
"it's not my girlfriend's weed, it's my bae leaf" #CookQuotes
Reposted by Johnson
I've found a new favorite picture of my beautiful boy and it's the best picture of a dog you could imagine so please be kind to my boys many many flaps of destiny
November 4, 2025 at 3:37 AM
I've found a new favorite picture of my beautiful boy and it's the best picture of a dog you could imagine so please be kind to my boys many many flaps of destiny
Reposted by Johnson
It's not in this article but the government asserts that the sandwich was thrown at "point blank range", which implies subway sandwiches have defined effective weapon ranges of varying lethality, and I would like to see the government's chart of these ranges.
Trial Begins for Man Accused of Lobbing a Sandwich at a Federal Agent www.nytimes.com/2025/11/03/u...
Trial Begins for Man Accused of Lobbing a Sandwich at a Federal Agent
www.nytimes.com
November 3, 2025 at 9:14 PM
It's not in this article but the government asserts that the sandwich was thrown at "point blank range", which implies subway sandwiches have defined effective weapon ranges of varying lethality, and I would like to see the government's chart of these ranges.
"ironically, the burn spray burns when you huff it" #CookQuotes
November 2, 2025 at 9:47 PM
"ironically, the burn spray burns when you huff it" #CookQuotes
"isn't that just gassing up your ding dong?
"I gas my ding dong up all the time, C'MON LITTLE BUDDY, YOU CAN DO THIS!"
#CookQuotes
"I gas my ding dong up all the time, C'MON LITTLE BUDDY, YOU CAN DO THIS!"
#CookQuotes
November 2, 2025 at 6:10 PM
"isn't that just gassing up your ding dong?
"I gas my ding dong up all the time, C'MON LITTLE BUDDY, YOU CAN DO THIS!"
#CookQuotes
"I gas my ding dong up all the time, C'MON LITTLE BUDDY, YOU CAN DO THIS!"
#CookQuotes
Reposted by Johnson
I actually now believe that the Pirates will play in a World Series in my lifetime. It will be right before a long-running, terminal illness takes me, and they will lose in a way that is somehow worse than what the Blue Jays just did
November 2, 2025 at 4:21 AM
I actually now believe that the Pirates will play in a World Series in my lifetime. It will be right before a long-running, terminal illness takes me, and they will lose in a way that is somehow worse than what the Blue Jays just did