These are my penitential Jorts
@jortsprime.bsky.social
Evangelical-Episcopalian husband-dad. Michigander. Lapsed geologist. High-functioning autistic dude. Fan of denim-based shorts and Tolkien and dinosaurs and board games.
Eucharistic Prayer C appreciator
🌎🏝️🏠💯
Eucharistic Prayer C appreciator
🌎🏝️🏠💯
Pinned
Really a Eucharistic Prayer C kind of a day.
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
God, what have you done?
There’s a Woke Marxist Pope
And he cheers on the gays
Oh mama, I'm just having fun
On the stage in my robes
It's where I belong down with the
Woke Marxist Pope
I’m gonna keep on praying with the
Woke Marxist Pope
I’m gonna keep on praying down in
St. Peter’s Square
There’s a Woke Marxist Pope
And he cheers on the gays
Oh mama, I'm just having fun
On the stage in my robes
It's where I belong down with the
Woke Marxist Pope
I’m gonna keep on praying with the
Woke Marxist Pope
I’m gonna keep on praying down in
St. Peter’s Square
June 14, 2025 at 7:06 PM
God, what have you done?
There’s a Woke Marxist Pope
And he cheers on the gays
Oh mama, I'm just having fun
On the stage in my robes
It's where I belong down with the
Woke Marxist Pope
I’m gonna keep on praying with the
Woke Marxist Pope
I’m gonna keep on praying down in
St. Peter’s Square
There’s a Woke Marxist Pope
And he cheers on the gays
Oh mama, I'm just having fun
On the stage in my robes
It's where I belong down with the
Woke Marxist Pope
I’m gonna keep on praying with the
Woke Marxist Pope
I’m gonna keep on praying down in
St. Peter’s Square
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
I cannot stress enough that it is possible to govern well, and to do so in a manner that is broadly accretive.
New Mexico made childcare free. It lifted 120,000 people above the poverty line
The state, which has long ranked worst in the US for child wellbeing, became the first and only in the country to offer free childcare to a majority of families
www.theguardian.com
April 12, 2025 at 1:51 AM
I cannot stress enough that it is possible to govern well, and to do so in a manner that is broadly accretive.
Eucharistic Prayer C is the best of the Eucharistic prayers. Ol Tommy Cranmer did good work there.
April 12, 2025 at 1:28 AM
Eucharistic Prayer C is the best of the Eucharistic prayers. Ol Tommy Cranmer did good work there.
I love playing games with my wife
April 12, 2025 at 1:12 AM
I love playing games with my wife
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
Today’s essay by D.N. Keane is the next installment in our hymns series.
earthandaltarmag.com/posts/lo-he-...
earthandaltarmag.com/posts/lo-he-...
“LO, HE COMES” — IS VERSE 2 PROBLEMATIC — Earth and Altar
It wouldn’t be Advent for me without Charles Wesley’s hymn “Lo, He Comes with Clouds Descending” sung to the glorious tune Helmsley. While many assume Advent is simply preparation for Christmas, the f...
earthandaltarmag.com
April 11, 2025 at 8:51 PM
Today’s essay by D.N. Keane is the next installment in our hymns series.
earthandaltarmag.com/posts/lo-he-...
earthandaltarmag.com/posts/lo-he-...
Colossal is going to take a perfectly good elephant, give it anxiety and a bad perm, and say they've brought back mammoths, aren't they.
April 10, 2025 at 1:17 AM
Colossal is going to take a perfectly good elephant, give it anxiety and a bad perm, and say they've brought back mammoths, aren't they.
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
Woke business plot? Woke business plot. Woke business plot!
Im gonna laugh like Walter White in the crawl space.
April 9, 2025 at 4:12 PM
Woke business plot? Woke business plot. Woke business plot!
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
happy confederate surrender day to all
April 9, 2025 at 12:56 PM
happy confederate surrender day to all
"Lil' Jorts being able to hear is a blessing" I remind myself as a Nazgûl screech tells me my fourth attempt in as many minutes to load the dishwasher has been detected.
April 9, 2025 at 12:23 AM
"Lil' Jorts being able to hear is a blessing" I remind myself as a Nazgûl screech tells me my fourth attempt in as many minutes to load the dishwasher has been detected.
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
152% tax rate against billionaires at home and B-52 bombers against authoritarians abroad
April 8, 2025 at 11:49 PM
152% tax rate against billionaires at home and B-52 bombers against authoritarians abroad
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
UPDATE: ICE is wildly unconcerned about where this man is and no one will tell me, his registered attorney. The universal answer so far is "let's wait and see where he ends up." This is deeply off.
We would have more rights at this point if UPS had lost a pair of shoes I'd just bought from Zappos
We would have more rights at this point if UPS had lost a pair of shoes I'd just bought from Zappos
My detained client was scheduled for a bond hearing this AM in a MA immigration court. He wasn't brought in, and he and his case have disappeared.
I then received this notice of activity on a nonexistent docket in which his name was changed to "N/A"
It's all happening a lot faster than I expected
I then received this notice of activity on a nonexistent docket in which his name was changed to "N/A"
It's all happening a lot faster than I expected
April 8, 2025 at 10:41 PM
UPDATE: ICE is wildly unconcerned about where this man is and no one will tell me, his registered attorney. The universal answer so far is "let's wait and see where he ends up." This is deeply off.
We would have more rights at this point if UPS had lost a pair of shoes I'd just bought from Zappos
We would have more rights at this point if UPS had lost a pair of shoes I'd just bought from Zappos
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
Setting aside the absurdity here, taking money from foreigners to state a political opinion is completely legal! Ms. Rachel is not a candidate for office (425 EVs easy)
Gonna go out on a limb here and say sending Ms Rachel to Guantanamo will do the exact opposite of stopping antisemitism.
April 8, 2025 at 4:56 PM
Setting aside the absurdity here, taking money from foreigners to state a political opinion is completely legal! Ms. Rachel is not a candidate for office (425 EVs easy)
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
1 Hear my voice, O God, when I complain; *
protect my life from fear of the enemy.
2 Hide me from the conspiracy of the wicked, *
from the mob of evildoers.
3 They sharpen their tongue like a sword, *
and aim their bitter words like arrows,
protect my life from fear of the enemy.
2 Hide me from the conspiracy of the wicked, *
from the mob of evildoers.
3 They sharpen their tongue like a sword, *
and aim their bitter words like arrows,
April 7, 2025 at 11:40 PM
1 Hear my voice, O God, when I complain; *
protect my life from fear of the enemy.
2 Hide me from the conspiracy of the wicked, *
from the mob of evildoers.
3 They sharpen their tongue like a sword, *
and aim their bitter words like arrows,
protect my life from fear of the enemy.
2 Hide me from the conspiracy of the wicked, *
from the mob of evildoers.
3 They sharpen their tongue like a sword, *
and aim their bitter words like arrows,
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
especially in times of war, or of national anxiety, or of disaster
April 7, 2025 at 7:20 PM
especially in times of war, or of national anxiety, or of disaster
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
save me, thing of 65 reese's peanut butter eggs from costco
April 7, 2025 at 4:34 PM
save me, thing of 65 reese's peanut butter eggs from costco
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
Long quote 🧵
"Geologists communicated in English; and they could name things in a manner that sent shivers through the bones. They had roof pendants in their discordant batholiths, mosaic conglomerates in desert pavement. There was ultrabasic, deep-ocean, mottled green-and-black rock—or serpentine.
"Geologists communicated in English; and they could name things in a manner that sent shivers through the bones. They had roof pendants in their discordant batholiths, mosaic conglomerates in desert pavement. There was ultrabasic, deep-ocean, mottled green-and-black rock—or serpentine.
geology has the best words
“the craton”
“dripping lithosphere”
“subducting slab”
incredible work all around
“the craton”
“dripping lithosphere”
“subducting slab”
incredible work all around
Today in everything is a metaphor, geoscientists have discovered that the craton, the enormous stable rock that forms the core of North America, is eroding away www.jsg.utexas.edu/news/2025/04...
April 5, 2025 at 6:11 PM
Long quote 🧵
"Geologists communicated in English; and they could name things in a manner that sent shivers through the bones. They had roof pendants in their discordant batholiths, mosaic conglomerates in desert pavement. There was ultrabasic, deep-ocean, mottled green-and-black rock—or serpentine.
"Geologists communicated in English; and they could name things in a manner that sent shivers through the bones. They had roof pendants in their discordant batholiths, mosaic conglomerates in desert pavement. There was ultrabasic, deep-ocean, mottled green-and-black rock—or serpentine.
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
something that stuck with me during Booker's marathon speech: most Dems used the questions sent his way to talk about real people affected by cuts, talk about Trump and Musk, or otherwise be relatable. Schumer's was focused on the GOP maybe going around the Senate parliamentarian on tax cuts
April 2, 2025 at 5:47 PM
something that stuck with me during Booker's marathon speech: most Dems used the questions sent his way to talk about real people affected by cuts, talk about Trump and Musk, or otherwise be relatable. Schumer's was focused on the GOP maybe going around the Senate parliamentarian on tax cuts
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
Reposted by These are my penitential Jorts
gavin newsom digging up strom rn to get him on the podcast
April 1, 2025 at 11:44 PM
gavin newsom digging up strom rn to get him on the podcast
This is everything I have ever wanted from government.
(Somewhere around hour 26)
Senator Booker: "Now, in closing..."
Republicans: *sit up straighter*
Booker: "I'd like to finish with a quote to illustrate my point. Well, more like an excerpt."
Republicans: *start to smile*
Booker: *slams a copy of the Silmarillion onto the podium*
Senator Booker: "Now, in closing..."
Republicans: *sit up straighter*
Booker: "I'd like to finish with a quote to illustrate my point. Well, more like an excerpt."
Republicans: *start to smile*
Booker: *slams a copy of the Silmarillion onto the podium*
April 1, 2025 at 5:06 PM
This is everything I have ever wanted from government.
Welp, at least I couldn't watch the Spartans lose cause I'm in the hospital with the toddler. Super fun.
She seems to be okay so far, just waiting to run tests to make sure.
She seems to be okay so far, just waiting to run tests to make sure.
March 30, 2025 at 11:43 PM
Welp, at least I couldn't watch the Spartans lose cause I'm in the hospital with the toddler. Super fun.
She seems to be okay so far, just waiting to run tests to make sure.
She seems to be okay so far, just waiting to run tests to make sure.
Not gonna lie, I can't bring myself to care about the WH correspondents dinner. It's arguably the reason we have Trump and is just a bunch of self important people congratulating themselves on being important.
March 29, 2025 at 9:08 PM
Not gonna lie, I can't bring myself to care about the WH correspondents dinner. It's arguably the reason we have Trump and is just a bunch of self important people congratulating themselves on being important.